Memories of a lifetime
by doperwtjes
Summary: When Sasuke loses his memory and finds a certain brunette next to him, all he wants is to find what he has lost. But will finding back his memory give him his life back or will he just loose even more?
1. Chapter 1

**Memories of a lifetime**

_When Sasuke loses his memory and finds a certain brunette next to him, all he wants is to find what he has lost. But will finding back his memory give him his life back or will he just loose even more?_

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><p><strong>Prologue<strong>

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><p>There was chaos. Everything was on fire, people were screaming, running and trying to escape from what was destroying the city. Nothing was kept whole and no one was kept alive unless they managed to flee. Another house was burned down, more people died of the fire or because they were attacked. Attacked by the monster that had suddenly appeared in the city and gone berserk on everything. It was throwing the people who tried to kill him into burning buildings, or just smashed their bodies to pulp. He was big and furious and gave out a roar that send shivers down everyone's spine. There was no escaping of this monster. It was not only too strong for the people of the city, but it was also too fast and out there to kill and destroy. It didn't take long before the entire city was on fire and most of the people were wiped out. The monster looked around, searching for more victims, searching for more to destroy. There was no reasonable thought in this monster's mind and thus, when he saw a certain boy, trying to flee with his family, the remaining citizens thought that he was next when the monster came running for him. Instead it killed the family members that tried to defend the boy and then hit the boy unconscious and killed the remaining of his family. It let out a devastating roar and then set all that was left of the city on fire and destroyed it all. All that was left was of the city was a burning piece of rubble and dead bodies. No one had escaped the monster's terror except for the boy he had spared.<p>

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><p><strong>Chapter 1<strong>

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><p>Neji let out a slight moan as he woke up from a deep state of unconsciousness. His head was throbbing and his body was stiff, it was protesting against him when he pushed himself up and tried to open his eyes. As he rubbed over a sore spot on his head, he remembered panic, pain and despair. He remembered hearing screams of agony from his mother before his mind clouded and he had been torn away from the horrible scene he was forced to look at. He knew what had happened. His parents had been killed. As he opened his eyes, he came face to face with the city he had once lived in, as it had turned to a cemetery consisting of ash. Tears came to his eyes as he realised that he had just lost everyone he loved and cared about, by the hands of a monster that he knew nothing about. He breathed in deeply, trying to think clear, trying to think of what he had to do, and where he should go. It was a complete mystery how he got to the edge of the city anyhow, he must have been carried here by someone. But who? And why did this person knock him out? As he blew out the breath he had been holding, he took a hold of the clothes close to his heart, gripping it firmly. He started shaking. What on earth did he have to do now?<p>

Neji was soon forced out of his panic as a moan, not very far from Neji, was heard and when he looked to see where it came from, he saw a boy with black raven hair laying in the forest as well. The boy gave out another moan and while his eyes were still closed, he put a hand to his head and a look of hurt moved over his face. He then opened his eyes to stare at the sky.

Neji was silent for some time as he looked at the boy. Did this boy bring him here? Or was the boy brought here as well? He did look like he had been hurt by the whole situation, like he had lost some people as well. Neji then turned his head to look at the city once more. Quickly blinking his tears away, he massaged his temples a little. He wanted to speak, but couldn't find the words. He'd rather scream now, then talk.

The boy let out another moan as he sat up and his eyes finally spotted Neji. He stared at him for a while before speaking.

"... Who are you?" The boy asked Neji.

Neji looked at the other for a while, before once more staring at the city.

"Neji." He then replied. "...Who are you?"

".. I'm not sure..." The boy said. "Sasuke.. I think." He frowned now, trying to remember his name.

Neji once more looked at the boy and looked into his eyes.

"Does your head hurt?" He then asked. "You might have a concussion and lost your memory."

"... I.. don't know." The boy, Sasuke, said. He looked back at Neji. "Why are we here? Am I supposed to know you?"

"You don't know if your head hurts?" Neji asked as his face slightly set into a frown. "Some monster ran into the city and killed everyone. It hit me unconscious and when I woke up you were there. I don't know what happened to you."

"... My head does hurt.. slightly." Sasuke said. ".. I can't remember what happened."

Neji looked at the boy, Sasuke, some longer, before he stood and walked over to him. He knelt down and took a slight hold of Sasuke's head, inspecting it for any injuries.

"It seems you didn't get a blow on your head that was serious." He then said.

"Then why can't I remember anything?" Sasuke asked as he pushed Neji's hands away. For some reason, he didn't like to be touched.

"Why do you think I know the answer?" Neji asked as he stood and took distance. "I'm going to take my leave now. I'm going to search for survivors." He then walked away from Sasuke, in the direction of his village. The guy didn't seem nice enough anyway.

But Sasuke got up and followed Neji nonetheless.

"Because... I can't remember and we woke up on the same spot. You must know me right." Sasuke said.

"No, I don't know you." Neji replied, without looking back. "Like I said, I don't know why we woke up at the same spot. I only know what happened to me, I know nothing of you."

"Well we must have had some link. What happened to you then?" Sasuke asked.

"Apparently I was knocked out and taken to the edge of the city after my parents were killed." Neji said, as he was searching for some survivors.

Sasuke was silent for some time as he looked at Neji and kept following him.

"... I'm sorry. What about my parents?" He asked. He was sure Neji knew more. He had to right?

Neji just let out a sigh now, as he pulled up a shutter in the floor of what had been the house of a friend of him, and he looked inside. He called his name, but there was no reply.

"I don't think the people who survived here are still here right now." Sasuke said, as he looked at Neji.

"Could you shut up for a second?" Neji now asked, shooting a glare into Sasuke's direction. "You never know if they are here and I've been in this basement for a couple of times, so I know the sound of the echo in here. I can hear if there are still people inside, perhaps unconscious or dead."

"Why, do you have some kind of powers?" Sasuke asked. "I really don't think anyone survived here, look at the place." He looked around the still smothering city. If his family was here too, then they would probably be dead as well.

"I have knowledge of the whole human body." Neji said, as he continued on searching. "And a lot as well."

"So what are you gonna do, look through the entire city for survivors? There are none. No one could have survived in this place." Sasuke said.

"I at least want to look what's left of my house, if you don't mind." Neji said, a little irritated.

"Fine. But can we get out of here after that? Those fumes aren't good for you or me." Sasuke said.

"Let me say one thing Sasuke: there is no 'we'." Neji said. "You can also leave already."

"Well where am I supposed to go? I can't remember a thing apart from my name." Sasuke said, looking at Neji.

"That's not my problem now is it?" Neji snapped as he walked further until he stopped by what used to be his house.

Sasuke followed Neji once again.

"Look, you have nowhere to go, neither do I. The 'smart' thing to do is stick together until we figure out where to go." He said, slightly annoyed by the way this guy was acting.

"Perhaps." Neji muttered, as he looked around. He took a few steps and knelt down by what he knew had once been their chimney. The stones were still there, the rest was gone. He already had had a bad feeling with living in a wooden house.

Sasuke looked at Neji, who was investigating the house. He could only imagine how it felt. He wasn't sure himself if he had lost his parents and he couldn't say that if that was the case, he was sad about it. How could he be, when he had no clue who they had been.

Neji walked through the house for some time, sometimes stopping to look somewhere or pick something up, and then continuing again. After some time he came walking back to Sasuke with a necklace in his hands, together with a knife his father always carried with him. When he had picked that up, he knew that the bodies of his parents had been right under his hands, burned to ash. He had said a little prayer, and promised himself to go into mourning soon.

"..I'm done here." He then said to Sasuke, looking up to the stranger in front of him.

Sasuke looked back at Neji and then nodded.

"I'm sorry for your loss." He said, not really sure what else to say now.

"…It's fine." Neji said as he nodded a little. "But thanks."

"... We should try and find a new city." Sasuke said. "And a little further then we'd like, because whatever did this could still be around."

"It didn't kill us now, so I doubt it kills us another time either." Neji said. "...He was killing everyone that crossed his path. And I definitely crossed his path, he looked right into my eyes. Anyway, I do agree with you to look for a new city to live in. The thing is, I never left the village. I don't know where to search. And I highly doubt that you are very useful for this goal."

Sasuke scowled at Neji for the last comment, even though he knew Neji was right. For some reason he didn't like being called useless at all. And for some reason, the word 'goal' rang a bell.

"Well I guess if we just keep walking we have to end up in a city sooner or later." Sasuke said.

"I hope we will." Neji replied as he nodded shortly. "And let's hope we will cross some people as well. Do you have any excellent skills that you do remember or is your head empty right now?"

"My head is never empty." Sasuke said, a hint of being offended was clear in his voice. "But I don't remember. I told you, I don't remember anything except my name. And age. Let's get going." He started walking towards the end of the city. Or at least what was left of it.

Neji let out a barely hear able sigh as he looked at the city one more time. After a final goodbye, he walked after Sasuke. Time to move on.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

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><p>That evening, Sasuke and Neji were sitting by a freshly made fire, roasting a deer they had caught. It had been quite the battle, since all they had was their bare hands and a small knife, but they had succeeded. Sasuke was staring into the fire for a while until he looked up to stare at Neji. There was something about this guy... about his eyes, that freaked the hell out of Sasuke.<p>

"Are you blind?" He suddenly asked.

Neji moved his stare on the fire towards Sasuke, as he was silent for some time.

"No." He then said. "In fact, I have very keen eyesight."

"Then why do you look like you are?" Sasuke asked. "You don't have pupils." He kept staring at Neji.

"I know." Neji answered. "My whole family was born with pure white eyes. I don't know how that came into the family. It is easy to recognise a family member though." He then removed a piece from the deer that they were roasting and tasted if they could already eat it. "It's almost done." He then said, nodding.

Sasuke nodded back.

"I'm bored, so tell me something about yourself." Sasuke said. He had figured out that his personality was somewhat of a commanding one. He felt like people should do what he said mostly. It just felt like that was how he was.

"Funny that that is the reason why you want to know something about me." Neji replied while he was busy roasting the deer.

"Just tell me, we're stuck together anyway." Sasuke said, once again looking at the fire. It was kind of mesmerizing.

"I don't talk on commando." Neji dryly replied.

"Then what are you gonna do, stay silent all night?" Sasuke asked, slightly annoyed.

"I didn't plan to no." Neji said. "I can also talk without being ordered to."

"Then answer a question. How old are you?" Sasuke asked. Maybe that would get Neji to talk. He couldn't come up with any other question.

"Twenty one." Neji said. "You knew your age as well, right?"

".. Twenty, I think at least." Sasuke said. "What did you do for a living?"

"I massaged people and I was a doctor." Neji replied. "Sort of at least."

"How can you be sort of a doctor?" Sasuke asked frowning.

"I wasn't an official doctor, but people sought me out a lot since I know a lot of the human body, as I told you." Neji said. He started to like Sasuke a little better. At least Sasuke was interested. Neji could ask things too, but since Sasuke didn't know anything now, it had no use.

"Then how come you know so much about the human body? You studied?" Sasuke asked and put his hands near the fire for a second, then retrieved them. Once again, he felt something odd. He didn't want Neji to know he was cold. That sounded pretty stupid.

"As well, but I know a lot from my past lives as well." Neji said, now taking the deer off of the fire and started to cut it. He had found a few flat stones and cleaned them, and was now cutting the meat onto it. "And I guess I have talent for it. It's my thing."

"Past lives? How can you know things of your past lives?" Sasuke asked frowning. "Cut some for me too."

"I am cutting meat for both of us, don't worry." Neji said. "I'm more aware then most persons of my past lives. I have an old soul." He looked at Sasuke now. Was it just him, or was Sasuke trying to dominate him in some way? It sure looked like that.

"Well that's just odd. So you know who you were in your past life?" Sasuke asked. He then suddenly turned around and looked into the forest. Something was out there.

"Lives." Neji corrected Sasuke. He followed Sasuke's gaze and then looked at Sasuke again. "Is something wrong?"

"..Something's walking there. Don't you hear it?" Sasuke asked as he kept staring. He could hear it very clear.

Neji looked at the forest once more.

"..No." He then said. "But even if it is, it doesn't have to be dangerous. It's a forest. It's full of life. It could just be a deer."

"No it's not a deer. It's bigger than that.. I can't place it, but it's about 1 kilometre away." Sasuke said. "I don't think it's very friendly either."

"'...Could it be the monster that attacked the village?" Neji asked, frowning now.

"I don't know, I can't make it out." Sasuke said. "... It surprises me that I can even figure out this much."

"Well you obviously have keen hearing." Neji said, now handing Sasuke some meat put on one of the small stones, as if it was a plate.

Sasuke took the stone without looking as he was still staring into the forest.

"I don't trust whatever is running around there." He said and then turned to Neji. "We should eat and continue walking."

"Is it coming this way?" Neji asked, as he started eating. He started to get slightly worried.

"It's getting closer, but it could be turning at some point. I don't think it knows we're here." Sasuke said as he started eating as well.

"Perhaps it smells the meat?" Neji asked. He didn't want to admit it, but he was scared to death that it would be the monster again. Who knows what that creature might be planning?

"It might. Let's just hurry up with eating and leave." Sasuke said. "I bet if we leave that deer behind it won't follow."

"Right." Neji said. "It's a pity though, we could have taken it with us."

"We'll catch more food." Sasuke said as he already finished eating. Meat seemed to taste great for some reason.

Neji nodded now.

"We definitely will." He then said. "We should wash our hands before we go." He ate the last of his meat now. He actually wanted a little more, but it was better to leave the deer behind now, he guessed.

"Take another piece." Sasuke said. "He's not here yet. Not close enough for us to worry."

"Good." Neji replied as he immediately took another piece. He was starving. He didn't know why, but the thought that Sasuke knew when they were in danger made him feel safe. He let Sasuke take over from now, to take care of their safety. He was not one to stuff his face, but this time it was needed.

They ate in silence for a while, before Sasuke got up.

"We need to go. It's speeding up." He said and looked into the forest again.

"Alright." Neji said, as he quickly put the last of his meat in his mouth and walked towards the river they were sitting close to. He washed his hands carefully, also his face, to get the scent off. "I hope it won't follow our scents."

Sasuke quickly washed his mouth and hands as well and then started walking away from the sounds.

"You have to hurry now." He said to Neji.

Neji quickly followed Sasuke.

"Is it coming?" He then asked, while wiping his hands.

"Yes." Sasuke answered and started walking a little faster. For some reason, this creature was speeding up.

Neji felt his heart beat in his throat as they hurried their way through the forest. He kept his mouth shut though, the creature could hear him talking if it came really close. Although apparently, it had a good nose and knew where to find food. Neji just prayed the food would be the deer they had been eating, and not themselves.

Sasuke kept on walking through the forest and only an hour later, he finally stopped.

"I think it's going away." He said. "You can sleep now."

Neji looked back for a moment, a little freaked out by the fact that Sasuke had kept on hearing the creature, and he hadn't heard a thing.

"Your ears are very good." He then said.

".. I guess they are." Sasuke said. "I still don't remember anything, so I'm surprised myself."

"In that case you probably will find out a lot more about yourself and be surprised more often." Neji said, as he looked around for a nice spot to sleep. It was turning dark quickly.

"Maybe." Sasuke said. "You go to sleep over there, I'll keep watch." He sat down on a fallen tree.

"Are you sure of that?" Neji asked. "We should switch watches." He now sat down onto the ground.

"I'm fine, I don't feel like sleeping." Sasuke answered. "Just go to sleep."

Neji looked at Sasuke for some more time, and then laid down on the ground.

"Wake me up when you're getting tired." He then said.

"Yeah I will. Goodnight." Sasuke said and then stared into the dark forest. He had stuff to think about. He needed to figure out who he was.

Neji closed his eyes after wishing Sasuke goodnight as well. Within five minutes, he was asleep.

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><p>The next day, Sasuke and Neji were once more walking, in search for a new place to live, or at least to meet some people that could help them further. As they reached the top of the hill they had been walking on, Neji let out a slight sigh of relief when he saw a small village laying beneath them.<p>

"Finally." He then said.

Sasuke looked down at the village and then started walking down.

"You wanna live here?" He asked. This village looked.. for too small and boring for his liking.

"I don't know." Neji said. "But let's at least stay here for some time. Perhaps there's a good inn."

"I hope so, but there's no way I will live here." Sasuke said. It didn't take long before they had made their way down and into the village. And one of the first buildings in the village was a small inn.

"Should we go there?" Sasuke asked Neji.

Neji looked at the inn and frowned a little.

"No." He then said. "I got a bad feeling about it. Let's search another one." Not accepting any protest, he walked further, to look for another inn. As he looked around, he saw the people on the street looking at them full of mistrust, but there also was some fear to be seen in their eyes. Their image on strangers obviously wasn't a good one. At all. They looked as if they wanted them to leave as soon as possible. Which Neji agreed with. The whole city was made of yellow looking stones, the age of it obvious to see because of the black spots that were covering it, together with a thick layer of dirt. There was no doubt that this little city wasn't ruled in a good way. At all.

"You know, I don't see any inns." Sasuke said as they walked through the city. "I think we should go back and stop bothering all these people's with our presence." He gave a few of the citizens who were looking a glare. How annoying.

"Just be quiet and let me handle this." Neji said, not showing that he was slightly annoyed by Sasuke. He was though. "And don't give them that dangerous look."

"Well they're staring. And you're not my mother." Sasuke said. Not that he knew who his mother was, but this was not the time to think of that.

Neji just ignored Sasuke as he looked around some more. Finally, he spotted another inn and immediately walked towards it.

"Well guess what, there happens to be another inn here after all." He said.

"How wonderful. And it looks so much better than the last one as well." Sasuke said, sarcasm dripping all over that comment. The inn looked almost exactly the same. It was just slightly bigger.

"If you think the other was better then go back there on your own." Neji said. "I'm going to this one. It feels less unpleasant."

"Still doesn't feel pleasant. But I wouldn't want you to get hurt." Sasuke said and gave Neji a smirk before walking into the inn.

"I can defend myself you know." Neji said, as he walked inside as well. He then walked up to the man who greeted them when they walked in. "Hello." He greeted the man. "We would like a room for two, if that's possible."

"Hello..." The man said and looked at Sasuke and Neji as if they were criminals. "Why do you need to stay here?"

"Maybe because we need to sleep. And I'd rather not sleep in the forest." Sasuke said, earning a glare from the man.

Neji gave Sasuke a look that obviously meant 'shut your damn mouth', and then looked to the inn owner.

"We are some of the few survivors of the attack of a monster on our city." Neji explained. "Our houses were burned down to the floor and everyone was dead or gone when we woke up. It's not safe in the forest right now. That's why we are in search of a room."

"... A monster attacked your city?" The owner asked, narrowing his eyes. "And you think you are safe here? Who says that monster didn't follow you?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes now.

"Just let us stay here." He said, ignoring Neji's looks.

"Sasuke here has very keen ears and he hasn't heard anything following us." Neji said. "We're not scared that the monster will follow us, but the forest is just not a safe place to sleep in without being guarded. And we're both exhausted, we walked all day."

"It's going to cost you 20 dollar per person." The man said and Sasuke frowned. He looked at Neji. He was broke.

Neji sighed slightly now.

"I think we both don't have money for that." He then said. "But I'm willing to do something in return. I'm a healer and I also know how to please the body and making it relax to the maximum."

The owner was silent for a while and Sasuke had trouble not staring at Neji as if he was crazy.

"... You're a whore?" The owner asked confused and Sasuke let out a snort.

"..No." Neji said, frowning deeply for once. "I was talking about massages and reki." He felt slightly offended though. What made the man think he was a whore?

"You should pick your words more carefully." Sasuke said as he looked at Neji, who kept silent.

"A massage won't make up for a forty dollar loss." The owner said. "Leave my inn."

"And having sex 'would' make up for that?" Neji now bit out, finding the whole situation very ridiculous. To think that someone said no to an offer like he had proposed.

"It might." The owner said. "I want you to leave, this inn is only for trustworthy people with money."

"That's not very nice, you could let us stay her for one night. It's not like those forty bucks are gonna get you out of this hellhole." Sasuke said calmly, but annoyed.

"We did have money but our city has been burned down." Neji said. "How would you like it when you lost everything and then no one wanted to help you?"

"We need the money. Sorry, please leave." The owner said and turned around, ready to walk away. But Sasuke wasn't done with this guy.

"Just give us a room you ass. That money is not gonna make your stinking life any better. Or that of anyone else in this stupid village." He snapped. He needed sleep.

Just when Neji opened his mouth to stop Sasuke, a voice behind them interrupted him.

"Then why don't you return to where you belong, 'Sasuke'?"

Sasuke frowned as he turned around and stared at a guy who was smirking at him like mad. The guy had greyish hair and glasses and looked... weird, but familiar somehow.

"... How do you know my name?" Sasuke asked.

A slight look of surprise mingled with the broad smirk, but it was barely see able.

"That's a funny question Sasuke." He then said. "Don't you remember me? I thought I made a better impression on you then that."

"Who are you? How do you know me?" Sasuke asked now. If this guy knew his name, he knew who he was. At least for some part. This was his chance to figure it out.

"My my, did you lose your memory?" The guy now asked, and let out a slight laugh. "What a pity. We know each other from the past Sasuke. And hopefully, from the future as well." Neji meanwhile looked at the guy with his normal blank stare, but from the inside he was a little worried and cautious. What was with this guy? He didn't look trustable, he looked like a criminal that didn't plan anything good. At all.

"Then how do you know me?" Sasuke asked again. "Who the hell are you?" He was getting really annoyed by this guy. And it felt like that wasn't the first time either.

"We know each other from the past." The guy repeated. "And let's say that I'm the one above you, but under the one who stands even closer to you." He then smirked. "Your transformation has been interesting."

"My what? I don't get it. If you know me, then tell me who I am." Sasuke snapped, glaring at the guy.

"You are Uchiha Sasuke." The guy replied. He then smirked broadly once more. "See ya." With that, the image of the guy standing in front of them suddenly faded, and it was like he was being blown away by a wind that no one felt in the room. By now everyone was staring at them.

Sasuke stared at the place where the guy had disappeared. He then let out a frustrated growl, hitting a candle of a table. The owner now glared at both Neji as Sasuke.

"Now get the hell out of my inn unless you have something real precious to offer me." He snapped.

Neji now gave the owner a glare and before Sasuke could explode, Neji took Sasuke by the arm and took him outside with him, feeling that it had no use to stay there any longer.

"You don't remember anything of this guy?" He then asked.

"Of course not, otherwise I would have said so." Sasuke snapped, pulling his arm loose. "He seemed familiar but I can't place him at all." This was frustrating to no end. If only he could just get his memory back.

"There is no need to snap at me now Sasuke." Neji replied. "Let's try the other inn now."

"And then? All these people are the same. I vote walking on and hoping for a better city. Or better yet, finding that guy." Sasuke said.

"I think it's better to try to make some money here." Neji said. "So then we can pay for a room next time."

"I'm not going to work in this village." Sasuke said annoyed.

"Then what do you want to do, sleep in the forest once more and having the risk to be killed?" Neji asked, pulling up an eyebrow. "It's not because this inn keeper was not nice that everyone is like this."

"You said you had a bad feeling with the other inn and this one hasn't worked out well at all. Imagine what will happen at the other one." Sasuke said. "I'll just stay awake again."

"What is your option Sasuke." Neji said, not sounding nice anymore now. He had no idea what to do either at this moment.

"I just told you, we move on, hope for another city and if we don't, I'll just stay awake again." Sasuke snapped.

"It's already dark Sasuke." Neji then said. "But fine. I will ask someone." He walked up to a big man that looked more trustable then the others, and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Excuse me, can I ask you something?" He asked. He just hoped Sasuke would keep his mouth shut.

The man looked at Neji and then answered.

"What is it?" He asked. Sasuke meanwhile sighed as he followed Neji and crossed his arms. This guy was annoying.

"Do you have any idea what is the closest city from here on, heading towards the north?" Neji asked. He just hoped this man would help them and be nice.

"If you are planning to go there now, good luck. It will take you at least six hours by foot to get there." The man said.

"Then do you know a place where me and my friend could stay over the night?" Neji asked. It was so frustrating that the cities were laying so far apart from each other. It was a wonder that they had found a city by the end of the day, but that they weren't accepted here because of the money, was like a hit in the face. They needed money, and fast.

"I can offer you a place to stay. I have a spare bedroom at my place, so if you want you can sleep there." The man said. Sasuke narrowed his eyes slightly. That was an awkward offer. All the citizens looked at them as if they were monsters and this guy offered them a place to stay? It didn't add up.

Neji looked at Sasuke for a second, and then looked at the guy again.

"We don't have money to pay you with." He then said.

"That's ok." The man said. "I wouldn't want two young men sleeping outside. Just because most people here aren't that nice to outsiders, doesn't mean everyone is."

"We're moving to the next city Neji." Sasuke said. This guy wanted more.

Neji looked at Sasuke now.

"Why?" He then asked. He didn't get what could possibly wrong with not accepting this offer. The guy was just being friendly. He looked like he had the age that he had kids himself, so Neji could imagine the thought of two young boys sleeping in the forest disturbed him.

"Just because." Sasuke said and grabbed Neji's arm, pulling him with him. He could see the man watching Neji. Looking at him with a dirty look.

Neji walked a little further with Sasuke before stopping them, when they were out of hearing section of the man.

"Now what is the reason you didn't want to go in to that offer?" He asked.

"He wanted to have sex with you." Sasuke said as he looked at Neji. "You're stupid if you didn't see that."

"I'm amazed by the fact you're able to pull off conclusions this quickly Sasuke." Neji said. "No, I didn't see it. Because that's the last thing that comes up on my mind. Even if he did want it, he didn't look like the person to force this kind of stuff onto people."

"Well he was." Sasuke said. "I just know that." It was a downer to realize, but Sasuke knew they were in even more trouble then he initially thought. Not only did 'he' not know his powers, Neji didn't have any and they were both not unattractive boys. Anyone could take advantage if they didn't watch out. No one could be trusted.

"Trust me, if he would have tried that, I could have stopped him." Neji said. "I think we should go back to him and apologize. Even if he wants sex, he did offer us a free place to stay. He didn't say we have to have sex with him. Believe me Sasuke, I can stop the guy if he tries anything. If he touches you, wake me up."

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"We can't trust him." He said. "We can't trust him and I won't. If you wanna risk him raping you, then go ahead, but I won't. And don't talk to me as if I can't defend myself."

"You don't know your powers but I do." Neji said.

"Well what can you do then hm?" Sasuke asked annoyed. Neji acted as if he had superior powers or something.

"I can control someone's body." Neji snapped at Sasuke, offended by Sasuke's behaviour. "I can take over. So when he tries something, I don't even need to push him off."

Sasuke looked at Neji now, slightly confused.

"... How then?" He asked.

"I control blood." Neji then said, looking at Sasuke with a deadly serious look on his face.

Sasuke was silent for a while as he looked at Neji. That was creepy.

"... Well.. that's a nice power." He finally said, not knowing what else to say.

"So are we taking up his offer or not Sasuke." Neji said. "What is more dangerous, sleeping in the house of someone who might long for sex or sleeping in a forest that's filled with creatures we don't know of and people who might be wanting to kill you?"

"No one wants to kill me. And I still don't think we should sleep in the house of a guy planning on having sex with you. Even if you can control it, he might just do something to stop you." Sasuke said.

"Like what?" Neji asked. He just didn't get the problem. "And you don't know if no one wants to kill you. You don't know what you might have done before you lost your memory."

"What, you think I'm some kind of murderer now or something?" Sasuke snapped.

"Sasuke, would you please listen carefully to what I'm saying instead of jumping out of your skin immediately?" Neji asked. "You 'might' have done something wrong. You simply don't know. People know you, and not the other way around. Just like the guy just now. And answer my question. What could he do to stop me from controlling his body? If he doesn't even know of my powers?"

"You don't know his powers either." Sasuke snapped. "I just don't think it's a good idea, so if you want to sleep there, go ahead. I'll be sleeping in the forest."

"Fine." Neji said, and walked away from Sasuke.

Sasuke scowled at Neji and then followed him.

"If either one of us gets raped, it's gonna be all your fault." He snapped.

"Sure Sasuke." Neji said. "Just wake me up." He then walked towards the man. "I'm sorry for that sir, we would love to spend the night in the room you offered us."

"Really? Well then follow me, I was just on my way." The man said. Sasuke growled a little. No one was this nice. And if anything would happen, he would either tell Neji 'I told you so' or he would beat the crap out of Neji if anything happened to himself.

Neji shot Sasuke a look and then followed the man. They might as well get the chance to find out more about this city and even about the man that knew Sasuke. They walked for some time until they reached the man's house, that stood a little apart from the rest of the houses, but did look cleaner than the rest. Neji knew they had made a good choice. It wouldn't matter who's house they stayed in, every person had a bad side.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

* * *

><p>The next morning, Sasuke woke up out of a deep, deep sleep. He blinked a few times against the light in his room. He felt like he had been KO all night, he hadn't heard a thing. He had just been gone. But he could vaguely remember hearing fighting. And he wasn't sure if it was a dream or not. When he looked aside, he saw Neji was already up. Sasuke took his chance to ask.<p>

"Did anything happen?"

Neji looked at Sasuke as he was combing his hair.

"..No." He then said. "Nothing happened tonight. Did you sleep well?"

"Yes. I thought I heard people fighting tonight. You'd better not be lying to me." Sasuke said as he got up.

"I'm not lying to you." Neji said. "I told you that it would be fine to stay here."

"Are you sure nothing happened?" Sasuke asked as he looked in the mirror and saw his torn clothes. He was sure he had looked better.

"Why do you want to know so badly?" Neji asked, as he stood from the chair he had been sitting on. "As you can see, I'm not wounded or hurt in any way. The only thing I feel now is that I'm hungry and I recall that our host said something about that we could get something to eat this morning as well."

"Well sorry. I felt like I passed out last night, so I wouldn't know if anything had happened." Sasuke said, rolling his eyes. "Did he say anything about clothes?"

"Not that I'm aware of, but I'll ask him." Neji replied, and then walked out of the room, towards the living room. He saw the owner of the house sitting in his living room while eating some bread, and walked over him.

"I want to thank you for your hospitality, it's very kind of you to take us inside this night." He then said.

Sasuke followed Neji, rubbing his hair to make it look presentable and then looked at the owner of the house. He still didn't trust this guy one bit.

"Of course, you're welcome. Breakfast is on the table, if you are hungry, you can eat." The owner said and gave Neji a weird smile.

"Thank you so much." Neji said, giving the other a slight bow. "Do you know by any chance where to get a set of clothes? As you can see, Sasuke's clothes are torn and he rather won't go out in public like this."

"I have some old clothes of my son. He grew out of them, but your friend seems to be able to fit in them." The owner said. Sasuke glared at him. That was an indirect comment saying he was short and Sasuke didn't like it one bit.

"Sir, you are too kind." Neji said, as he shook his head once. "We can't accept all these things without paying you for it."

"It's fine. Now I need to go to work soon, so I would appreciate it if you would hurry up." The man, called Iyuka, said.

"Don't worry, we can't wait to leave." Sasuke mumbled.

"We will." Neji said, as he walked over to the table and took Sasuke with him. He then started eating. He was starving.

Sasuke sat down at the table and started eating as well.

"He called me short." He said, still offended about it.

Neji send Sasuke a look and then let out a short chuckle.

"Compared to him, you are short." He said.

"I am not short." Sasuke hissed. Obviously he had problems with his own height. But he wasn't short.

"Just stop talking." Neji said as he continued eating. He knew the guy wanted them to hurry.

"Pfft. Fine." Sasuke said and then ate as fast as he could. Which was fast. He finished his breakfast before Neji was halfway through it.

After some time, Neji was done as well, as he stood from the table.

"Another time, thank you for your hospitality." He then said. "We will be taking our leave now."

"Alright. I put the clothes by the door, you can change there." Iyuka told Sasuke. "Good luck with finding a new place."

"Thanks a lot." Neji said, nodding to Iyuka. "Have a good day." As they walked towards the door and they passed Iyuka, Neji blew out some breath. Thank god the man didn't try something again. He knew Sasuke would have set up a fight right away.

Sasuke gave Iyuka a last glare and then followed Neji. He quickly changed into his new clothes, which fitted him perfectly and that in turn pissed him off. Both he and Neji then went outside.

"So. Next city?" He asked.

Neji gave Sasuke a slight smile now.

"Yes." He then said. "Next city."

* * *

><p>Neji let out a moan as he slowly opened his eyes. He didn't recall ever feeling as bad as he did now. He was burning, he was feeling sick, his head hurt, his body felt like every muscle had ripped and he was sweating. What had happened to him? As he opened his eyes fully he noticed that something cold had and wet had been laid onto his head. Was it Sasuke who had done that?<p>

"Hey." A voice from beside Neji said and when Neji looked where it come from, he saw Sasuke, making some food.

"Don't move your head." Sasuke said, pushing Neji's head back so the cold piece of clothing wouldn't fall off Neji's head.

Neji kept looking at Sasuke now.

"...What happened?" He then asked. He could barely remember what had happened that could have let him end up like this.

"You just collapsed while we were walking." Sasuke answered. "I took you with me to find a place to stay. You've been sleeping for a day now."

Neji looked away now, not liking to hear something like this. Sure, he had felt bad for some days, but he wasn't one to complain about things like these. To actually think he had fainted like he was some kind of weak girl.

"Right.." He then said. He then realised that Sasuke had actually taken care of him, a side he didn't know of Sasuke.

"Do you need anything?" Sasuke asked as Neji was silent for a while. "I have water, berries and meat."

"Some water and a few berries would be good." Neji said, admitting that he was pretty thirsty. He also felt like he should eat every vitamin he could get and also something light, so the berries would be great. However, when his nose suddenly picked up the smell of the meat, his stomach reacted heavily by growling loudly. In a second, Neji's face was redder then it already was from the fever he was having.

Sasuke smirked a little at Neji and then picked up some of the berries. He pushed Neji up carefully and placed him against the tree that was near before handing the berries to him.

"You can have some meat as well if you want. I don't think those berries will make you any less hungry." Sasuke said.

Neji leaned against the tree as he ate some of the berries, silently enjoying them to the maximum.

"I'll first eat the berries." He then replied.

"That's fine." Sasuke said and then put the small bowl of water beside Neji. "If you need more, I'll go and get it."

"Thank you." Neji replied and was silent for some time, while eating his berries and sometimes drinking some water for the bowl. He then spoke up again. "...I never expected you to be able to take care of others."

"Well that's very nice of you." Sasuke said, immediately offended.

"Don't be offended so quickly Sasuke." Neji said. "You are the one who keeps on playing the tough guy."

"I'm not playing anything." Sasuke said. "Besides, if I won't take care of you, we'll be stuck here forever."

"You could also let me die in here." Neji said, shrugging slightly.

Sasuke looked at Neji now.

"... You're really sick aren't you?" He said. He hadn't expected Neji to feel so bad.

Neji looked at Sasuke for a moment before looking away once again.

"It's not that bad, but I don't feel good." He then said.

"It's fine if you're sick Neji." Sasuke said. "Don't act like a 'tough guy'." He smirked at Neji.

Neji gave Sasuke a slight glare, before taking a sip of his water. Which only lead him to choke on it and burst out into coughing. Embarrassed, he tried to wave it away, but once again his cheeks were coloured with a blush of shame.

"You should calm down." Sasuke said. "It really is fine if you're sick. Do you need anything? More berries?"

"I g-guess some meat w-would do after.. *cough* a-all.." Neji gasped, trying to get his breath back. Damn it.

Sasuke nodded as he grabbed some of the roasted meat and gave it to Neji.

"I found out I like it better raw." Sasuke said. "Drink some water."

"You l-like raw meat?" Neji asked, and lifted the bowl to his lips again and drank some of it. As he leaned down to put the bowl back, he suddenly started to see some black dots in front of his face. Within a few seconds it was fully black in front of his eyes and he let out a moan as he nearly fell down on the ground again. He caught himself with his left arm in time, gripping his head with his right hand in the mean time.

Sasuke was by Neji's side in a second and pulled him back up. He sat Neji up against the tree again and looked at him, slight worry on his face.

"Are you ok?" He asked as he took the bowl from Neji's lap and put it away. Sadly, Neji's pants were now wet.

Neji swallowed as he blinked to get his vision back, before nodding a little.

"Yeah.. I just have to watch out." He then said, leaning his head back against the tree and closing his eyes to try to calm down his body.

"Yeah you do. I have to take off your pants." Sasuke said and his hands were already on the hem of Neji's pants, pulling it down slightly.

"Why?" Neji asked with a groan, as he opened his eyes and looked at Sasuke.

"Because you spilled water over your pants." Sasuke said and pulled the pants off, hanging them over a branch.

Neji pulled his now naked legs up a little, not liking how cold he felt now.

"..Is the meat still warm?" He then asked.

"Yeah, I just roasted it, right before you woke up. Eat it fast and it will be warm." Sasuke said. "And to answer your question, yes I like raw meat."

Neji nodded as he took the meat and started eating some of it in silence. He had to admit it felt really good to eat something now.

Sasuke watched Neji eat like that. He didn't want to admit it, but he found Neji looking rather... cute this way. Stupid too, but cute. And so he stared.

After a while, Neji caught Sasuke staring at him. Cursing himself to hell, he once more blushed.

"..What?" He asked.

Sasuke looked away quickly now.

"... Nothing." He said, feeling like an idiot. He quickly ate some of his own, raw meat.

Neji focussed his attention back on his meat, but had to admit he was a little weirded out by how Sasuke was acting. It didn't make sense to him.

"I want to find that man." Sasuke said, to break the silence. Although he really did want to find that man. Because that man knew who he was.

"...The man with the glasses?" Neji asked.

"Yes." Sasuke said nodding. "I need to know who I am."

"I don't think this guy meant any good." Neji commented.

"I don't care, he knows who I am." Sasuke said.

"Perhaps we will meet others who know more." Neji said. "I hope we will."

"In the mean time, I will be keeping my eyes open for that guy." Sasuke said. "Do you want more meat to be roasted?"

"It's fine like this." Neji said, nodding gratefully to Sasuke.

"Ok." Sasuke said nodding. "Anything else?"

Neji shook his head.

"No thanks." He then said. "Thank you for helping me like this."

"You're welcome. Now you owe me." Sasuke said.

Neji smiled slightly now.

"I guess so." He then said.

"So how long do you think it will take before you can start walking again?" Sasuke asked.

"I have no idea, especially since only bowing forward is too much already." Neji said, frowning a little. He looked up when he suddenly heard a sound from not too far away from them. It was a wolf howling.

Sasuke turned into the direction from the howl and then looked at Neji, his face dead serious as he took the knife he had used to cut the meat.

"It's coming this way." He said. How come he hadn't heard this creature before?

Neji frowned even more deeply as another howl sounded through the forest, and this time even closer. Then even footsteps were being heard and they came closer in rapid speed. With a loud growl the wolf suddenly jumped out of the bushes and stopped right in front of Sasuke, growling to him and showing his teeth.

Sasuke grabbed the knife tightly and held it before him. He was lucky Neji was so close behind him, otherwise he had more to worry about.

The wolf walked closer now, giving Sasuke a threatening bark.

"...Sasuke, perhaps we have to get out of here." Neji said, as he saw the wolf getting ready to attack Sasuke.

"That wolf runs a lot faster then me, especially when I have to carry you as well." Sasuke said and took a step back. If that wolf would attack, he would just have to counter it.

Neji looked at the wolf again, who seemed to follow their interaction. He furrowed his browns as the wolf suddenly did something he hadn't expected.

"Get out of my forest." The wolf suddenly growled. It was very rare for animals like wolfs to talk. Of course there were some that could talk without being half human, but they were really rare. So it was a wonder they had stumbled onto one now.

Sasuke looked at the wolf a little flabbergasted but then recovered from that again.

"What?" He asked. "'Your' forest?"

"It's forbidden to sleep in this forest without my or my family's permission." The wolf growled now. "This is Inuzuka ownage. You're not supposed to be here."

"... Well how am I supposed to know that?" Sasuke asked. He felt like an idiot, talking to a wolf. "Besides, I can't leave, my friend is sick."

"Are you travellers?" The wolf now asked, narrowing his eyes. It was obvious that the wolf didn't like strangers.

"I guess we are. Our city was attacked and now we need a new one." Sasuke said. Why was he answering questions of a wolf?

The wolf was silent for some time, before he nodded.

"You should head towards the east." He then said. "I see you don't mean any harm to the forest, nor to me and my family."

"No I don't. Is there a city to the east?" Sasuke asked. This wolf was strange. Now he was suddenly friendly?

"Yes, very close." The wolf answered. "I should introduce myself." Suddenly, the wolf stood on his back paws and his skin started changing colour, as well was the form of his body. It started transforming, and before they could blink, there was a boy with a cheeky grin standing in front of them. He put his hand forwards.

"Hey." He then said. "I'm Kiba."

Sasuke looked at the boy, Kiba, with big eyes before slowly shaking his hand.

"..That was weird." He said. "I'm Sasuke."

"Heya." Kiba said, nodding to Sasuke. He then walked to Neji and stuck out his hand again, and Neji introduced himself to Kiba as well. Kiba then cleared his throat. "So should we get you to our dorm and ask my mom to give you some medicines?"

"Is your family a pack of wolfs?" Sasuke asked, still staring at Kiba. This was weird. Really, really weird.

"We're humans, but we have wolf blood in us." Kiba explained. "We can transform in our wolf form any time. But around other humans we mostly prefer our human form, to not scare them away."

"And you don't think changing from wolf to human in front of them will scare 'em off?" Sasuke asked. "Where is this dorm of yours?"

"Chill out dude." Kiba said, while pulling up his eyebrows. "The dorm is a little further from here, deeper into the forest."

"Ok. Well if he has medicines, we should go with him Neji." Sasuke said and before Neji could do anything, or protest, Sasuke had pulled him up in his arms.

Neji groaned a little now, but decided to not tell Sasuke about the spots that were in front of his eyes again.

"Don't... forget my pants." He grumbled, obviously not liking being carried. Kiba grinned at noticing this.

"Do you want to take his pants?" Sasuke asked Kiba. "And tell me, what's it like to change into something else?" It felt familiar to him, changing into another creature. But he had no clue why.

Kiba walked towards Neji's pants and then tossed them over his shoulder, and started walking.

"What it's like?" He then asked. "..I have no idea how to describe that. When I was a baby, I could already change into a pup."

Sasuke followed Kiba and looked at him while he was talking.

"So do you have more powers when you change into a wolf?" He asked. Why did he ask something like that?

"Not magical powers no." Kiba said. "I'm not a magical creature. Not at all. Are you?"

"Not that I know." Sasuke said, shaking his head. He wanted to find out what his powers were really badly.

"You don't know if you posses some powers?" Kiba asked, now looking surprised.

"I lost my memory." Sasuke answered. "And I can tell you, it's very annoying."

"Wow." Kiba said, lifting his eyebrows as he pushed some plants out of his way. "I can imagine. That's very frustrating. So your city was burned down right? Were you sure you lived there? It could even be the case you were a traveller then, right?"

Sasuke looked at Kiba now.

".. I know." He said. "But until I know that for sure, I'd like to think I came from somewhere."

"I can understand." Kiba said. "Are you a good jumper? The dorm lies surrounded by a big river, so not a lot of people can go there. We wolves can easily jump there, but humans have it less easy. I could also carry you on my back while we jump over the river."

"I'm not sitting on your back. I'll be fine." Sasuke said. "I'm sure I can just walk through it."

"Do you honestly think that if we could walk through the river we would do the effort of jumping over it?" Kiba asked. "It's a wild river, and pretty deep as well. If you step into it, Neji won't make it alive."

"Fine. You take Neji then, I'll walk through it." Sasuke said. He was sure he could handle a little river.

"Idiot, if I say this river is strong, I mean it." Kiba said, a little annoyed now. He pushed some bushes aside and then pointed at what laid beneath their feet. "Do you want to walk through 'that'?" He asked. Beneath them laid a deep river with a heavy stream. Although the river laid at least four metres beneath them, they still got wet because of the heavy waves that splashed onto them. "Good luck buddy." Kiba said as he changed into a wolf again.

Sasuke looked at the river and then sighed.

"Fine, we'll sit on your back then." He said, slightly annoyed. He felt annoyed because he needed someone else's help.

"I'll bring Neji to the other side first, and then you." Kiba now growled, as he walked back a little so he could run towards the river and jump. "Can you put him on my back?"

Sasuke nodded and put Neji on Kiba's back.

"Hold on tight. I don't wanna have to jump in that river after you if you fall off." He said to Neji.

Neji nodded as he slightly laid down onto Kiba's back and held onto him tightly.

"Ready?" Kiba asked and when Neji secured Kiba it was fine, Kiba started running like mad towards the river. When he was on the edge he jumped, and jumped right over the river and reached the other end. As Neji slid off of Kiba's back and sat down on the ground, Kiba jumped back to the other side and made ready for the next jump

Sasuke sat down on Kiba's back and held onto him as well.

"You can jump." He said.

Kiba nodded and once again started jumping. Effortless he jumped over the river once more.

"There." He then said. "We're almost there now."

Sasuke quickly got off Kiba's back and pulled Neji up again.

"And you're sure your family won't eat us?" He asked Kiba.

Kiba snorted now.

"We're no cannibals Sasuke." He then said. "We eat the same as normal people, but we prefer it raw."

"Well so do I." Sasuke said. "You seemed like you were about to eat me before you turned friendly." He gave Kiba a slight grin.

"Tear you apart is more like it." Kiba joked, as he continued walking towards their destination.

"Very funny." Sasuke said. "How are you feeling Neji?"

"A little sore." Neji muttered. "I feel like sleeping.. a lot."

"Well then do it." Sasuke said. "Is it far from here?" He asked Kiba.

"Within fifteen minutes of walking we will be there I guess." Kiba said, while Neji snuggled a little closer into Sasuke's chest. "If you can carry him around for so long he could easily take a nap. Is he heavy?"

"He weighs nothing. Don't snuggle." Sasuke told Neji. "I'll be fine with carrying him fifteen more minutes."

"Good." Kiba said and slightly smiled as he saw Neji closing his eyes immediately, but ignoring Sasuke's comment, because he snuggled even closer to the warmth of Sasuke's chest.

"Neji." Sasuke said stern, but he knew Neji was gonna ignore him anyway. He didn't like someone like Neji being so close to him.

" So how did he get this ill anyway?" Kiba asked, trying to start a conversation.

"I have no idea." Sasuke said. "One moment he was fine, the next he had passed out on the floor."

"Tough guy hm?" Kiba asked, smirking a little.

"No he acts like that. And then he has the nerves to tell me I act like a tough guy." Sasuke said.

Kiba just chuckled and shook his head. It was obvious that there was some jealousy in the air.

"So what do you already know about yourself?" He then asked.

"That I have good hearing, my name, my age and that some weird guy with glasses knows me but doesn't want to tell me who I am." Sasuke answered.

" That's weird." Kiba said, pulling up an eyebrow. " Well, you'll probably find out more about yourself soon. Let's hope your memory returns quickly."

"Yeah." Sasuke said. "So are we there yet? Neji's suddenly a lot heavier now that he's sleeping."

"Is he sleeping or did he pass out again?" Kiba asked, as he send a look into Neji's direction. "He looks ghostly pale. We're almost there."

"I don't know. We'll have to find out when we're in your dorm." Sasuke said, shaking his head.

Kiba nodded. After they walked a little further, they arrived at an open place that was covered in high hills with doors and windows in them. They were remarkable houses, but obviously, Kiba's family loved houses like these. Kiba immediately ran up to his mom, who changed into a human when she saw there were other humans.

"Mom!" Kiba said. "I met some guys, and one of them is ill. Can you please look at him?"

Kiba's mother looked at him and then nodded as she had inspected Sasuke and Neji.

"Lead them into the house and put that boy on the couch." She said. "But next time, don't just take them here pup, you know what can happen." Sasuke snorted a little at hearing Kiba's mother call him pup.

"Yes mom, sorry." Kiba said, as he took Sasuke and thus Neji with him inside. "They just looked trustable." He said to his mom, who was following them both inside. When Sasuke put Neji on the couch, Kiba was taken back a little when he saw that Neji's face had turned white by now. Not a tough boy, sure. This guy didn't give any hint that he had pain and he looked this bad. There obviously was something going on with this guy.

"He doesn't look good for sure." Kiba's mother said. Sasuke frowned a little when he saw Neji lying on the couch. How come Neji hadn't just told him he was feeling this bad? Kiba's mother, Tsume, was inspecting Neji now.

"Sasuke told me that Neji collapsed out of nothing, and was dizzy a lot." Kiba explained to his mom.

Tsume stopped inspecting for a while when her hands were on Neji's stomach. She pushed down on it a little and earned a moan from him.

".. His stomach is swollen. What did he eat?" She asked Sasuke.

"Err, some berries and meat." Sasuke answered and when Tsume pulled up Neji's shirt, they saw just how much his stomach was swollen. It looked horrible.

Kiba frowned a little now.

"Where did you get those berries?" He then asked. "A lot of berries in this area are poisonous. It could be that he got poisoned. Did you eat from them?"

"No I apparently don't like berries." Sasuke said, shaking his head. "I tasted one just to be sure and nothing happened."

"Well he is poisoned alright. And he has a high fever as well. I think we need a healer to get him back on his feet." Tsume said and Sasuke frowned. Great. He had poisoned Neji.

"Do you think that it's deadly?" Kiba asked while frowning. "..I could bring them to Tsunade mom."

"If we don't do anything, it could rupture his stomach." Tsume said. "I think Tsunade should see him. You will go with them Kiba."

Kiba nodded now, as he immediately changed into a wolf.

"I will go there as soon as possible." He then said. "Sasuke, can you put Neji down on my back and sit down behind him and keep him straight?

"..Sure." Sasuke said as he picked up Neji. "Shouldn't we go outside first?"

"Just hurry it up. And pup, don't get yourself in trouble." Tsume said.

"I won't mom." Kiba said. "And it's fine Sasuke, I have a strong back. We need to hurry."

"Ok. Thank you miss." Sasuke said and he sat down on Kiba's back, holding Neji in place.

"You're welcome. Now off you go pup." Tsume said and waved at her son.

Kiba immediately started wagging his tail and then started running. He warmed up his muscles before his speed increased and within only a minute they were at the river and he jumped right over it.

"Don't worry Sasuke, within two hours, we'll be there." Kiba said.

"We'd better. Neji looks horrible." Sasuke said. Neji'd better survive this.

"Check regularly if he's still breathing, ok?" Kiba asked.

"I am." Sasuke said. His hand was constantly before Neji's mouth. "Who is this Tsunade woman?"

"She's a friend of my mom, the best healer in the country." Kiba said. "She can heal Neji for sure."

"Ok good." Sasuke said. He felt awkward. Knowing that it was guilt made it easier to place, but it felt like something he rarely felt.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

* * *

><p>Sasuke was sitting on a chair in an unfamiliar room. He was looking at Neji, who was being healed by Tsunade. Kiba and him had raced through the forest, to this city, had found Tsunade relatively easily and then had asked her (Sasuke had more like commanded her) if she could heal Neji. She had checked him and then started. Sasuke found himself unable to leave Neji's side though. And that made him wonder. Why was he so worried and why did that worry feel so unfamiliar? And why about Neji? Neji didn't know him, there was nothing to gain and Neji wasn't exactly the nicest guy in the world. Or maybe that was exactly the reason Sasuke had taken a liking in Neji. Neji really did feel like a friend. And that was probably why Neji being near death worried him. He still didn't understand though, what that other feeling inside him was, when he looked at Neji now. Apart from guilt and worry, he shouldn't be feeling anything else. But there was another feeling. He couldn't place it though. Sasuke was then brought out of his thoughts, when a moan was heard from Neji. He stood up from his chair and looked at Neji.<p>

"Is he ok?" He asked.

"Chill out Sasuke, he just moaned." Kiba said, as he too was watching the operation. He knew Tsunade was so concentrated that she wouldn't reply to Sasuke's questions. She would only speak if Neji would be awake and there was some information she needed of him. Kiba furrowed his brows though as another moan came from Neji and Neji slowly opened his eyes.

"Is he ok?" Sasuke asked once again as he looked at Neji. Tsunade frowned a little, as she was still busy getting the poison out of Neji. He shouldn't be awake right now.

Neji now looked at Tsunade as he swallowed.

"..W-what hng... is happening?" He then asked.

"Lay still." Tsunade said. "I'm healing you."

"I asked a question." Sasuke said, starting to get annoyed.

"Sasuke just shut up and let her concentrate." Kiba now said, now getting annoyed by Sasuke.

"Well I want to know." Sasuke told Kiba.

"How are you feeling Neji?" Tsunade asked.

Neji looked at the woman now and was silent for some time, before replying.

"Not g-good.." He then said.

"I can imagine. I'm almost done, after that you will start to feel better soon." Tsunade said, getting more of the poison out of Neji' stomach.

Neji closed his eyes as he tried to breath normally through his nose, but he found out his breath was fast and uncontrolled. It was probably because of the pain he was feeling. God.. what had happened to make him feel this way?

"Next time you take berries from someone, make sure they're not poisoned." Tsunade said as she worked the last bit of poison out of Neji's body.

"...T-they were poisonous?" Neji asked weakly, frowning a little. He hadn't tasted anything suspicious on those berries.

"Yes they were. The might taste sweet, but that's exactly what nature tried to do. Sweet things aren't supposed to be poisonous but they are." Tsunade answered and once she was done, she checked Neji's fever. "It seems to be coming down."

"I g-guess." Neji muttered.

"Thanks a lot Tsunade." Kiba said, nodding gratefully to the friend of his mother.

"You're welcome. I'll leave the three of you alone to talk and come check up in half an hour." Tsunade said and got up.  
>"Do you want me to leave too?" Kiba asked Sasuke now, while he was looking at Neji's besweated face.<p>

"Why would I want you to leave too?" Sasuke asked Kiba, looking at him as if he was crazy. What was Kiba thinking?

"..Don't you want to be alone with Neji?" Kiba asked now with a frown, talking softly so Neji couldn't hear it.

"Why would I want to be alone with Neji?" Sasuke asked back, also keeping his voice down slightly.

Kiba just frowned at Sasuke now and then shrugged, as he sat down. He thought there was some kind of deeper bond between the two of them but apparently, he had been wrong.

Sasuke looked at Kiba for a while, before he pulled a chair next to Neji's bed and looked at him.

"Are you starting to feel better?" He asked.

Neji looked at Sasuke and then nodded slightly. He was spend though. He was so tired he couldn't even move his legs.

"Well w-we did learn something of those berries hm." Neji softly said.

"Yeah, we did." Sasuke said. "We learned a lot about berries in general. They can be poisonous."

Neji looked into Sasuke's eyes now, wondering why there was no smile on his face this time. He decided to let it rest for now, but later on he would ask about Sasuke's strange behaviour.

"..I'm thirsty." He then said.

"That doesn't surprise me, lots of water was removed from your body during the healing." Kiba said, laughing.

"Don't make jokes, get some water." Sasuke hissed at Kiba. He frowned slightly as he looked at Neji. He wasn't sure what to say or do.

"Jeez, chill, you have arms and legs to do that too you know." Kiba said, frowning, but walked away to get water anyway.

"..D-did you bring me h-here?" Neji now asked to Sasuke.

"Kiba did most of the work." Sasuke answered. "His mother figured out you were poisoned and she send us to Tsunade."

"..How come y-you didn't fall ill?" Neji then asked Sasuke.

"I didn't eat them." Sasuke answered.

"...You didn't check if they were p-poisonous or not?" Neji asked, frowning slightly. Didn't Sasuke care what happened to him or something?

"I ate one, but it didn't do anything to me." Sasuke said shrugging. "I figured they were fine."

"Right.." Neji muttered. He didn't know why, but it bothered him. Neji always made sure to look at the texture of the berries, the colour and form. He had been so ill that he just took the berries, thinking Sasuke had checked them, and had blindly trusted Sasuke. Something he wouldn't do anymore in the future from now on. It had almost cost him his life.

Sasuke frowned a little now at Neji's response.

"... What are you thinking?" He asked.

"It's n-nothing." Neji said, as he raised his stiff hand towards his forehead and wiped some sweat away.

Sasuke grabbed a cold rag Tsunade had left and put it on Neji's forehead.

"You were thinking something." He said.

"So?" Neji asked now, giving Sasuke a frown. "Am I s-supposed to share all my t-thoughts with.. hn.. y-you?"

"No.." Sasuke said. "I was just wondering." He muttered something after that and looked away.

Neji looked away as well and stared at the ceiling. Just at that moment Kiba walked into the room, carrying some water with him, and walked over to Neji.

"I got your water." He then said. "Can you help him sit, Sasuke?"

Sasuke sighed and then helped Neji sit up, holding him by the arms. It was the least he could do. He felt confused about a lot of things, but it seemed like his fault that Neji was sick now.

Kiba supported Neji's head and then brought the glass to Neji's lips, helping Neji drink it. You could see the obvious disliking in Neji's eyes, obviously about his current position and condition, but he greedily drank the water out of the glass.

Once Neji was done drinking, Sasuke laid him back down and then without saying anything, he left the room. He needed to think. Badly. And for one of those unexplainable reasons, he had to do it somewhere else, on his own.

* * *

><p>About a week later, Sasuke was waiting outside of Tsunade's house. Neji was now finally completely healthy again so Sasuke and him had decided they would move further. Tsunade's house was not in a city or village, so there was nothing to build up there. Kiba had gone home the day before, having promised his mother he would be back soon again. So Sasuke was standing beside the door on his own, waiting for Neji.<p>

At that moment the door opened and Neji came walking out, but without a word or even a look, he walked past Sasuke and just walked away, into the direction Kiba had pointed them to go to earlier.

Sasuke was taken aback a little, both by Neji appearing and by him just walking off. He quickly followed, frowning deeply.

"Hey, wait up." He said.

Neji just kept on walking as he was carrying his own stuff, and then suddenly looked at Sasuke, with a hard look on his face.

"I think we should go on by ourselves from here on." He then said.

Sasuke looked at Neji confused now.

"Why?" He asked. Why was Neji looking at him like that?

"Because we obviously don't have the same intensions of travelling together." Neji said. "I don't know what you're thinking and why, but I don't like it. I want you to continue on your own now and leave me alone."

".. I don't get it. Since when am I thinking things?" Sasuke asked, not realizing how stupid it sounded. "And I don't know what your intentions are by travelling together, but mine are not getting eaten or attacked or not being able to sleep because there is no one else to take guard."

"What do you want to do, having my 'ghost' watch you at night?" Neji snapped to Sasuke.

"..What?" Sasuke asked, completely confused now, but trying not to look like he was. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh please." Neji said, actually displaying emotion by rolling his eyes now. "Don't tell me you were truly so stupid to not check those berries. I don't know why, but you obviously wanted to kill me."

Sasuke was silent as he stared at Neji in disbelief now. He then spoke again.

"I did not want to kill you and I told that I tried one of those berries and nothing happened." He said.

"I was too ill to think clear but when I started thinking about it a few days ago, I realised that the berries I ate were one of the most dangerous you can eat." Neji snapped. "You would at least have a very bad stomach ache right now, even if you tried one single berry. So I don't know why you're telling those lies, but I don't like it one bit. I blindly trusted you, but this shows me I shouldn't have."

"But I did try one." Sasuke snapped. "How the hell am I supposed to know why it didn't do anything to me? I am not telling you any lies." It pissed him off that Neji thought of him as some kind of killer, but it also gave him another feeling. And frustrating enough, he couldn't place it.

"Just shut your mouth and leave me alone." Neji said. "I don't feel like having you around anymore."

"Well I am not going to leave." Sasuke snapped. "I didn't lie to you, I tried the fucking berry even though I hate them apparently and now you're calling me a murderer? I travelled all over the place to get you better, if I had wanted you dead, I would have left you the second you fainted so that wolves or bears or whatever creatures there are in a forest would eat you."

"Like I said, I don't know what you're thinking." Neji snapped back to Sasuke. He then gave him a push. "Stop following me. I'm going further on my own and that's final." He glared at Sasuke one more time and then walked off.

Sasuke wasn't gonna let Neji go that easily though. He wanted to stick with Neji for God knows what reason, but he was gonna make it happen.

"I am not leaving, I am not trying to kill you and I want to travel with you." He said, still a little snappy.

Neji stopped walking now and looked at Sasuke.

"Sasuke, I want you to leave." He then said. "And you'd better leave. I no longer want you around and like I said before, you'd better not mess with me."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at Neji now. Now 'that' pissed him off for real.

"Shut the fuck up." He hissed. How dare Neji assume he was stronger.

"What, you don't like me telling you that I no longer want you around?" Neji asked, pulling his eyebrows up. "Well it's reality Sasuke. I don't want you around, and that's final." He then walked away from Sasuke once more.

But Sasuke grabbed Neji by the arm and turned him around roughly. He glared at Neji.

"I don't like you assuming you are stronger than me." He snapped. "I don't like you calling me a liar or a murderer and if you think you can survive in the forest on your own, be my guest. I am going to follow you though, because these past days we spend out in the forest together, 'I' was the one who wasn't sleeping and making sure 'you' were gonna stay alive. So I think you owe me an apology."

"You didn't 'want' me to guard us." Neji snapped back, glaring back at Sasuke. "Why on earth do you want to follow me now? And let go of me."

"No." Sasuke snapped. "And I will follow you, because you will find out that you won't be able to do this alone and all I am trying to do is help you and you just throw it away. And no, I didn't want you to guard us, because I found out I barely need sleep and you do."

"Then why do you even bring up the point?" Neji snapped back, now tugging on his arm. "I'm warning you Sasuke, if you don't watch your words, I will make your body unable to move for at least a day so I can get away and we won't see each other ever again."

"I don't want you to call me a liar and I don't know why you got that idea. I want to travel together until we find a place to live and I want to know why in heavensname you got the idea I was trying to kill you. I tried the stupid berry, it didn't do anything and I gave them to you. I didn't know they were poisonous." Sasuke snapped at Neji, still holding onto his arm.

Neji glared at Sasuke now and within just a second, Sasuke's whole body started stiffening up slowly, while Neji snatched his arm loose.

"This is the last time we see each other Sasuke." He then snapped. "Get used to it."

Sasuke looked at Neji now as his whole body started tingling and then it went numb and he dropped to the floor. He couldn't believe this. Neji had actually used his powers on him. After all he had done for that brat he was shoved aside like some kind of criminal. He felt himself getting angrier by the second as he saw Neji leaving. He was laying there for quite a long time, and the anger built up more and more. Until it went dark.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

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><p>Sasuke woke up from what felt like a very, very deep sleep and when he did, he immediately felt a headache coming up. For a few seconds, his vision was blurred and then he realised he wasn't laying down, but he was standing. And with someone in his hands. When he looked at the person in his arms, he saw it was Neji. When did he get to Neji? And how? And why couldn't he remember following him? He looked up to see if there were any clues to make him remember and then saw something else that surprised him. He saw that same man, with the glasses, smirking at him. And then he was gone. Sasuke frowned and looked at Neji once again. He was hurt pretty badly. That man was probably responsible and Sasuke felt worry overtake him. He laid Neji down and tried wakening him up. When Neji didn't respond, Sasuke checked his breathing. But there was none. He panicked completely now and did the only thing he could think off. He started giving Neji mouth to mouth. Neji couldn't die.<p>

It didn't take long before Neji's eyes flew open and he quickly sucked in as much air as possible. As he pushed Sasuke away he sat up, gasping for air and coughing. Seeing the bruised spots on Neji's neck, it was obvious that the man had tried to strangle him.

Sasuke rubbed a hand over Neji's back and looked at him, a hint of worry in his eyes. He wasn't sure what to do now, but he was relieved Neji at least breathed again.

Neji swallowed and coughed a few times before he looked at Sasuke, panting.

"..W-where did he go?" He then asked. He felt a relief going over him the moment he said it. Sasuke was innocent. If Sasuke had wanted him to die, he wouldn't give him mouth to mouth to bring him back to breath. He had judged him wrong, so it seemed.

"I don't know, he disappeared." Sasuke said. "Don't talk until you can breathe normally." He held Neji up, seeing Neji was not really able to focus on it.

Neji took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down his breathing. He then was silent for some time, as he held a hand on his chest.

"..Sorry Sasuke." He then said.

Sasuke frowned now, confused by that comment.

"For what?" He asked. "Are you ok?"

"For attacking you and leaving you behind." Neji said, shrugging. "And for not trusting you while you saved my life."

Sasuke was silent for a while.

"It's ok, I guess you would think that of me after having been poisoned by the berries I picked." He then said.

"It still wasn't really nice." Neji said, shrugging. "I should have trusted you."

"Yes you should have. But it's fine. We're fine. You're alive." Sasuke said, letting out a breath he had been holding. Neji was alive.

"Alright, that's good.." Neji said, nodding. "I wonder why that guy attacked me though."

"It was that man with the glasses." Sasuke said.

"Is that an answer?" Neji asked, giving Sasuke a slight frown.

"No. But that's important information. He knows me, maybe he thought you still had something to do with me." Sasuke answered.

"It's weird though." Neji said. "Why would he want to kill me?"

"I don't know." Sasuke said, shaking his head. "I really don't. But I know I need to find him."

"..It's obvious he knows something yes." Neji said with a slight frown.

"He knows me. It's important for me to find him." Sasuke said.

"We should watch out though." Neji said. "He was strangling me until I passed out."

"I know. I have a feeling he won't kill me though." Sasuke said.

"Perhaps not." Neji said. "Let's hope he won't."

"He won't, because if he wanted to, he could kill me now. I don't have powers, or at least don't know how to use them." Sasuke said. "Are you ok to walk?"

"Yeah I can walk." Neji said, nodding. "Thanks for coming into saving though."

"You're welcome." Sasuke said and nodded, getting up. "We should get out of here, who knows who can come and attack us now."

Neji got up as well and wiped the dirt off of his clothes.

"Alright, let's go."

They started walking now and after a while of silence, Sasuke spoke up.

"..So... what day is it?" He asked carefully.

"What, now?" Neji asked, looking at Sasuke as he pulled an eyebrow up.

"Yeah. What day is it?" Sasuke asked again, looking away from Neji, pretending to see something interesting.

"...Tuesday." Neji said. After some time he turned his look away as well, focussing on the road. "According to Tsunade, in three hours we will see the next city."

Sasuke was silent now, deep in thought. It was Tuesday. So he had no memory of a full day this time. What was going on with him?

They walked further a little longer, and after an hour, they walked past a lake. Neji looked at it and then stopped.

"Do you mind if I wash myself for some time?" He then asked. "I haven't done it in some days and I start to feel dirty. And I like my privacy, so as long as we don't have a living place I don't want to do this in a public bath."

".. Sure, but I need to wash myself too. I think. And I once again need new clothes. Damn." Sasuke hadn't even noticed that his clothes were torn again. What did he do, battle every creature that had crossed his path?

"Right." Neji said, frowning a little, as he walked to the lake. "What did you do this time?" He pulled off his shirt now and put off his shoes.

"... I can't remember what I did last time, don't say it like I did something wrong." Sasuke said, avoiding the question just slightly as he pulled off his torn clothes.

"I didn't say it like that." Neji said as he slid down his pants and underwear. Now naked, he walked into the lake and took his clothes with him. He then started washing his clothes first.

Sasuke was silent for a while as he looked at Neji's body. He seemed so pure, even though his city has been destroyed and he probably had to fight once in a while. Sasuke looked at his own body, which had plenty of scars on it and then looked at Neji again. And he stared, his shirt still over his arms, hanging loosely in his hands.

Neji scrubbed some dirt off of his pants and shirt, and then noticed Sasuke was taking long with getting undressed. He looked up to Sasuke and was a little caught off guard to see him naked and staring intensely at him.

"...Aren't you coming into the water?" Neji asked, after he had swallowed once. He never expected Sasuke to be this muscular and have a body that told a history of who he was. It looked like Sasuke had been through some hard times. But even behind all of that, there was a gorgeous boy standing in front of him... he wouldn't deny that for sure.

Sasuke looked at Neji for a while, and then his head shook slightly and he threw his shirt to the ground and walked into the water.

".. Yeah. Sorry, lost in thought." He mumbled as he washed himself.

Neji gave Sasuke one more look, before he continued washing his clothes.

"No one attacked you when your body was paralyzed, right?" Neji asked, a hint of guilt in his voice. He was obviously referring to Sasuke's torn clothes now.

Sasuke looked at Neji once again and was silent once more. He had to stop staring at that gorgeous body.

"... No." He said. "Not that I can remember." His look then changed from mesmerized to slight shock. Shit, now Neji would know he had lost his memory for a part again.

Neji send Sasuke a frown now.

"Did you lose your memory again?" He asked. Sadly, he was very sharp, so he had heard Sasuke's little mistake and immediately had come to the right conclusion.

"... Well I wouldn't say I lost my memory... completely." Sasuke mumbled, looking away. Damn it.

"But you lost a part." Neji said. "..That's strange."

".. Yeah, a day." Sasuke said. ".. It just went black and when I 'woke up', so to speak, I had you in my arms and that guy with the glasses was smirking at me." He washed his chest now, letting the water drip down his body. It felt good to clean up.

"That's really weird." Neji said, frowning once more. "You should have asked Tsunade about it."

"Well it didn't happen when I was there and when I woke up I was already here with you." Sasuke said. "How come you don't have any scars?" He now asked, not caring that Neji now knew he had been looking at his body.

"I heal very fast." Neji explained. "And I take care of myself a lot, so I know how to remove them."

"It would be nice not to have so many scars." Sasuke said and then washed his hair.

"Perhaps I could take care of some of them." Neji said. "I will make some ointments."

"You can actually do that?" Sasuke asked frowning.

"Yes I can." Neji said, nodding. "Like I said, I do have some knowledge of healing, and especially of the human body."

"When can you do that then?" Sasuke asked.

Neji grinned a little.

"My, do you want a beauty treatment as soon as possible?" He then asked.

"Shut up. I would just like to get rid of this scarred body." Sasuke said, a little snappy.

"Well I probably won't be able to make your skin look like mine, but.. I will do my best for you soon." Neji said, shrugging.

"I don't need it to be that way, I like some scars. Just not to be covered in them. Maybe my past self loved them, but I can't remember anyhow." Sasuke said. "So when will you do it?"

"Sasuke, don't be so impatient." Neji said, as he walked towards the shore again and put his clothes down, to let them dry.

Sasuke was silent as he stared once again, this time at Neji's very well curved butt. That really was a nice butt. He apparently was very gay. Another thing he had found out about himself right now.

Neji made sure his clothes could dry and then walked back into the lake, while washing himself.

"So I guess we should head on soon again." He then said. "It might be dangerous to stay here for too long."

Sasuke didn't reply as he had just seen Neji's... parts. And they looked good as well. And it made him stare once again, this time it was pretty obvious what he was staring at though.

Neji brought some water to his face and washed it, and when he looked at Sasuke he caught him staring.. at his crouch.

"...Is there something wrong?" Neji asked, his face flushing red immediately. Would Sasuke be staring because he had like.. zero body hair? Something he had been ashamed of his whole life?

"Not at all.." Sasuke replied without thinking but then realised what he had said and looked away. "I mean.. I just.. I... oh crap." He mumbled the last thing.

Neji then for once had no idea what to say. He just stared at Sasuke. What on earth was going on?

"I think I'm done washing myself." Sasuke said and quickly moved to the side of the lake and pulled himself out of the water.

"...I'll hurry." Neji said, focussing his eyes on his own body now. He was a little confused though. Why had Sasuke been staring.. at his crotch?

"You do that." Sasuke said as he tried drying himself a little and then just pulled on his clothes again. "It's just a two hour walk now right?"

"Yes it is." Neji confirmed while nodding. He then washed himself in silence. Once more, he had no idea what to say.

When Sasuke was completely dressed he looked at Neji and waited for him to finish. He had to stop staring at Neji's body. There was no time to think about bodies and... stuff. He had to find out who he was first.

* * *

><p>Three hours later, Sasuke and Neji walked into the city Tsunade had told them about before. Sasuke looked around. It looked like an ok city. Not something he would want to live in though. Sasuke opened his mouth to say something, but before he had the chance to, he was smacked down onto the ground, face first and all he felt was a whole lot of weight on his back. When he wanted to turn around and hit whoever managed to catch him off guard, he felt a lick on his face and he felt disgusted by it. When he looked up with a look that could kill, he saw a wolf, grinning broadly at him.<p>

"... Kiba." He mumbled.  
>"Heya." Kiba said, as he jumped off of Sasuke and smirked at Neji, who was giving him an amused look. "How are you folks doing?"<p>

Sasuke got up and wiped his face.

"Great." He said sarcastic. "Did you have to jump on me?"

"To catch you off guard I obviously had to." Kiba said, once more grinning. "It's always nice to smash an asshole like you onto the ground." Neji let out a chuckle now, as he shook his head. What an idiot. Kiba really knew how to lighten the mood. Since what happened in the lake, Sasuke and him had been awkward around each other and they had barely spoken. It would be good to have the cheerful half wolf around for a while.

"Since when am I an asshole, you're the one smashing my head into the ground and then licking me. Now I need another bath." Sasuke said smirking. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"A dog's tongue is cleaner then water." Kiba said, shrugging. "I decided to travel around a little bit and after some time I guessed it would be good to travel with you guys for some time. I could try to help you to find a new home."

"Well thanks. And even if your tongue is cleaner, keep it to yourself from now on." Sasuke said.

"Sasuke has been a little grumpy for some time." Neji told Kiba, when he saw the confused look on Kiba's face.

"I think he's just being his own asshole self." Kiba said, once more giving Sasuke a smirk. Neji pulled up an eyebrow. He wondered if provoking Sasuke was a good idea. But on the other hand, Kiba was still in his wolf form. No person with normal brains would attack a wolf.

Sasuke gave Kiba a slight glare before sighing.

"I am not grumpy." He told Neji. "I think we need to decide what we're going to do in this city. I don't think I want to live here."

"What are your requirements then?" Neji asked Sasuke, slightly frowning. "We didn't even look around yet and you already came to this conclusion."

"It just doesn't feel like a place I would want to live." Sasuke said shrugging. "We need a place to sleep here though, so we'd better start with looking for that."

"Why do the effort?" Kiba asked Sasuke. "Do you even have money? Else it's effortless. You could try to make money, or we sleep somewhere and take guard once in a while."

"I need to sleep." Sasuke said. "We managed to find a place to sleep in a village that looked a lot less pleasant then this one, I'm sure we can do that here too."

"We could try it yes." Kiba said. "Nothing is wrong with trying."

"Right. And if it won't work we can always sleep somewhere and take hold in turns. Could you say something too Neji?" Sasuke asked.

"I'm thinking." Neji answered. "I don't know if it would be smart." Kiba pulled up an eyebrow now. Why was Neji against the idea?

"You don't want to sleep in someone else's house then?" Kiba asked.

"It's not polite to use the houses of other's and give nothing in return." Neji replied.

"That just sounds wrong. Why do you always sound so wrong?" Sasuke asked, frowning slightly. "It worked out fine last time didn't it?"

Neji gave Sasuke a look and then continued to look at the city.

"He didn't appreciate us staying there for free." He then said. "In fact, he was angry. What if something like that happens and we're staying in the house of someone who happens to be very powerful? It's not polite and it's dangerous."

"He wasn't angry. Well he was, but only because of me." Sasuke said frowning.

"You were right Sasuke, he did want sex." Neji then said. Now Kiba frowned as well. For some kind of reason, he felt like he should take a step back and allow Sasuke and Neji some minutes together. There was something going on that needed to be spoken of, obviously.

"... You said nothing happened." Sasuke said, frowning even more. "What did he do to you? You should have told me so I could kick his ass for it."

"He came to our room and tried to undress me and touch me." Neji said, coming across like he wasn't bothered by the previous happenings at all. "He did, while I told him to stop. In the end I was forced to take over his body and slightly hurt him. He became furious and tried again, but I hurt him another time. He then left, after he had told me we had to leave immediately after breakfast the next morning."

"... Well you should have told me about that." Sasuke snapped. "How come I didn't hear any of that? I was sleeping right next to you."

"I have no idea, it was like you were unconscious." Neji said, as he now looked at Sasuke. "I checked up on you, but you were just in a very deep sleep."

"Oh.. Well you should have told me, you can't keep those things to yourself." Sasuke said, annoyed Neji had pretended nothing had happened. And annoyed he hadn't woken up to help him.

"Nothing serious happened, except for the fact he broke my trust." Neji answered. "I don't see any reason why I should have told you."

"Well maybe because I asked you and you lied to me." Sasuke said. "We're still going to ask for a place to stay though."

"Funny that I don't want it anymore and now you do, we switched roles." Neji commented, crossing his arms.

"Yeah well, I need to sleep." Sasuke said. "And I need to sleep well, and I slept well when we had a bed. So I need a bed."

"So you are the one who's going to get us some sleeping space, Sasuke?" Kiba asked, who butted in to the conversation Sasuke and Neji were having. Neji gave Sasuke a long look while Kiba was talking, and then, once more, he broke the eye contact and looked away.

Sasuke was silent for a while and then spoke up.

"Fine I will." He said and walked into the city. Those two pissed him off for some reason. Especially Neji.

Kiba chose to follow Sasuke now and after a while, Neji did as well. He kept his distance though. Just like every time he spoke to Sasuke, he wondered why the raven was this hot headed and hateful to others.

Sasuke took a left at the first inn he saw and stormed inside. He walked to the owner.

"We need a place to stay, we don't have any money and we're not going to have sex with anyone. Can we get a room?" He asked, his tone betrayed that he was irritated.

The bartender, a man of age with messy dark hair and a grey moustache narrowed his eyes behind the glasses he was wearing, and leaned forwards over the bar, so he could look at Sasuke.

"That you even have the nerve to ask is a wonder, young man." He answered. Neji and Kiba walked into the inn as well now. As Kiba walked inside, Neji chose to wait in the doorpost. He did not feel like standing up for Sasuke again and trying to solve the situation. It was time for Sasuke to find out that with this behaviour, he made no one happy.

"Why, what were you gonna do about it? Either you lend us a room or you're not and we'll ask someone else." Sasuke said shrugging. He wasn't scared of this man.

The man now pulled up an eyebrow.

"Why would I want to do something about something?" He then asked. "From my first answer you should already have guessed the answer is no. The way you march inside and what you ask is something no one would say yes to." Neji looked up now. He looked at the man, who didn't seem angry, nor dangerous. He was simply offended by Sasuke. This could be a chance.

"And what if we offer your clients healing and reki sessions tonight and tomorrow morning?" He then asked. This lead the bartender to look up as well.

"If you are looking for a room for a longer time, we could use someone who could do that." He then said. "I'm sure my boss would give the three of you a room in exchange for taking better care of our customers."

Sasuke gave Neji a glare now, but kept his mouth shut. Neji just had to butt in with his reki and healing thingies. What an asshole.

"We're not staying here for a longer time." He said to Neji.

"Well I am, because for now, I'm tired of travelling and I'm going to make some money, before I continue travelling." Neji said, narrowing his eyes. "Shut your mouth for once, stop ruining things and get that glare off of your face. I'm sick of you and your impossibly childish behaviour."

Sasuke looked at Neji now, his glare not fading at all. He then shoved Neji aside and stormed past him, out of the inn. How dare Neji say something like that. What kind of thank you was that for saving his ass for the last few days.

"Are you going to stay here and offer us these healings for our customers or not?" The bartender of the inn asked.

"If your boss allows it, I'd love to." Neji said. "If we could get a room for three for tonight, it would be very nice."

"I will talk to the boss, once he gets here. If you can come back in thirty minutes I will know more." The bartender said.

Neji nodded thankfully to the man.

"We will, thank you." He then said. "We will be back soon." After the bartender had said goodbye as well, Neji and Kiba left the inn and walked outside. Only to stumble upon Sasuke fighting with a guy they didn't know.

Sasuke was apparently winning, giving the guy a hit in the face and glaring at him.

"Just fuck off will ya." He snapped to the guy and then spotted Neji and Kiba from the corner of his eye. He looked at them and then saw the look on Neji's face. It was almost a look of disgust and aversion. Sasuke felt bad now for starting a fight with someone. He didn't need Neji looking at him like that.

Neji looked at Sasuke for some longer, before turning away and leaving the scene. He was done with Sasuke. He didn't want to see him anymore, he decided. Even now he had found a place to live for a while, he'd rather leave Sasuke behind now. He couldn't stand the guy any longer.

Sasuke pushed away the guy, that now tried to hit him, and then quickly followed Neji, grabbing him by the arm.

"Neji." Was all he said. He wasn't quite sure what he should say.

Neji just yanked his arm loose and continued walking, not even looking at Sasuke. He didn't waste a word or a look on the raven. He just kept walking, distancing himself from the other.

But Sasuke wasn't just gonna let Neji walk off. He followed Neji once more and grabbed his arm more firmly.

"What was with that look?" He asked.

"Sasuke, let go of me." Neji said, as he was forced to stop walking.

"No. Why did you look at me like that?" Sasuke asked.

"Spare your breath, I don't want to talk to you anymore." Neji suddenly snapped. He then looked at Sasuke and gave him a glare. "You're making me sick. I never met someone who's this much of an asshole."

"Why am I an asshole?" Sasuke asked, trying to act like it didn't bother what Neji had just said. It did bother him though. A lot.

"You're selfish, you're ignorant, you're mean, you manipulate people, you act like a spoiled kid, you're hot headed and you're easily offended." Neji snapped. "Overall, the only good thing you did is save my life and take guard at night. But that's obviously not something you normally would do either, since you keep bringing it up and expect me to be nice to you and do whatever you want, because you did 'something' nice. I should keep my mouth shut because you saved me, I should not have an opinion and not go in against you. I should stay with you, listen to whatever you want me to do, and all of that because you saved me. If you despise things like that so much, let me rot the next time, because I refuse to be around you any longer."

Sasuke looked at Neji now. He didn't feel like he had been that much of an asshole at all. He had tried to keep it in. So how come Neji was so pissed off with him? He wasn't sure what to say now.

"You could also tell me immediately that you hate me." Neji now spat.

Sasuke frowned now.

"... I don't hate you." He said. He didn't understand where that came from.

"Sure Sasuke." Neji snapped. "You do everything to piss me off, every idea I have is not good enough according to you, if I can pull something off you can't appreciate it because of your immature way of handling things and you suddenly don't want it anymore, you're never nice to me and all you do is snap."

"That's not true." Sasuke said. "I don't do things to piss you off. And I am nice to you. No I'm not mister nice guy, but neither are you. You're the one who's always pissing me off with your emotionless blabbering and calling me a liar and what not. I can't believe you even dare to say those things about me and then tell 'me' I'm not nice to 'you'."

"The only time I called you a liar was with the berries, and I apologized for that." Neji snapped to Sasuke. "If you can't stand my emotionless 'blabbering', why are you still talking to me? It's how I am. I barely talk and I don't like expressing emotions. It's not an excuse to make up for your behaviour."

"I never said it was. And just now you called me lots of things." Sasuke snapped back now. "If you were such a good person, you wouldn't call me all those things without even knowing me. Because you can't possibly know me, because I don't even know who I am. So excuse me if I'm not exactly nice all the time."

"I never said I was a good person." Neji snapped. "I said that 'I' can't stand you anymore, and I decided to break contact. And you wanted to know why and I told you. So goodbye Sasuke, you can hang out with Kiba from now on." He once more freed his arm and walked into the direction of the exit from the city. It was obvious that Neji was pissed off for real.

Sasuke followed Neji once more.

"You can't possibly be for real. You're a pretty rotten person if you're just going to break contact like that. I've been nice to you, the only times I wasn't nice was with an inn owner, a bartender and a weirdo who wanted to have sex with you." He said.

"One more comment and I'm going to freeze your body." Neji snapped, as he kept walking.

"Oh that again? Is that all you can do? Knock my body out? And then you call me an asshole. If anyone has the right to be mad at someone, it's me, at you. If I am such a bad person, then how come I forgave you for being an asshole to me? How come I forgave you that you called me a liar and then you attacked me? And trust me, if I hated you, I wouldn't have stuck around for so long." Sasuke snapped.

Neji stopped walking now and glared holes into the tree.

"So you forgiving me for my mistakes is what makes you call yourself a nice person?" He then asked.

"It's what makes me a nice person to you." Sasuke said. "Besides, apart from being annoyed by some other guys and telling you what to do a few times, what did I ever do to you?"

"The whole list I told you when you asked me that question before." Neji snapped. "If there is no possible reason for me to be angry with you, then why would I be more pissed off because of you then I've ever been in my whole life?"

"How the hell am I supposed to know, I'm not you." Sasuke snapped. "You're a complete mystery to me anyway."

"Perhaps because I'm in mind at least three hundred years older then you are." Neji answered. "I guess I forgot how to act around people who react on certain situations like five year olds."

Sasuke was silent as he tried not to look hurt.

"Now who's deliberately trying to piss the other off." He snapped, although it came out a little weaker than he had hoped for.

"This is actually the first time I am hurting you on purpose." Neji said. "And that should be a clear sign for you that you should fuck off right now."

"Yeah because telling my I'm selfish, ignorant, manipulate people and act like a child wasn't supposed to hurt me right? Telling me I was a liar and a murderer wasn't supposed to hurt me." Sasuke snapped. "You know what Neji, 'you' can just fuck off because I am sick of you. I've saved your butt, I've been nice to you, I've stuck by you even when you didn't want me to and all I get in return is you hating me. So if that's the way you are, then please, do fuck off and stay the hell away out of my life. I obviously misjudged you and wasted my time."

"I certainly will, goodbye Sasuke." Neji said and for the third time in their conversation, he walked off without giving Sasuke another look. Without answering one of Sasuke's questions. He obviously thought it was not worth it.

Sasuke looked at Neji and then on the spur of the moment, he picked up a rock and threw it to Neji. He didn't know why and in the time he did it, he was out of control, but he did it.

The stone hit Neji on the shoulder and Neji stopped walking. He stood still for a moment before storming back to Sasuke and giving him a hard hit across the cheek, that made Sasuke's head snap aside.

Sasuke turned his head to Neji again, about to hit him back, but then saw something he hadn't expected. Neji's eyes were actually filled with tears. And Sasuke didn't know what to anymore. Why was Neji looking like he was about to cry?

Neji looked at him for some time, before walking past Sasuke and hurrying himself away from the raven, into the direction of the village this time. He clenched his arms around his body to try to pinch away the stinging pain in his stomach that had come up some minutes ago. He was showing too much emotion, he realised as his knuckles were turning white. He had expected too much. Far too much.

Sasuke was still not sure what to do for a few seconds, but then turned around and followed Neji again. He turned him around and looked at him.

"... I'm sorry, you're right. I am an asshole." He said. It was all he could think off.

"Don't say those things just because you saw tears." Neji said as he quickly pushed Sasuke away and turned around again, so Sasuke could not see the tears that were now going down his face. He quickly started wiping them away.

"I'm not, I'm really sorry. I don't want to hurt you." Sasuke said and did something he himself hadn't expected either. He grabbed Neji's hand.

Neji immediately stiffened up completely now Sasuke touched him. But he didn't snatch his hand away. He was silent as he tried to stop the sobs that were coming up in his throat. He felt the pain in his stomach becoming worse and just when he realised it, he also realised that he couldn't breathe anymore.

Sasuke turned Neji around now, and grabbed him by the arms.

"I didn't mean to hurt you..." He said again, and frowned a little when he saw Neji. What was with him?

Neji frowned as he grabbed to his chest, while he frantically tried to breath. The pain started to become maddening and he felt his heart started to beat faster as well. He tried to relax, to bring himself back to normal, but it was like something was blocking his lungs.  
>Sasuke frowned even more now as he saw Neji like that. And he slightly panicked.<p>

".. What's wrong? You have to breathe Neji." He said, and then let go of Neji quickly, as if he was the cause that Neji couldn't breathe right now.

Neji grabbed Sasuke's arm instead to support himself, as he shook his head.

"..C-can't breathe.." He gasped, while he was still gasping for air.

Sasuke's head was spiralling out of control for a while, before he did the only thing he could think off. He pulled Neji into a hug and rubbed his back softly.

"Just calm down... calm down Neji. Breathe." Sasuke softly said.

Neji kept on frowning as he tried to relax. First nothing happened and he started to feel dizzy because of lack of air, but slowly, he felt the pressure on his lungs becoming less and as he kept gasping, he could gulp in some air. Which made him panic even more, he tried to get in as much as air as possible.

"Don't do that, you have to do it calmly Neji. So calm down." Sasuke softly said. It was a weird feeling though, holding Neji like this. It freaked him out.

Neji gripped Sasuke's arms tightly and closed his eyes, trying to relax. He felt the sobbing coming up again but when he tried suppressing them another time, he felt the pressure getting heavier. So then he chose to let it out and be weak and he started sobbing. Immediately he started breathing again. The moment he realised he was crying he quickly let go of Sasuke and backed away. What on earth had just happened?

Sasuke looked at Neji, worried that something would happen to him again.

".. Don't cry." He said.

"..I.. I j-just have to be alone for some time now." Neji muttered, as he shook his head, wiping his tears while he still tried to breathe normally. "..Can you tell the guy f-from the inn I'm coming back later?"

"You're not leaving then?" Sasuke asked, confused now.

Neji shook his head now. He then walked further into the village. Showing tears to people was not something he liked. In fact, he hated it.

Sasuke looked at Neji leaving and then quickly put up his normal, slightly irritated face. He then decided to let this rest for a while, so he went to the inn's bartender and did as he was told. But this whole ordeal bugged him. And not just a little. He wondered why Neji had lost his breath. Was it him?


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

* * *

><p>"So Kiba, couldn't your mom lend you some money so you could get by while you were travelling?" Sasuke asked. He was laying on a bed, next to Kiba's. Neji's bed was on the other side, but he was doing healings. The owner of the inn had allowed them to rent the room in return of Neji spending time healing their customers. Sasuke wasn't fond of that idea, but he didn't wanna go in against Neji anymore.<p>

"We don't even have money, we build all of our food ourselves." Kiba said, shrugging, as he rolled over to look at Sasuke. "Most of the time we're in our wolf forms, so we don't need a lot."

"So what do you do then, hunt?" Sasuke asked. "Because I am starving, I figured this room would come with some food."

"I thought it was, but I didn't need any." Kiba said. "Perhaps Neji will bring some. And yeah, we hunt, and like I said, we build all of our food ourselves."

"Right." Sasuke said nodding. "What do you think of Neji?"

"What do you mean?" Kiba asked, looking at Sasuke.

"Just how I said it, what do you think of Neji." Sasuke repeated.

"...Well it's a good guy, he's working now to give us some safety, but he creeps me out sometimes." Kiba said. "It's like the guy has no emotions. You can barely find them on his face, to not even start about his dead looking eyes."

"He doesn't have dead looking eyes." Sasuke said. "And he has emotions, he just doesn't show them." Why was he defending Neji?

"Perhaps, I don't know him." Kiba said, shrugging. "But come on Sasuke. His eyes are white. White. That's not really bursting with life."

"Well my eyes are black." Sasuke said. "They're like death, way more than Neji's."

Kiba pulled his eyebrow up a little amused now.

"Are we getting defensive and protective?" He asked Sasuke with a grin on his face.

"What? No." Sasuke said, not looking at Kiba. "I was just saying..." At that moment, the door opened and Neji walked in. Sasuke chose to keep his mouth shut.

Neji didn't look at them as he walked into the room and walked directly to his bed. He undressed until he was only wearing his underwear and then got into the bed. He didn't admit to them he was tired, but both Sasuke as Kiba could spot the bangs under Neji's eyes.

"Did it go well?" Sasuke carefully asked. He wasn't sure how Neji felt about him right now.

"Yeah.. it were a lot." Neji said, as he put the covers over himself. "I hope both of you don't mind, but I'm going to sleep already."

"That's fine, I need to sleep as well. Nothing happened though right?" Sasuke asked Neji.

"No, it was fine." Neji's almost immediate response came.

".. Ok then. Goodnight." Sasuke said as he pulled off his clothes and got into bed. He looked at Neji though.

Neji turned onto his side and then closed his eyes.

"Goodnight." He said. Kiba mumbled something about sweet dreams as well, before it got quiet in the room. Until the guys started snoring softly.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Sasuke woke up from another deep sleep. It took a while before he remembered that he was actually sleeping in a bed. He sat up, expecting to see Kiba and Neji sleeping in their beds as well. Instead, Neji's bed was already made and Kiba's was... just empty. Sasuke frowned and quickly pulled on his clothes, before going downstairs. There, he saw Neji and Kiba eating. Sasuke walked to the table and sat down as well.<p>

"Well good morning, you could have woken me up." He said.

"We thought you were dead man, I even punched you and you didn't flinch." Kiba said, giving Sasuke a smirk. "Mister prick even yelled in your ear to wake up, but obviously you liked being in dream world a little too much. Had a good sleep?"

"You punched me?" Sasuke asked frowning. He should have woken up from that right? "No wonder my cheek feels numb."

"Yeah, it was a miracle you didn't wake up." Kiba said as he pushed his empty plate away, while Neji wasn't even halfway with the bowl of rice he was eating. "I decided to go look for a job so we got some money for if we start travelling again, so I guess I'll be taking my leave now. I'll ask the guy for some breakfast for you on my way there. You wanna drink milk or water?"

"Milk." Sasuke said nodding. He then looked at Neji, who hadn't said a word yet. "Did you sleep well?" He asked.

Neji nodded as he took another bite. After he had swallowed, he looked at Sasuke.

"Did you?" He then asked, while Kiba left the table.

"Well obviously, since you couldn't wake me up. That's the second time that happened." Sasuke said. To be honest, he only slept two times and both of those times he wasn't woken up by 'anything'.

"You don't feel sick right?" Neji asked. He took his cup of tea now and took a sip, coming across more calm than ever.

"No I don't." Sasuke answered. "... About feeling sick, what happened to you yesterday?"

Neji was silent for some time, as if he was thinking about the question. He took another sip, and just when Sasuke wanted to ask again, he got the answer. "...I guess I had some issues with myself." Neji then replied.

"... What kind of issues?" Sasuke asked, frowning a little. That was a weird answer. Sure, everyone had issues with themselves sometimes, but to almost get a heart attack from it was taking it to a whole new level.

"Expressing emotions has never been my strongest point." Neji answered, as he shrugged.

"Well that's not something new, what kind of answer is that?" Sasuke asked, confused now.

"Don't tell me you didn't see what was happening." Neji said, as he pulled up an eyebrow.

"Well you were crying, but that didn't mean you had to stop breathing." Sasuke said.

Neji shrugged.

"Let's talk about something else." He then said.

"Why? Was it something I did? If so, you have to tell me." Sasuke said stubborn as always.

"Like I said, I have issues with myself, nothing to worry about." Neji said with a slight sigh.

"... Fine." Sasuke said as his food was served and nodded to the waitress. "So how long are you planning on staying here?" He asked Neji, once the waitress was gone.

"I don't know, until I spared some money I think." Neji said. "Do you already know where you are going?"

"I'm not going anywhere until you and Kiba are done." Sasuke answered as he started eating. Man he was hungry.

"I thought you said you were not going to stay here longer then a night." Neji said, pulling up an eyebrow.

"Yeah well that was my plan, but then both of you decided you wanted to work here for a while." Sasuke said shrugging.

"Why do you want to keep on travelling so badly?" Neji asked.

"Because I wanna know who I am, and I'm pretty sure I'm not going to find that out here." Sasuke said.

"You don't know that by running into a village, sleep there and running out again." Neji said. "Remember that we met the guy with the glasses in an inn you originally didn't even want to go to?"

"Yeah but I don't see him here. And the second time we saw him in a forest. I just think I need to find the right city. I'm sure that guy isn't the only one who knows who I am." Sasuke said.

Neji looked at Sasuke with a frown now.

"...Are you this stupid?" He then asked. Was Sasuke really this slow that he didn't get the point at all?

".. Excuse me?" Sasuke asked, frowning slightly as well.

"You don't get what I'm saying at all Sasuke." Neji said. "I mean to say that we met someone who knows stuff about you or can help you in your life, even in places you didn't want to go to. If it hadn't been for me, you would have never met the guy. Perhaps someone will show up in here. Plus, there are more people than just that guy that know things about you. I assume."

"Yeah but I am not going to wait around for someone to travel by here." Sasuke said. "So I need to find that guy with the glasses, because there might be a chance that I won't find any other person who knows me."

"You have no idea where those people live and where they travel to." Neji said. "The chance is just as big that you will meet someone here as that you meet someone a little further away. We're walking further and further from the city we met someone who knows you. It's a wonder you didn't ask around if someone knew this guy."

"Well I'm not that smart apparently." Sasuke said, slightly annoyed. "If you wanna live here the rest of your life, then tell me."

"I don't, I just want to make some money and rest from our journey and the happenings from before." Neji said. "It's not like I absorbed the death of all of my friends and family members yet."

"Well fine, I already said that I was ok with that. But you sounded like you didn't want to travel at all anymore." Sasuke said.

"Perhaps that's what you assumed out of your worry." Neji said, shrugging. "We will find out more about you, ok. But for now, I want to stay here for some time."

"Fine. And I wasn't worried." Sasuke said as he took his last bite of his breakfast. "So am I supposed to find a job as well?"

"If you want." Neji said. "It would be best I think."

"Fine." Sasuke said. "I might as well make some money now that I'm stuck here."

"You're not stuck here Sasuke." Neji corrected Sasuke.

"Whatever. Better go and find a job then. See you later." Sasuke said and got up. He felt like he was stuck here, even though all he had to do was leave if he wanted to. He just couldn't leave without Neji. And that was so irritating.

"Oh my god, is that you, Sasuke?" Sasuke had been walking around for some time, in search of a job, when he was suddenly disturbed from his thoughts by the shriek of a woman. When he turned around, curious because he had heard his name, he saw a thin woman standing in front of him with red spiky hair that reached her waist, glasses and a look of adoration in her eyes. Whoever this was, she knew Sasuke.

Sasuke was silent for a while as he let the sense of feeling this woman was familiar wash over him and then he walked back to this woman.

"Who are you? Do you know me?" Sasuke asked, his brow furrowed slightly.

The woman now had a look of shock on her face, as she stared at Sasuke.

"I'm Karin, I can't believe you forgot about me!" She said. "You suddenly disappeared, what happened? And what are you doing in this town?"

"Karin..." Sasuke said, narrowing his eyes slightly. That did sound familiar. Like he had said it before. But what was that about suddenly disappearing? "How do you know me?"

"Well you used to come to my village during your training, and we were hanging out some time." Karin said, as she twirled some hair around her fingers. "Why won't you come home with me? You could ask me questions there." She gave Sasuke a flirty look now while letting out a seductive giggle.

Sasuke frowned a little. Was this girl hitting on him? He would just ignore that for now.

"Just tell me what you know about me." Sasuke said.

"..Did you lose your memory?" Karin now asked, a look of worry on her face.

".. Yes I did. So tell me everything you know." Sasuke said, this time sounding sterner. He needed to know what this girl knew about him.

"Well around three years ago you first appeared in the village, searching for new clothes." Karin said. "You told me you were training somewhere near but never told me anything about your master or your past. We were hanging out some time and I found out that you are very strong and have a lot of magical powers, and they became even stronger throughout the years. Not even two months ago you suddenly disappeared."

"Who was I training with? And where did you live, here?" Sasuke asked. "What kind of powers did I have?" So he did have powers. He knew he couldn't be as hopeless as he had been the past few weeks.

"I said you never told me who your trainer was." Karin said, sighing. "I lived in a village two days walking from here. And you have many different powers Sasuke. Your biggest power was the ability to call up and control fire."

"... I can do that?" Sasuke asked, frowning. "What is the name of that city? Did I live there or did I just pass by?"

"You just came there every once in a while." Karin replied, tucking some hair back behind her ear. "The city is called Ira."

"Why are you here then?" Sasuke asked. "And what other powers do I have? You need to tell me."

"I just moved." Karin said. "Sasuke, I have no idea how many powers you have. You barely used them. I only saw you lit a candle once, but you kept on telling me you were really strong."

"Well that sucks, you should have asked me to show you." Sasuke said annoyed. "So do you know where I came from?"

"I asked you but you never told me." Karin said. She then sighed. "Why don't we have a nicer talk? You're only repeating questions." She said in a whiney voice.

"Well sorry for wanting to know who I am. You can just tell me everything you know, then I wouldn't have to ask." Sasuke said annoyed.

"Actually, that's all you ever told me." Karin said, slightly blushing as she looked at the handsome man in front of her.

"So all I told you was that I was training and that I had powers? You must not have been someone I cared about." Sasuke said.

Karin was silent for some time as she kept on looking at Sasuke.

"...You also told me you cared about nobody." She then said. "That you could love nobody, except for one person. Your brother."

Sasuke was silent now as well as he looked at Karin. So he had a brother? And apparently that had been the only one he had trusted.

".. So who is my brother then?" He asked.

"You refused to talk about your brother too." Karin said.

Sasuke looked at Karin a little longer. God was he really that annoying?

"... Well then I guess I asked you everything you know." He said and turned around to walk away.

"Wait!" Karin said as she followed Sasuke and grabbed his hand. "Stay with me please! I promise I will be good company!"

Sasuke gave Karin a slight glare as he pulled his hand loose.

"Why would I want to stay with you?" He asked. She was such a... girl.

"I can cook for you, you can stay in my house, and I know jobs for you!" Karin said, attempting to grab Sasuke's hand again. "Please Sasuke, give me a chance! You have no idea how much I have missed you!"

"Missed me? You said we just occasionally hung out." Sasuke said, quickly pulling his hand away again. "But I guess your offer does sound interesting."

"Are you looking for a place to stay." Karin asked hopefully.

"Well I'm staying at the inn now, but I guess if you have a private room, I'm looking for a place again. One where there's food on the table." Sasuke said. He remembered how hungry he had been the other night.

"Well... I do have some free rooms, but to feed another person, I don't have enough money for that.. but if you pay me some, I would love to cook for you." Karin said.

"Well you said you could get me a job." Sasuke said shrugging.

"Yes, I'm befriended with a butcher and he needs some people to work in the shop." Karin said, nodding. "He sells good quality so he pays well."

"Well that sounds nice enough. Where can I find him?" Sasuke asked.  
>"At the end of the street, on the corner." Karin said. "It's the only house made of stone."<p>

"Ok thanks. I think I will go there then. Where do you live?" Sasuke asked.

Karin just pointed to the house behind her.

"Here." She then said, smiling at him, once more giving him a seductive look. "Do you want to see it?"

"I think I will go get that job first. I'll see you later." Sasuke said and already walked away. He didn't need a tour from a flirty girl.

"Alright, I'll wait for you!" Karin said and waved to him, before almost running back into her house out of excitement.

* * *

><p>Neji was massaging a man while he was listening to Kiba's blabbering. Kiba was talking about the new job he had found and that he could get a lot of money from it. He was also telling something about the people he met. Neji was listening, but on the other hand he was barely paying attention. It was not his best day, that was something that was sure. He was bothered by the feelings that he had lately. He would get tense when Sasuke was close, when he saw families walking down the street together he felt this stabbing pain in his stomach and he only felt like being alone. But for some reason, this last feeling didn't count when Sasuke out of all people was close. He didn't know why, it was a complete mystery to him. It made him confused and it made him panic from time to time.<p>

At that moment, the door to the room opened and Sasuke walked into the room. He looked at Neji, or rather, he looked at how Neji's hands were on a man. Sasuke felt his stomach turn. Somehow he didn't like that sight. But he ignored it.

"Hey, I found a new place to stay." He said.

Both Kiba and Neji looked up now.

"Why?" Kiba asked, pulling up an eyebrow. "And where?"

"Well..." Sasuke said. He didn't want to admit to Neji that he had been right, but he had to. "I met a girl who knows me. A little. She lives here now and asked me to stay there for a while. She also got me a job."

"So it's just for you then?" Kiba asked, pulling up an eyebrow. "What's wrong with this place?" Neji let out a slight chuckle now.

"I would almost laugh, Sasuke." He then said.

"Shut up Neji." Sasuke snapped. "I don't know, I figured you two would be fine with staying here. And Neji and I need some time apart."

Kiba pulled up his other eyebrow as well, as he saw Neji shooting Sasuke a look.

"Why is that?" He then asked.

"Because I've been getting on his nerves." Sasuke answered, shrugging. "But she did invite the two of you to come eat at her place tonight."

"Who is she?" Neji asked, as he massaged the man in front of him a little more intense, working some knots away.

"Her name is Karin." Sasuke said. "I don't know a whole lot about her, but apparently, she has a crush on me."

Kiba snorted.

"Is it safe to live in one house with her then?" He asked. "Perhaps she wants you to pay rent in nature." He burst out laughing because of his own joke, and to everyone's surprise the man that Neji was massaging let out a chuckle as well. Neji let a slight smile come up to his lips now.

"Perhaps Sasuke wants to get harassed." He then said.

Sasuke looked at Neji a little startled. Where did that come from?

"I don't want to be harassed by 'her'." He said, not realising what this would sound like to the others.

"Would you like me to harass you then, love?" Kiba said, giving Sasuke an overly seductive look, which made even Neji laugh a little.

"Shut up Kiba. Do you guys wanna eat at her place or not?" Sasuke asked annoyed.

Kiba ignored Sasuke for a second to stare at Neji.

"Oh my god." He then said. "Neji, don't tell me you just laughed. You 'laughed'. Sasuke, pinch me, I think I'm having nightmares." Neji snorted. Kiba was insane, that was one thing that was clear.

Sasuke looked at Neji now. That smile on his face just looked... beautiful. But Sasuke quickly shoved that thought away and glared at Kiba.

"Stop making jokes and answer my question. Both of you." He said.

"Sure, free food is always appreciated." Kiba said. "The chick'd better be hot." Neji bit his lip to hide another smile that came up his face. Kiba just kept on making jokes and those stupid comments. They were so ridiculous that they were funny, something Neji welcomed after all the drama from past days.

"I'll come as well." Neji answered.

Sasuke looked at Neji now and then at Kiba and then looked away.

"Fine, I'll go tell her." He said. He didn't like Kiba being able to make Neji laugh and all Neji had ever done around him was snap or be emotionless.

"Won't you sit with us for some time?" Kiba asked. "Don't tell me we will only see you with breakfast or something from now on."

"Well I don't think you guys will miss me that much." Sasuke said shrugging.

"Of course we will, you're our buddy!" Kiba said, patting Sasuke on the shoulder. "Neji even said that he missed you around today." Within a second Neji was red and gave Kiba a death glare, obviously telling him to shut up with that look.

Sasuke looked at Neji now, surprised.

"You did?" He asked. The day before Neji had told him to fuck off because he couldn't stand him anymore. Neji was really confusing.

"Well we have been around each other for some time now." Neji said, shrugging. "No matter how grumpy and angry you always are, I did get used to it."

Sasuke looked at Neji a little longer and then stared at the ground. Now that was something new. He really thought Neji was just gonna be angry with him all the time from now on.

"I'm not always grumpy or angry." He said.

"What you wish." Neji said, slightly shrugging as he finished the massage.

"Riiight." Kiba said, sensing the tension. "So when will we meet up? Or are we going now?"

"I dunno, if Neji's done we could go now as well." Sasuke said shrugging.

"He's done, it was great, thank you." The man said and nodded gratefully to Neji, who nodded back.

"I'm going to wash my hands and tell the boss that we're not there tonight and then we can go." Neji said, as he departed to the kitchen of the inn.

"... Did he really say he missed me?" Sasuke immediately asked once Neji was gone. He looked at Kiba intensely.

"Yeah." Kiba said, nodding. "Why? Is it such a big deal?"

".. I just didn't expect it after all the yelling he did yesterday." Sasuke said.

"Did you have a big fight?" Kiba asked, frowning.

"Yeah. He told me all kinds of stuff, which came down to that I was just a plain evil person and that he wanted me out of his life. For some reason he.. just stayed." Sasuke answered.

"Hmm.. that's kind of weird." Kiba said. "Do you think that perhaps he just has the hots for you?"

Sasuke stared at Kiba as if he was going out of his mind now.

"What? No. Why would you say such a thing?" He asked.

"Oh come on Sasuke, you know you are gay, and he definitely is as well." Kiba said, snorting to the other.

"That doesn't mean anything? Not every gay guy falls for every other gay guy he meets." Sasuke said offended.

"You said it like you thought being gay was horrible." Kiba said, shrugging. "Heard that reaction more often. Why the surprise then?"

"Because he's Neji. He doesn't exactly like me you know." Sasuke said.

"That's what you think." Kiba said with a wink. "I saw the way he looked to your ass Sasu. And don't think I haven't seen you doing the same to him. I see everything."

"Well him looking at my butt is just because I have a nice one. That doesn't mean he likes me or has the hots for me." Sasuke said.

Kiba snorted.

"When I look at someone's butt it means I have the hots for that person." He then said. "But fine, believe what you want to believe. I think he has the hots for you and hates himself for it."

"No one goes from yelling at someone from suddenly having the hots for the other person." Sasuke said. "Do you have 'the hots' for someone?"

"Neji is a difficult person." Kiba said, shrugging. He then gave Sasuke a smirk. "I guess I kind of have the hots for Neji. I'm sure he could be an animal in bed."

"... You have the hots for Neji? And don't say things like that about him." Sasuke hissed a little. He didn't like this one bit.

Kiba pulled up an eyebrow as he looked at Sasuke.

"Why not?" Kiba asked. "Neji is damn hot, he's as beautiful as a girl, but has the behaviour of a guy. I'd love to get between the sheets with him once."

"Well don't say that. You can't do that." Sasuke hissed, but almost whispered. He didn't want anyone to talk about Neji like that.

"Why not?" Kiba asked again. He was smirking from the inside. He knew there was a little more going on between Sasuke and Neji. It seemed he was right.

"Because that's just not.. not appropriate." Sasuke said, using a word he would normally never say.

"Oh don't be so simple minded." Kiba said. "Don't tell me you never longed for a man's body before."

"Well I can't exactly remember if I did, now can I?" Sasuke said. He was not going to tell Kiba about that lake a few days before.

"You're a guy Sasuke, you must have felt something those last weeks." Kiba said. He then decided to shut up, because Neji came walking back to them.

"We can go." Neji then said.

Sasuke gave Kiba a final look and then walked to Neji. And he noticed himself that he might have walked a little too close. But he just pretended he didn't pay attention to the fact that their arms brushed and he could feel Neji's breath just slightly.

Neji looked at Sasuke as he passed him. He frowned for a second, before looking at Kiba and asking him to come as well. After a quick nod of Kiba, they left towards Karin's house.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

* * *

><p>"Sasuke!" Karin yelled, a look of absolute happiness and love on her face as she nearly tossed the door open for her guests, but especially for the handsome raven that stood in front of the small group. She couldn't stop herself from stepping over and giving Sasuke a hug.<p>

Sasuke turned his head away and pushed Karin off him, not wanting any body contact with her.

"Hi... I brought them." He said, keeping Karin on a distance with his arm.

Karin didn't even react to the rude rejection, and greedily looked to see who Sasuke's friends were. She had to stop herself from pulling up her nose as a boy with spiky brown hair and a cheeky grin introduced himself as Kiba. Her eyes widened though, as she came to face with a scowling brunette beauty. For a few seconds, both didn't say anything.

"I'm Karin." She then said, staring dreamily at the other beautiful male in front of her. She must be the happiest woman alive, to have two such gorgeous men in her house tonight. Finally, the other introduced himself as Neji, speaking with a sexy low voice. She really had to stop herself from drooling now.

Sasuke looked at Karin for a while, until he was suddenly rudely shoved aside by someone.

"You invited toddlers Karin?" The guy that was now standing in front of Kiba said. He grinned and Sasuke noted that this guy had very pointy teeth. Maybe even sharper then the two Kiba had.

"Only a toddler would say something like that." Kiba said, giving the grinning boy a grin back, while Neji only raised an eyebrow and folded his arms, as he looked at the new guy.

"Oi Suigetsu, be nice to our guests!" Karin snapped to the white haired and lean boy that had just come marching into the place. She then smiled a little nervously at Sasuke, who was obviously not liking to be shoved aside. "Don't mind my roommate, he's not really known for his social skills..."

"He doesn't have any manners either. Are you going to invite us now though?" Sasuke asked, crossing his arms.

"Oy oy Karin, you sure you wanna let these little brats in our home?" Suigetsu asked, still grinning.

"Stop bluffing Suigetsu, you know that these guys are of our age." Karin snapped, before turning around and walking into the house, beckoning the others to come in as well. Neji gave the loud girl a glare, before following her inside quietly, not having said a word yet beside his name.

Sasuke followed and soon everyone was inside.

"Well I was just trying to make them leave. I wanna spare them the taste of your food." Suigetsu said and laughed at his own joke. Sasuke found him rather irritating.

"So are you just not grown up or do you like to annoy people?" Neji suddenly asked Suigetsu, giving him a deadly serious look, which made Kiba snort. That guy was straight forward alright.

Suigetsu looked at Neji a little taken aback for a while and then started laughing again.

"Wow you're a nice kid!" He said. "You know a little smile wouldn't hurt you. It wouldn't hurt any of you." Sasuke gave out a scowl now. What a moron.

"Don't be so impolite!" Karin yelled at Suigetsu and gave him a hit on the head, while Neji just gave the blunt white haired guy a blank stare. Kiba laughed a little.

"Asking for Neji to show emotions and asking for Sasuke to show more emotions then irritation is like asking for a tree that grows gold." He said, giving Sasuke a teasing look. "Don't bother man. Don't bother."

"You two should stop fighting." They suddenly heard from behind them. When they turned around, a big guy with orange hair was standing behind them. "It's scaring the birds." He added.

"You and your birds..." Suigetsu mumbled. Sasuke wondered who this guy was. He talked with such a soft voice, it didn't suit his appearance at all.

"Who should stop fighting?" Karin snapped to the calm guy. "Suigetsu is the only one who keeps bickering around." Neji now brought a hand to his temple and rubbed it, while trying to stop himself from glaring at the annoying woman. How Sasuke wanted to live with her, he didn't understand nor like.

The guy didn't respond, he just looked at Karin with a blank look on his face and then moved to the living room.

"I'm starving. Can we eat?" Suigetsu now asked.

"Did you guys never hear of introducing yourselves?" Karin snapped. Kiba groaned.

"For god's sake woman, can't you stop screaming?" Kiba asked Karin, who in turn stared at him with an open mouth, not believing what she had just heard.

"Let it rest Karin." Sasuke said, walking past her into the living room as well.

"Yeah 'woman' stop screaming and make me some dinner!" Suigetsu said and followed Sasuke while laughing.

"Shut up!" Karin snapped, while pushing her glasses back a little in irritation. Neji let out an annoyed sigh as he walked past Karin and followed the rest into the living room, along with Kiba and finally a huffing Karin.

"Well dinner is done within five minutes." She snapped and stormed to the kitchen.

"Sit down." Sasuke told the remaining people in the room as he sat down on a chair. He would just make this place feel like some kind of home, whether the people he lived with would appreciate it or not.

"Yeah, do as our king says." Kiba said as he sat down right next to Sasuke. Neji took place in the seat left of Sasuke, now ignoring Kiba's little pranks. With a guy like him and Suigetsu in the room, he was sure he couldn't move a muscle without being teased. Not that he cared. It was only damn annoying.

"Sjees, you two do everything he says? Are you his slaves or something?" Suigetsu asked as he sat down at the dinner table. "What kind of team are you?"

"We're not a team." Sasuke immediately said.

"Ever heard of sarcasm?" Kiba asked. "And it's not like we actually follow up that order, but it's logical that if we're going to eat we sit down at the dinner table."

"...Seriously, could the two of you shut up for a minute?" Neji asked.

"I never shut my mouth, get used to it brunette." Suigetsu said, still smirking. It was like it hadn't been off his face for even a second.

"Thank god I don't have to." Neji said, huffing a little, and looked away.

"Go on for some longer and Neji will leave the table." Kiba said, once more giving Suigetsu a grin. "So who are you anyway?"

"Suigetsu is the name." Suigetsu said. "And that's Juugo." He pointed at the other guy. "We live with Karin. Didn't Sasuke tell you?"

"Nope." Kiba said, as he shook his head. "Else I wouldn't be asking right. So are you three family, friends, or are some of you together?"

"We're friends. No way I would ever be with Juugo and especially not Karin." Suigetsu said. "All she talks about is handsome men."

"You jealous?" Kiba asked immediately.

"Jealous of what, her babbling about handsome men?" Suigetsu asked. "Hell no, I can get anyone I'd like. I could even get those two stubborn assholes into bed if I wanted to." He smirked at Sasuke and Neji, earning a glare from Sasuke.

"Funny that some people created an own dream world which makes life a little easier for them." Neji commented.

"I think that those two stubborn assholes would be perfect for each other." Kiba said right after Neji's comment.

"Kiba." Sasuke hissed at Kiba now. He wasn't supposed to say things like that.

"They might give each other a good screw, but there wouldn't really be any relationship in a relationship where no one talks now would it." Suigetsu said, giving Neji a smirk.

"Why do you think they don't talk, you are screaming too much." Karin said as she entered the room with some stew in her hands, a good smelling one for that.

"Gosh that smells good." Kiba said, moving his hands over his stomach while smiling.

"She's going all out for her beloved Sasuke-kun." Suigetsu joked and laughed.

"My name is Sasuke. No kun's." Sasuke said. This guy annoyed him to no end.

No one really reacted to Suigetsu now, even Kiba didn't laugh as Karin gave everyone a plate with food. He appreciated Karin for cooking, that was sure.

"Thank you, it looks delicious." He said as he received his plate, which made Karin smile a little.

"Well at least someone still appreciate me cooking." She said.

"I always appreciate it." Juugo now said, earning him a plate.

"Karin. Why did you move here?" Sasuke now asked as he looked at her. He needed more information. Maybe something had happened to the town she lived in. Something that could relate to him disappearing from that place.

"Most people in the city I lived in were old, and besides, I wanted to train my healing abilities." Karin said. This lead Neji to look at her. "I needed a master, so I went here. And you stopped coming too, not even long ago."

"You.. heal people?" Sasuke asked. Now that could come in handy. No wonder he spend time with her even if she was most annoying.

"Yes I do." Karin said as she gave Sasuke both a smile, as his plate. "I'm not a professional yet, I'm still learning. But I can take some pains away yes."

"Did you find a master?" Sasuke asked. This could be interesting.

"No, I never found one." Karin said. "But I found out some things about myself and more specially: I found the answer to how I can heal for the best. Now I'm practicing my condition, I don't know how to save my energy."

"You should try meditation." Neji suddenly said, and Karin looked up to see him speaking.

"Meditation?"

"Meditation, ha! Karin can't shut up for five seconds, let alone meditate and calm down for a while!" Suigetsu laughed. Sasuke let a small smirk appear on his face. He couldn't imagine Karin meditating at all.

"Look who's talking." Karin bit out to Suigetsu. "But you're probably right, it's not something for me."

"You can say that again. And I never said I was going to 'meditate'." Suigetsu said. "That's for blanks."

"Does anyone want some sake?" Karin asked as everyone had gotten their plate. Neji, who actually felt like taking in some alcohol in right now, nodded and put his glass forwards.

"Gladly." He then said, and Karin immediately filled his cup. Neji returned the gesture by filling her cup for her as well.

"Hit me too will you." Sasuke said and Suigetsu just put his glass in front of him.

"Maybe if those two get drunk, your theory will come true.. Kiba it was right?" He said to Kiba grinning.

"Shut up before one of them hits you." Kiba said, as he too put his glass forwards as Neji filled all the cups.

"Don't worry Kiba, I won't lower myself like that." Neji said, which made Karin giggle a little.

"No he only does that to me." Sasuke told Suigetsu, who laughed a little.

"Can we eat now?" Juugo asked.

Neji gave Sasuke a slight glare as he finished filling his cup.

"Do you want some too, Juugo?" He then asked the silent man sitting across the table.

"No thank you." Juugo said, nodding at Neji. "Why are you travelling with Sasuke?"

"Me or Kiba?" Neji asked as he sat back down, while everyone started eating.

"You. You don't seem like the type of guy who gets along with a lot of people." Juugo said.

"We woke up next to each other after a monster had attacked the village I lived in." Neji said, as he started eating too. "He lost his memory, probably because of the attack as well."

"That doesn't answer my question as to why you are travelling with him." Juugo said. Sasuke looked at Neji now, his mouth full of food, but he was intrigued.

"Everyone else was dead." Neji said, giving Juugo a look. "Travelling on your own might be dangerous." He was not telling the whole truth now, but of course this was the main reason why they had started travelling together in the first place.

"But you could have stayed in the city." Juugo said. "Or found other people to travel with."

"The city has been burned to ashes, and as I said, everyone else was dead." Neji replied, a little harsher then he had meant to. But he was still dealing with the loss of all his family and friends. He hadn't let a lot of tears out and he had banned the previous events away as much as possible, but conversations like this brought it up again.

"Can't you go to some of your family members?" Juugo asked. "I mean, you could do that."

"My family has been murdered in front of my eyes, so there is no chance for that no." Neji said. "If there was still anyone alive who I cared about, I wouldn't be sitting here right now."

Kiba frowned a little as he looked at Neji. Damn. He never guessed that the guy had been carrying something heavy like this with him for all this time. No wonder he was as cold as ice.

Sasuke looked at Neji now. He never knew Neji saw his family die. He saw his parents die.

"Maybe we shouldn't talk about this." He said, knowing Neji would probably rather not talk about it.

Neji didn't react, but you could see that he had stiffened up and was sucking the inside of his cheek while clenching his teeth together. Just when everyone thought Neji was going to break down, he slammed his normal blank look on his face and started eating. The control the Hyuuga had over himself was becoming obvious, as he appeared very calm, as if nothing had happened at all.

"...I like the food." Kiba suddenly said, breaking the silence. A desperate try to lighten the mood a little.

"Me too." Juugo said, but their attempts didn't do much. Everyone ate in silence. Sasuke kept looking at Neji though. He wondered why Neji could cope with these things as well as he did. Or maybe he wasn't coping at all. Maybe he was just trying to make it look that way. Either way, Neji was tough.

* * *

><p>"Is that all you can, idiot?" Kiba yelled at Suigetsu while laughing in between his singing. He and Suigetsu were dancing through the room while singing a song together, with Juugo clapping on the background. Of course they had had several glasses of sake by now, which helped them ease the mood a little. Karin was doing nothing else then leaning against Sasuke and holding his arm, Sasuke being too drunk or not feel like removing his arm from her tight grip. She had put off her glasses and was hugging the handsome Uchiha's arm like her life depended on it.<p>

"All 'I' can do? Take a look at yourself moron!" Suigetsu yelled back at Kiba, rubbing his head as some kind of dance movements.

"...How long have they been doing this?" Sasuke said, with a bit of a slur apparent in his voice. He wasn't completely drunk, but it was harder to focus.

"Hmm.." Karin sighed. "I don't know. For some time." While Kiba started rolling over the ground, Neji was staring at it just as stiff as he had been at the table some hours ago. He hadn't said a word in the time Kiba and Suigetsu had gotten berserk.

"Why are you rolling on the floor dumbass?" Suigetsu asked, but he started joining Kiba and rolled left to right and back. Sasuke had to look away so he wouldn't get dizzy from it. And his eyes rested on Neji.

"Hey, when did you get here?" He asked. Ok, maybe he was slightly wasted, but at least he was still thinking about things.

Neji looked at Sasuke now and didn't reply. After a silence that seemed to be taking hours, he suddenly stood and while muttering a quick thanks for the dinner to Karin, he left the house and closed the door behind him. None of the morons that were now rolling on the floor noticed. Neither did Karin.

Sasuke did however and without thinking (so he wasn't thinking either), he pulled himself loose from Karin's grip, almost tumbling because of the force he had to do it with and walked to the door. Why was Neji leaving?

"Where are you going?" Karin called after Sasuke, as she stood.

"Out. Don't follow me." Sasuke simply said and then got out, slamming the door closed as if to prove his point. He looked around, and after a while he managed to see Neji walking off. He quickly followed.

"Hey... Neji!" He yelled after him.

Neji just kept on walking, not even reacting to what Sasuke said. He was walking in a fast pace, heading for the inn he and Kiba would still sleep tonight.

Sasuke started walking faster as well and when he saw he wasn't gaining in on Neji, he took a sprint and then grabbed Neji's arm.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"Back to the inn." Neji shortly said as he loosened his arm and continued walking. It was like he wanted to get away from Sasuke in particular as soon as possible.

"Why, weren't you having fun?" Sasuke asked as he started walking next to Neji and looked at him.

"It's none of your business." Neji forced out of his throat, still not looking at the other. But there was a troubled look on his face.

"What? Did I do something wrong or something?" Sasuke asked confused. None of his business? That didn't sound too friendly.

"No, I just want to be alone now." Neji said and swallowed, walking a little faster.

Sasuke just followed the same pace as he kept looking at Neji.

"Why, what got up your ass?" Sasuke asked. He was still drunk.

"Just leave me alone for now, Sasuke." Neji snapped, as he pushed Sasuke away, while gripping his chest, frowning to himself. There it was again, the pain. His body told him to let go of the pressure he put on himself, but his mind held his pride high up in the air. The only way how this problem could be solved was get the hell out of here.

Sasuke almost fell over, but managed to keep himself up. He just followed Neji again and grabbed him by the arm, turning him around.

"Stop pushing me away like that." He said stern.

"Stop following me." Neji said to Sasuke, trying to sound snappy, but it came out a lot less strong as he had wanted it to.

"Why?" Sasuke asked. "Why do you keep running away from me, it's annoying as hell." He held Neji's arms tightly.

Neji bit his lip before looking away.

"I'm not running away from you." He then said.

"Yes you are. You're constantly telling me to leave you alone, stop following you or you just push me." Sasuke said annoyed. "I don't like it at all."

"Then what do you expect me to do, cling to you like Karin?" Neji sarcastically asked.

"No, why would I expect that? She has a crush on me." Sasuke said. "I want you to stop pushing me away all the time."

Neji didn't answer as his look was now fixed on the ground, a deep frown marring his face. There obviously was a serious battle going on inside of Neji's mind, but Sasuke could only guess what it was about.

Sasuke looked at Neji for a while, then he frowned.

"Why don't you ever talk about anything? Like your feelings. Don't you feel horribly alone? I mean, you could make friends, but you're always so distant." He said.

Neji looked at Sasuke and was silent for some seconds.

"...I don't need friends." He then muttered. He closed his eyes right after. Oh who was he kidding. He was lonely. He missed his friends and family, and especially someone who loved him.

"... Everyone needs 'someone'." Sasuke said as he looked at Neji. He could just see how lonely Neji felt. Especially now.

Neji clenched his teeth together once more, as he opened his eyes to glare at the floor.

"..Why are you asking me those questions?" He then softly asked.

"I don't know, to get you to talk? Maybe you'll feel better then." Sasuke said. "I can tell you're suffering."

"..So you want to talk to me and even make me feel better?" Neji asked, now looking at Sasuke.

"I hate seeing you upset." Sasuke answered as he looked into Neji's eyes. They just drew him right in.

Right at that moment, it was enough for Neji. While his heart started racing and he felt like all the emotions he had been suppressing finally could get out of his chest, he moved forwards and pushed his lips onto Sasuke's, reacting out of pure instinct. Within seconds, he had pulled his arms free with renewed strength and put them around the raven's neck, so he could reach his lips better.

Sasuke's eyes grew big for a second, and he wanted to step back, but when Neji put his arms around his neck, all he could do was lean in and softly grab Neji's hips. He closed his eyes and deepened this... kiss.

Neji only took this as an agreement of Sasuke, and slightly opened his mouth and licked over Sasuke's lips, while he pushed his body against the other's body. He wanted attention, he wanted Sasuke to hold him now. He slowly felt the sick feeling that was in his stomach coming up, as he was showing more and more emotions.

As Neji pushed up to him, Sasuke wrapped his arms around Neji and licked Neji's tongue with his own. This somehow felt really good. Or maybe that was just because of the alcohol. No, it wasn't just the alcohol, Sasuke was sure of that.

Neji made sure they had a deep and steamy kiss, while he felt his face heat up. To try to push his emotions away again, he made the kiss even deeper and moved his tongue into Sasuke's mouth.

They kissed for a long time, Sasuke moving his hands over Neji's body slightly as it heated up around them more and more. Then Sasuke had to break the kiss, just to breathe again. He looked at Neji, slightly panting.

Neji looked at Sasuke as well, but now Sasuke could see he was shivering and his eyes were getting wet. He broke the eye contact as the first tear slipped down over his cheek.

Sasuke felt worry at first but then he let out a soft laugh.

"Was it that bad?" He asked.

"..N-no, that's not it." Neji muttered, as he shook his head. He quickly started wiping his tears away again. "...D-damn it Sasuke... I just need a hug.."

The second Neji had said that, Sasuke grabbed Neji's hand and pulled him close again. He rested his own head on Neji's shoulder and softly put his arms around Neji. The alcohol had loosened him up for sure.

Neji bit his lip once more as he put his head onto Sasuke's shoulder as well and held onto him for dear life, while clenching his eyes shut. He tried to muffle his sobs into Sasuke's shoulder, but failed horribly in doing that. He just needed to let it out now.. to let it go. And so he did.

Sasuke just kept holding Neji, and softly stroke through Neji's hair. He knew he shouldn't talk, so he just kept his mouth shut and let Neji cry. He obviously really needed to.

Neji was sobbing and shaking for some time, wetting Sasuke's shirt with his tears. But it felt good he could finally let it out. He was still ashamed for showing his emotions, but it couldn't be helped. He was sure he was going to kill someone if he didn't let it out now.

Sasuke just let Neji cry. He wasn't quite sure what else to do as Neji just kept sobbing and sobbing. Should he say something now? Or should he just shut up and stand there? How did he deal with these kinds of things before he lost his memory?

Neji bit his lip as he gripped Sasuke tightly.

"..I'm sorry... I just m-miss them so much.." He sobbed, opening his eyes just slightly.

"It's fine.." Sasuke said. "Of course you miss them. You should let it out."

"..How c-could this monster just... take 'everything' away f-from me in one day.." Neji whispered, a tone of unbelief in his voice. "..Why did he k-keep me alive..? And 'why' did he l-let me watch?"

".. I don't know Neji.. I'm sorry." Sasuke said, slightly shaking his head.

Neji clenched his eyes shut as he held onto Sasuke a little tighter.

"Sasuke.. c-can you please make me forget?" He then whispered, betraying a needy tone in his voice as he spoke.

Sasuke was silent for a while as he felt his heartbeat speed up. What exactly was it that Neji wanted him to do? He could never make Neji forget, but who was he to tell Neji that now?

"... Do you wanna go to your room?" He asked carefully.

Neji nodded as he released Sasuke and wiped his tears away. For some reason, he wanted Sasuke out of all people to be with him tonight. To keep him company and to distract him.

Sasuke nodded back and just pushed Neji forward. Somehow he felt like he owed something to Neji.

Neji walked with Sasuke, right into the inn and upstairs to Neji's room, after greeting the inn owner. When they walked into Neji's room, Neji sat down onto his bed and put his face into his hands for some time, stroking the last tears away.

Sasuke looked at Neji. He really wasn't sure what Neji was expecting now. He just sat down on the bed, next to Neji and put an arm around, just slightly. Sasuke looked at Neji patiently.

Neji was silent for some time, before lowering his hands and folding them together on his lap.

"...I want to do something now, but.. it's inappropriate and something I haven't ever done.." He then muttered.

Sasuke looked at Neji and then spoke.

"... I don't think it's inappropriate." He said. He knew what Neji was talking about. It couldn't be any other thing right?

"..In my past lives I was a priest and it's seen as a sin.. but I can't help but long for it." Neji muttered as his grip on his own hands tightened a little. "...Would you.. want something like that?"

"... Just shut up and stop thinking." Sasuke said and then softly but firmly grabbed Neji's head and kissed him.

Neji let out a moan as he looked at Sasuke now. He did nothing for a few seconds, before he responded to the kiss and wrapped his arms around Sasuke's neck once more, kissing him back. Sasuke was right.. He should just follow his feelings for once, instead of thinking it over and keep on talking a way out again. He needed this, both his body as his mind did.

Sasuke pushed Neji on the bed gently as he deepened the kiss and let his tongue brush over Neji's lips. His hands held Neji's shoulders. He wasn't thinking at all anymore.

Neji let out a slight moan as he kissed Sasuke deeply, and allowed Sasuke's tongue to slip inside of his mouth. Between all the kissing, licking and sucking, they slowly removed all of their clothes and before Neji realised what was happening, Sasuke was laying between his legs pleasuring his manhood, while three fingers rapidly moved in and out of him. All those sinful events made him moan and shiver in pure pleasure, something he had never experienced before. Sasuke was pleasing Neji's length, while his fingers were searching for something. He had done this before, he was sure of it. This came far too natural to him to not have done it before. He knew exactly what to do, he could tell by the sounds he earned from Neji.

Neji was panting while holding the sheets of the bed tightly in between his fists, stopping himself from losing his mind. He tossed his head back while fighting down a scream as a point was being hit that felt extremely pleasurable. He pushed his hips forwards, to feel more of it. He whimpered while bucking his hips.

"H-haa... S-Sasuke.. there please.. " He gasped, begging for more.

Sasuke made his fingers thrust against that same spot for a few more time, while still pleasuring Neji's cock. He then moved up, placing his body between Neji's legs. He kissed Neji again, grabbing his hips.

"... A-are you sure about this?" He asked, as he broke the kiss and looked down on Neji, a look of pure lust in his eyes.

"..Just d-do it Sasuke.." Neji answered, placing a hand over his own mouth so he was able to enjoy this to the fullest. They still couldn't be caught, so this was the only way he could come to full pleasure without restraining himself.

Sasuke nodded and then slowly pushed into Neji, giving out a moan as he did so. Yeah, he had done this before alright. This pleasure was very familiar and 'very' good.

Neji moaned loudly as he saw stars in front of his eyes for a second, as he was trying to get used to Sasuke's organ inside of him. It didn't feel good, but he was sure that in a few seconds, he would thank the heavens for following his feelings right now.

As Sasuke saw Neji calming down, he started moving. He had a firm grip on Neji's hips and rested his head near Neji's neck. He was completely focused now on giving himself and Neji a wonderful time.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

* * *

><p>"Yo, perhaps you love birds can pull apart now, because the cleaners are coming in a sec." Kiba said, the next morning. When Sasuke, who had been awake all night, looked up, Kiba was standing in front of him with his arms crossed and a wide smirk on his face.<p>

"Morning mister macho."

"What kind of stupid name is that?" Sasuke as he slowly let go of Neji, who he had been holding through the night. Every time he had tried to get away, Neji would almost wake up. And Neji needed his sleep, so Sasuke had just stayed.

"Don't you have a headache? You were drunk out of your mind when you came here."

Neji let out a groan while Kiba laughed.

"I was, but I can stand alcohol really well." He then said. "But seriously man, you should at least get out of here."

"Fine." Sasuke said as he quickly pulled on his clothes, which reminded him, they were still torn. "I doubt it they will realise what happened though."

"Two naked men in one bed mostly is enough." Kiba said, as he opened a window. "And you can smell a lot too." At that moment, Neji opened his eyes and sat up. He then let out a groan as he immediately laid down again. Shit, his backside hurt, and not just a little.

Sasuke looked at Neji for a second, before getting up and opening another window.

"There, happy now? Besides, I am not naked in his bed anymore." He said. He looked at Neji once again and wondered what Neji would think now. They had been drunk last night, and Neji had been vulnerable. So what would he say?

"Well if you want I could have told you nothing, but that would have been a little mean, don't you think so?" Kiba asked, pulling up an eyebrow. "Asshole." With that, he left the room, so he could continue with his breakfast downstairs. Neji carefully sat up now, reaching for his clothes.

"...Did you sleep well?" He then asked.

"I didn't sleep." Sasuke answered as he sat down on Kiba's bed. "And you almost didn't either. Do you wake up from everything?"

"I'm a very light sleeper yes." Neji said, as he nodded. He put on his underwear and stepped into his pants. "..Damn.. I feel sore."

"What did you expect?" Sasuke said, smirking slightly at the thought. It quickly faded though. What were they to each other now?

"Nothing like this I must say.." Neji said. He sat down on the bed again and then looked at Sasuke. "..Do you regret it?"

".. I don't know, do you?" Sasuke asked as he looked back at Neji.

"No, I don't." Neji replied. "Of course it's painful now, and somewhere I even feel ashamed.. but I don't regret doing it."

".. So what now then?" Sasuke asked, leaning against a wall.

"..It's kind of awkward now, isn't it?" Neji asked with a slight frown.

"..It is.." Sasuke said, nodding. He wasn't so sure what to say to Neji anymore. Maybe what they had done that night wasn't the smartest thing to do.

Neji let out a slight chuckle.

"You did bring my mind off stuff." He said.

"I guess that was what you wanted right?" Sasuke asked. Neji had said to make him forget. Getting his mind off stuff was as close to that, that Sasuke could reach.

"Yeah it was.. I enjoyed it a lot." Neji said, nodding.

"Good. So should we leave it at that then?" Sasuke asked. Maybe telling Neji that this was all would be better for both of them. After all, what future could anyone have with someone who can't remember a thing?

"If you want that." Neji said, giving Sasuke a look.

"Well I guess that would be best. You needed this yesterday, but you don't need anything now." Sasuke said. "Besides, what would you want, a relationship? That's not going to happen."

"Well, we could do things like we did yesterday more often." Neji said, as he shrugged. He put on his shirt in the mean time.

"Well then we'd be fuckbuddies. I'm sure we don't have time to do it again. Besides, I need to go, I'm late for work." Sasuke said, looking at the clock. He'd better make a run for it. The fact that Neji wanted more out of this then just one time of great sex frightened him.

Neji looked away now, with an indescribable look on his face. It could be anger, but also disappointment.

"Fine." He then said.

"Don't be mad now." Sasuke said. "I gotta run. Guess I'll see you later." He quickly left the room. It was a good thing he was going to work for a butcher. He could let his frustration out on some dead cow.

* * *

><p>That afternoon, Neji was walking towards the butcher Sasuke was working in. He knew Sasuke would be finishing work too and had decided to pick him up. He walked into the shop and saw the butcher himself selling some meat to clients. Sasuke had told him that the butcher always worked longer than him, so he could expect Sasuke any moment.<p>

It didn't take long, before Sasuke came from the back of the shop and threw the clothes he had to wear on the counter and said goodbye to his boss. When he turned around he spotted Neji and frowned slightly.

"Why are you here, you get food from the inn right?" Sasuke asked.

"Yes, but I felt like picking you up." Neji said, shrugging, as he looked at the guy in front of him. He betrayed himself by staring at the handsome man in front of him, who was looking a little tired and sweaty: which made him look sexy as hell. Neji could feel the need growing inside of him to share one bed with Sasuke tonight once more.

".. Stop staring at me, I know I look bad." Sasuke said as he wiped some sweat of his forehead. "We can go then, I'm done with work."

"You don't look bad." Neji said before he could stop himself.

Sasuke looked at Neji and then smiled just slightly.

"Thanks. Although I'm sure I could look a lot better. Reminds me that I still need new clothes. Nobody's my size." He said.

"There are more than enough clothes your size back with us, Sasuke-kun." A voice from behind them suddenly said and when they turned around, they saw the guy with the glasses leaning against the doorframe of the shop, smirking at them. "All your clothes are still hanging in your room."

Sasuke immediately narrowed his eyes when he saw the guy standing there. Sasuke stormed to him and pinned him against the wall.

"How dare you come here after what you tried." He hissed.

The guy smirked even more now.

"Tried what?" He asked. Neji was looking at the guy with a frown on his face now. This guy definitely wasn't to be trusted. Seeing the expression on his face but also the things he was saying. To not even start what the guy had tried to do to him.

"You tried to kill Neji!" Sasuke yelled now, as he pushed against the guy with his hands. He felt so angry, just remembering it.

"My, that was a very quickly made conclusion." The guy said, laughing a little. "I wasn't the one who tried to kill your comrade, Sasuke. Else I would have succeeded in it."

"You were standing there and Neji was almost dead! How can you possibly think we are stupid enough to think you had nothing to do with it!" Sasuke yelled.

"Calm down, Sasuke." The guy said. "I would never kill anyone close to you, because I know you're strong enough to murder me for it."

"What are you talking about?" Sasuke asked with narrowed eyes. He still had the guy pinned against the wall.

"About your strength Sasuke-kun." The guy answered, tapping on his glasses with the tip of his finger. "There's nothing more to explain. I'm not stupid. If I would kill anyone close to you, a comrade, a lover, a family member, it would mean my death. And I prefer to live. It's simple as that."

"Then what the fuck is my strength?" Sasuke yelled now. "How do you know me and who the hell are you?"

"Sasuke calm down, this way he's not going to tell you anything." Neji suddenly snapped to Sasuke.

"All your answers can be answered by our master, and I could take you there." The guy said. He then smirked. "You may remember me as Kabuto."

Sasuke frowned now. He did remember that name, and he did know this guy was familiar.

"Who is this master then? Just tell me what you know about me already." Sasuke said, ignoring Neji.

"I'm afraid that I barely know something about you, for that I should take you to Orochimaru-sama." Kabuto answered, folding his arms.

Sasuke felt a shiver going down his spine when he heard that name. But he couldn't place it, like so many things.

"Why would I go with someone who tried to kill my friend." Sasuke stated.

"You don't listen." Kabuto said. Neji was frowning in the mean time. If Kabuto wasn't the one who had tried to kill him, then who was it? Would this person still be around? And what.. if this person was the same one who had destroyed his city?

"Or better said, why would he go with someone who watched someone killing his friend?" Neji then asked Kabuto.

"Ah, that's hard to explain." Kabuto said, once more smirking. "You wouldn't understand."

"Well make us understand then." Sasuke snapped. "If this 'Orochimaru' guy knows me, then why won't he just come to me? And why did you just watch Neji almost die? You should have done something." He had all these questions to ask. But he knew this guy wasn't going to answer any of them the way he wanted.

"It would have made the situation more complicated if I took action." Kabuto said. "Orochimaru-sama has more to do then search for students who ran away after becoming mad."

"You're making no sense at all." Sasuke snapped, now letting go of Kabuto and just glaring at him. Even if this guy wasn't making any sense, their names sounded familiar. They knew him and Sasuke was desperate to figure out who he was. He needed his memory back and this might just be the way to do it.

"Is this a sign that you want to come with me?" Kabuto asked, as he kept on leaning against the wall.

"I never said that. I'm just weighing out things." Sasuke snapped. He took a look at Neji and then looked at Kabuto again. Maybe he should go. "If you want me to come along so badly, then say something which will make me want it too."

"Oh don't understand me wrong, we're not dying without you." Kabuto said. "You are the one here who needs something from us, not the other way around. If I have to convince you to come along, you'll leave in the end anyway."

"Then why would I come with you?" Sasuke snapped. This guy was not very convincing at all. It would be simple to make him come, all he needed was reassurance that this place was gonna provide him with answers.

"Because we have the answers for your questions." Kabuto said, giving Sasuke a devilish look.

"Sasuke, don't go with him." Neji said, giving Sasuke a warning look.

Sasuke looked at Neji now and then back to Kabuto.

"Fine I will come. But if you're lying I'll kill you." He said. He just 'had' to know who he was.

"Sasuke don't, this guy can't be trusted." Neji snapped to Sasuke.

"And for the record, who knows who this Orochimaru guy is? You have no idea what he wants with you. Perhaps he's an evil person, you don't know. Don't go there, and especially not alone."

"He's right, you shouldn't go." Someone else suddenly said, and when they turned to where that voice had come from, they saw a guy standing by the door. His hands were in his pockets and he looked like he really wasn't surprised there was such a conversation in a butchery.

"What are you butting in for?" Sasuke asked annoyed.

"Just telling you that he's right. I never heard anything good about Orochimaru. Go there and it's a one way ticket to your own death." The guy said.

"And who might you be then?" Kabuto asked, narrowing his eyes slightly.

Neji looked at the guy, a little relieved. This might lessen the chance that Sasuke would go with Kabuto.

"Shikamaru." The guy said. "And trust me, this guy is up to no good as well. Siding with Orochimaru, tch. Pure evil if you ask me."

"How do you know that?" Sasuke asked. "Is that true?" He then asked Kabuto.

Kabuto couldn't help but sweat drop now.

"Orochimaru has a goal that some people don't agree with." He then said. "People tend to think things they don't agree with are evil."

"If killing innocents and experimenting on them isn't evil then what is?" Shikamaru asked. "I have heard the stories. Even seen some of the consequences. Go there and you die, I'll tell you that."

".. Experimenting?" Sasuke asked.

"Orochimaru is gathering magic from all sorts." Kabuto explained. "So he's experimenting with them as well."

"On people." Shikamaru said. "It's your choice." He told Sasuke. "But I'd find another person to follow."

"You've never been with Orochimaru, so your stories are based on rumours." Kabuto said.

"Not every rumour is just a rumour." Shikamaru said. Sasuke now turned to Kabuto and then to Neji. For a second, he was lost at what to do. Go with this other guy and find out who he was but risk his life, or stay with Neji and maybe loose the chance to find out who he was all together.

Neji took a step closer to Sasuke now.

"Sasuke, if he really would be trustworthy, he would tell you." He said, looking at Sasuke serious. "What if this Orochimaru actually put some kind of experiment on you which made you lose your memory?"

"Then I should go to him and ask him what if was and how I can get it back. You both are not really giving me any good reasons to stay or leave." Sasuke told Kabuto and Neji. "A stranger is better at it then you."

"Are you kidding me?" Neji suddenly snapped. "What do you expect me to do, throw me at your feet and beg you to stay? I tell you that this guy could have something to do with your memory and that he could even kill you, isn't that reason enough to stay?"

"He has something to do with my memory yes. Which is exactly why I wanna seek him out." Sasuke snapped back. "Fact is, that this guy told me I could be walking to my own death and I'm not ready to die. So before I go there, I need to find out what these powers are that I have. I'm not going, so chill it."

Neji just gave Sasuke a glare now.

"So be it." Kabuto said, and then, he disappeared.

Sasuke looked at the place where Kabuto had stood before and then let out a growl. He turned to Neji, angry.

"Happy now?" He snapped.

"You said you were not going yourself." Neji snapped back. "But sorry, I won't worry about you anymore. Idiot." He then turned around and walked in the direction of the inn, while huffing.

Sasuke glared at the door for a second, then followed Neji. Once he caught up with him he roughly turned him around.

"You don't get it do you?" He snapped.

"Oh I get it, you want to find out who you are, and those guys know something about you so you just want to go with them and see what happens." Neji snapped back. "'You' don't get that there could also have been people in your life that didn't plan good things with you. And this guy definitely didn't look trustworthy. This guy is not planning good things Sasuke, I tell you."

"See, you don't understand. Because if you did you would realise that it is the most frustrating thing not to remember. I don't know if I will run into people from the past anymore, because I don't even know if my family is alive or not, where I came from. I just don't know and it's killing me. I 'need' to know and if that means I have to do something reckless then I will. You just don't understand." Sasuke snapped.

"The only thing I don't understand why you don't ask Karin where on earth she lived, because you apparently came into her village some times a week." Neji snapped back. "But no, going with a guy who's not telling you anything, tries to lure you with him to some kind of guy he doesn't want to tell anything about. Don't be so naive Sasuke. If it would have been a good place, why on earth would you have left it?"

"Well I don't remember now do I? Besides, I already thought of that, but she said I was training, and that guy just now said I had a master." Sasuke snapped. "So that means that I came there when I was already with that Orochimaru guy. And wipe that stupid look off your face, I'm not as dumb as you think I am."

"No, apparently you're much worse." Neji snapped back. He then snatched himself loose and pushed Sasuke away. "Don't you get it that I just want you to stay, safe?"

"Of course I get that, but that's not your decision. It's not up to you to decide how or when or if I will get my memory back." Sasuke snapped. "That's not your call even if you want me to stay safe."

Neji looked away now, still pissed.

"Whatever." He then said.

Sasuke looked at Neji and then looked away. It was obvious Neji didn't understand. No one understood the frustration of not knowing anything. Not to think about but ways to figure out how to get back a memory. It was horrible and nobody understood it. And Neji was obviously not the right person to talk about it with.

"Maybe you should just leave." Sasuke said.

Neji gave Sasuke a look now.

"..I do know how it feels that you don't have anything anymore, I lost everything too." He then said. "The only difference is that I remember, and you don't. So in a way, I understand you."

"But you remember." Sasuke snapped now. "You can remember the good times you had with your family, you can remember what it was like. I'm lost.. I don't know where I'm going, I don't know what I'm doing, I don't know anything and I can't remember any good times I might have had. It can't remember and I can't take it.." Sasuke took in a deep breath as he looked away.

"...Well I hope that we will get your memories back, but.. you can still have good times now, with the people that are around you.. don't ruin your life by trying to get your old life back, that's all I'm saying." Neji said.

"I don't want to be someone I'm not. I can't try to live another life. What if I turn out to be someone completely different then how I am now?" Sasuke asked. "Then what will I do? I will have spent my time with people that maybe won't fit into my old life at all. I'll be forced to give up even more. I just need to know who I was before I can move on."

"Well you won't be forced to spend time with people that don't 'fit' into your old life." Neji said. "It's all up to you."

"What would you do then?" Sasuke asked. "I keep losing bits. Sometimes I think like I might remember something and it just slips away again. I don't know how to deal with it anymore."

"The only thing I can think of is thinking positive and wait for it to come back." Neji said.

"I don't know how long I'll be able to think positive with nothing to look forward to." Sasuke said, speaking a little softer then usually.

"How do you know there is nothing to look forward for?" Neji asked, frowning. "I lost everything too, is that reason for me to think my life is suddenly not worth anything anymore?"

"I'm just not a positive thinker ok." Sasuke snapped. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. Forget what I said."

"Sasuke." Neji said, giving Sasuke a stern look.

"What? What do you want me to say? I don't know what to do with it, I feel like I don't have a future like this. You might have lost the people around you, your home, but you still have those memories. You still know who you are and what you want and 'can' do. I don't know anything. I can't do anything. I need some kind of relief and all I can think about is getting my memory back." Sasuke said, his voice almost desperate.

"I think it would be better for me if I couldn't remember what I had back then and what I don't have anymore." Neji snapped. "Just try to think positive Sasuke. No, it's not nice, but don't make it your life goal. What if you don't get it back? You're becoming old and the only thing you did was searching for a life you won't ever remember anymore?"

".. You don't understand." Sasuke said, shaking his head and then turned around to walk away. He was done talking. Done expressing feelings. Neji would never understand what it felt like and Sasuke was done trying to make him too. He regretted not having left with that Kabuto guy now.

"You only think I understand when I say I feel sorry for you." Neji said. And with that, he left Sasuke to stand there on his own, to think of things.

Sasuke stared at the floor now and then left in the direction of Karin's place. He didn't need to see Neji for a while. Maybe he would just move on on his own. He couldn't build up a life without knowing who he was. And anyone who couldn't understand that and would get in his way, was gonna be left behind. No matter how hard it was.

* * *

><p>The next day, Neji had been walking through the city for a few hours already, asking and looking around for one certain person. But it was like he was hiding somewhere for him, since he was impossible to find. Neji was now walking back to the inn, having given up. He chose to walk through the park that was close to the inn and to his surprise, he saw the guy he had been looking for laying on a hill, relaxing on his back in the grass. Neji sighed. Of course, the park. The guy already had looked lazy, of course guys like that could be found in a park. He had no idea where his mind had been lately. He walked over to the boy and then sat down next to him, noticing he was observing the sky. He frowned for a while as he looked up too, before looking at the guy, who was not looking at him.<p>

"What do you see in the clouds?" Neji then asked, interested.

The guy didn't look at Neji, nor was he surprised to hear someone next to him. He just stared at the clouds before answering.

"Normally nothing, they're just soothing. Right now though, that one looks like the duck my mother made last night." He said, pointing at an odd looking cloud. It didn't look like a duck at all.

Neji pulled up his eyebrows as he looked at the cloud.

"Must have been a pretty fucked up duck then." He then said. He never swore, but sadly enough, this was the only way to describe the image of the duck that was currently in his mind.

"Yes. It was. My mom's not a very good cook." The guy stated. He then pushed himself up and put his hand out to Neji. "I'm Shikamaru."

Neji smirked a little and shook the guy's hand.

"Neji." He then said. "I have to apologize for what happened yesterday. We should at least have thanked you for the information you gave us."

"Oh that's ok." Shikamaru said. "I'm just glad I walked in and stopped that other guy you were with from going."

Neji nodded thankfully.

"I am as well, I didn't trust that Kabuto guy at all." He said. "Which is why I'm here now. You told us you had heard some things about Orochimaru... Sasuke lost his memory, and apparently he has trained with this Orochimaru guy. Could you please tell me and Sasuke about this man?"

"Well I don't see any Sasuke here, but I can tell you I don't know much." Shikamaru said. "All I know is this guy is doing some freaky stuff and lots of people get killed in the process."

"I wanted to invite you over for dinner at the place Sasuke is staying now." Neji said. "As a thank you, and also so you could tell us while no one is there to disturb us."

"Well I guess that would do. Anything's better then eating the food my mom serves us." Shikamaru said with a slight grin. "So where is he staying then?"

"A little to the south, with a girl named Karin and two guys, Juugo and Suigetsu." Neji said. "There will also be another guy named Kiba."

"Karin? Poor guy, why is he living 'there'?" Shikamaru asked. "And who is Kiba?"

"It's free and he likes his privacy." Neji said, chuckling a little. "Kiba has been travelling with me and Sasuke for some time. He's... very energetic and a real teaser, but he's nice. You'll probably like him."

"You're quick to thinking you know who I might like or not." Shikamaru said, grinning. "Anyway, what time?"

"Everyone likes Kiba, that's why." Neji said with a slight smile. "In two hours would be great. Karin will be preparing dinner in three hours, but we can speak before we eat."

"Ok deal. I'll see you then." Shikamaru said and laid back down to watch the clouds.

"Thank you." Neji said as he stood. "I'll see you tonight. And, try to spot the bird." With that, he walked away, leaving Shikamaru to search for the bird he had talked about in the clouds.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

* * *

><p>"Why did you guys have to accept Neji's idea to have dinner with all of us again?" Sasuke asked that evening. He was sitting on the couch and looked at Suigetsu. "I mean, I told you I wasn't going to spend time with Neji anymore, but you guys invite him over."<p>

"Well unlike you, 'we' like Neji." Suigetsu said, while he was drinking some water. "And we like Kiba, who's coming too. You don't 'have' to talk to your lover."

Sasuke gave Suigetsu a glare now.

"He's not my lover, who gave you that idea?" He said, maybe a little too snappy.

"Because you react far too snappy for not liking him." Suigetsu, giving Sasuke a smirk.

"Well you are wrong." Sasuke said. At that moment, the doorbell rang and Sasuke got up to get the door. But before he could open it, Kiba and Neji were already inside, having let themselves in. "You're supposed to wait until someone answered the door." Sasuke told them.

"Oh come on, don't be so grumpy." Kiba said as he gave Sasuke a hit on the shoulder.

"We have another guy coming here soon." Neji informed everyone.

Sasuke looked at Neji and then waited till Kiba was occupied with Suigetsu, to ask Neji.

"Can we go upstairs for a second?" He asked Neji, looking at him.

"Who is coming over here? Do we know the guy?" Suigetsu asked Neji, who pushed Kiba aside a little to look at Neji.

"Shikamaru, a guy we met yesterday." Neji said. "He could tell us something about someone who has something to do with Sasuke's past."

"... When did you talk to him?" Sasuke asked, frowning a little.

"Today, I asked him to come over to tell us more about Orochimaru." Neji answered, as he walked into the living room and sat down.

"... Did you go and look for him?" Sasuke asked as he followed Neji.

"Yeah, he knows stuff and he seems trustable." Neji said, as he looked at Sasuke.

"... Oh.. Neji can we talk? Upstairs?" Sasuke asked. Neji had gone through the trouble of finding someone who maybe knew more. Sasuke felt like he needed to make up for his behaviour now.

"Do we have to?" Neji asked, pulling up an eyebrow.

"Yes we do." Sasuke answered, a little more stern now.

Neji looked at Sasuke for some time, before he got up and he walked towards the stairs, going up. He had no idea what Sasuke wanted to talk about now.

Sasuke quickly followed Neji, giving Kiba and Suigetsu a glare when they whistled. Once both of them were upstairs Sasuke looked at Neji.

"... I'm sorry. And thanks." He said.

"I think you need to give a little more explanation to that." Neji said.

"I'm sorry for my behaviour. I was just angry. So..." Sasuke said, not looking at Neji.

"..That's ok." Neji said, shrugging.

"Well I'm sorry." Sasuke said. "And thank you for seeking that guy out. I know you didn't do it for you."

"I guessed I should make it up to you a little since I scared the freaky guy away." Neji said, giving Sasuke a slight smile.

"Well I'm not ready to go with him so... just.. Sorry and thank you." Sasuke said.

Neji nodded to Sasuke.

"You're welcome." He then said. He then walked towards the stairs again, ready to go down to the others.

Sasuke looked at Neji leaving and then quickly followed him. When he passed Neji, he gave Neji's hand a quick brush. Maybe Neji would notice, maybe not. But Sasuke had just realised that Neji might just be what he needed to see things positive again.

Neji looked up and watched Sasuke walk down the stairs, before following him. He didn't know why, but it felt like things would go easier with them from now on for sure.

When Sasuke and Neji entered the living room again, another person had arrived. Shikamaru was standing in the living room, getting questioned by Suigetsu and Kiba.

"Neji told us you know things. You don't look that smart to me though." Suigetsu said smirking. Sasuke sighed. Suigetsu was annoying.

"I'm smart enough not to go into discussion with you." Shikamaru said and then turned around. "Hey Neji."

"Hey Shikamaru." Neji said, giving Shikamaru a friendly nod. "Thanks for coming, I really appreciate it."

"Yeah sure. I already said, everything beats my mom's cooking." Shikamaru said grinning. "So who is who?"

"This is Sasuke." Neji said, pointing to Sasuke. "The noisy guy here is Suigetsu, the other noisy guy is Kiba. Karin is probably in the kitchen but you know her already, and have you ever heard of Juugo?"

"He's been watching some birds with me some times." Shikamaru said nodding. He gave everyone a look, and Sasuke almost thought he looked at Kiba a little longer then at the rest. A little more intense too, but that was probably his imagination.

"Who is Orochimaru?" He then asked.

"A scientist." Shikamaru answered. "At least that's what he claims. He's just a murderer if you ask me."

"Why then?" Neji asked. "Let's sit down in the living room. Do you want something to drink while you tell us?"

"A beer would be nice." Shikamaru said. They all went to the living room and sat down, waiting for Shikamaru to say more.

"Well, to answer your question, he experiments on people. And we all know not every experiment turns out the way we want. He has killed lots of people in the process of finding... something. I don't know what he wants to achieve." Shikamaru said.

"I'll go get his beer." Kiba said as he rushed to the kitchen. Neji nodded to him thankfully and then sat down.

"So did you speak to one of those people or..?" Neji asked. "Are those people relatives or does he kidnap them?"

"I think he goes out looking for people who seek certain things. That's what I've heard. I've met a few, but they had gone crazy because of him. Either they thought they could conquer the world, or they were just lunatics." Shikamaru said. "I've never met one that was sane."

"...Sasuke lost his memory." Neji said, frowning a little. "Could this be from one of the experiments as well?"

"Could be." Shikamaru said. "It wouldn't surprise me if that psycho messed with his brains."

"But it happened another time. Later on, when I was travelling with Neji." Sasuke said.

"Yes, he lost his memory partly." Neji said. "We had a fight and I stormed away, leaving him paralyzed, and the next thing he knew was that he had me in his arms, unconscious, because I had been strangled by someone I didn't see."

"Well could be some kind of after affect. Especially since you paralyzed him. Which sounds like a nice power by the way." Shikamaru said.

"You paralyze people?" Suigetsu asked.

Neji looked at Suigetsu for a second, before turning his attention back to Shikamaru.

"One of my powers is my ability to take over someone else's body." He then said. "But that aside, I do nothing to the brain. And he didn't fall down that hard when he couldn't move anymore. I think it was something else I can't explain."

"Well we can't find that out." Shikamaru said. "Any other questions?"

"Do you?" Neji asked Sasuke now. "I would like to know where this guy is living.. and does he have subordinates or is he experimenting on his own?"

"I don't know that." Shikamaru said, shaking his head. "And he lives somewhere in a forest I believe, but nobody I heard talk about him knows where."

"So all we know is this guy lives somewhere in a forest near Karin's old hometown." Sasuke stated.

Neji nodded.

"I guess." He then said. "It's a little more then we first knew."

"But nothing we can use." Sasuke said. "Besides, I thought you didn't want me to go there." He looked at Neji now.

"Are you two a couple?" Shikamaru asked.

Neji snorted at this.

"Trust me, we are far from." He said. He then looked at Sasuke again. "I don't want you to go there no, but if we can go with a lot perhaps it's safer." At that moment, Kiba came walking back to them and put the beer down in front of Shikamaru.

"Here you go, pineapple head." He said, and then started laughing because of his own joke.

Shikamaru just stared at Kiba bluntly and then grabbed his beer. Suigetsu in the mean time started laughing like mad.

"You're right, he does look like a pineapple!" He laughed. Shikamaru just ignored him.

"You know, it still wouldn't be smart going there. Especially if he has done some kind of experiment on you. Who knows what he could do to you." He said.

"He's still the only one who knows me. Even Karin knows nothing about me and I apparently spend time with her." Sasuke said.

"Wrong." Kiba said to Sasuke. "He's the only one of which 'you' know he knows you. There could be a lot more."

"Well chances are just as big I will find them, as that I won't. If I won't find anyone soon, I'll be forced to seek that Orochimaru guy out." Sasuke said.

"I would wait for some time man, do you really want to get into that much of a dangerous situation?" Kiba asked, frowning.

"Yes it's a dream come true." Sasuke said sarcastic. "Of course I don't, but I'm not going to sit around and wait for someone who knows me."

Kiba frowned even deeper now.

"Look, I know it's sucks that you lost your memory, but if I were you I would stress a little bit less about getting your memory back." He then said. "If this guy knows you, you must have been his victim or his subordinate. In both ways, it doesn't mean a good past or memory. He won't give you a cup of tea and chat around."

Neji pulled up one of his eyebrows. He never expected Kiba to be even smarter than Sasuke at a certain point. It was definitely impressive that Kiba understood the situation like this.

"The kid's right you know. That guy didn't want you to come so badly if they weren't planning on doing anything with you." Shikamaru said.

"Nonetheless he knows me. Besides, that Kabuto guy told me I was strong, so I'm sure nothing will happen once I go there." Sasuke said.

"Yeah you sure can rely on that now you don't know what it is." Neji sarcastically said. "And he does."

"Well I don't really care what you all think. I'll get my memory back, even if that means going to someone dangerous." Sasuke stated.

"I think you lost your brains along with your memory." Kiba said, sighing a little annoyed.

"I think you all just don't understand. Now let's drop this subject." Sasuke said, a little annoyed.

"Of course Sasuke." Kiba said. "We're all wrong and you're the only one who's right."

"Come on guys, we have a guest." Neji sternly said.

"I know that, which is why I'm telling you to shut up and drop the subject." Sasuke said a little snappy.

"It's fine Neji. You're not half as bad as my mother and father." Shikamaru said.

"Good to hear that." Neji said as he gave Sasuke a hit on the back of his head. "So do you have siblings or are you living alone with your parents?"

"I'm an only child." Shikamaru said as he grinned. Sasuke rubbed his head and then left the room annoyed. He wasn't even going to say anything about that. He would talk about it when he wasn't longing to smash Neji's head twice as hard.

"It's nice huh." Neji said, giving Shikamaru a slight smirk. "More attention."

"Yeah, you're lucky, I have an annoying sister." Kiba said, sighing.

Shikamaru let out a laugh.

"I think I would die if I had a sister. Girls are annoying. All they do is yell." He said.

"Nah, not all girls are annoying, but lots of them are." Kiba said, smirking.

"Then name one that isn't." Shikamaru said.

"I could, but you don't know them anyway." Kiba said, pulling up his eyebrows. "And my mom is ok."

"Good for you." Shikamaru said. "I prefer boys though." He grinned just slightly. Sasuke now came back in the room and sat down next to Neji, without a word. He was still mad Neji hit him.

"Oi, what's with you?" Kiba said to Sasuke, wondering why Sasuke was looking like that.

"Nothing." Sasuke said, almost hissing. He was trying to keep the mood nice. If Neji was gonna argue with him again, he would hang himself, he was sure of that.

"Just let him be, he's probably grumpy that I hit him to let him shut up." Neji said to Kiba.

"Shut up Neji." Sasuke snapped, not able to keep his anger in.

"... Maybe we should talk about something else." Shikamaru said.

"So, how did you get that hair anyway?" Kiba asked Shikamaru, giving him a cheeky grin.

"What is your obsession with my hair? It just does that when I put it in a ponytail." Shikamaru said, and grinned back at Kiba.

"It's not an obsession, I'm interested." Kiba said. "Everyone in here has weird hairstyles. My hair is spiky too, Sasuke's hair looks like a cockatoo's hair and Neji's hair... is just flat. And long."

Sasuke touched his hair a little.

"It does not look like a cockatoo's." He said.

"It does." Suigetsu said. "At least my hair is pretty." He made a wavy movement with his hair as he moved his head.

Kiba snorted.

"Yours looks like someone bit it on the bottom." He then mockingly said.

"... It's beautiful." Suigetsu said offended.

"You're all very gay, talking about hairstyles." Shikamaru stated.

"Why is talking about hair gay?" Kiba asked, furrowing an eyebrow. "Do you really think that one of us is gay?"

Shikamaru just gave Neji a look.

"I don't 'think' so, I know so." He said.

Neji gave Shikamaru an offended look in return now, which made Kiba laugh.

"Sorry Neji, you just look like you're gay." He said.

"He does, doesn't he. Especially the hair. And the way he moves." Sasuke said, smirking a little.

Neji gave Sasuke a look now.

"And now it's about offending me your mood suddenly lightened?" He asked.

"Hmm, yes." Sasuke said. "Besides we're not offending you, we're just telling you you're gay. Which you are."

"Then I'm just telling you you're an asshole. Which you are." Neji bit out, and then looked away.

"You don't have to get angry now. And I already know you think I'm asshole, you've told me plenty of times before." Sasuke said.

"Once." Neji corrected Sasuke, not looking at the guy next to him.

"Jeez, you guys act like a love couple." Kiba said, frowning. "I really feel like giving you guys some unasked advise right now."

"Like what?" Sasuke asked. "We're not a love couple, not even close. And you said it more often Neji."

"You really have to have made me angry when I start swearing." Neji said. "I called you an asshole when we had a fight."

"Well you're mad at me a lot, so you must have called me an asshole a lot. Besides, you made 'me' angry." Sasuke said.

"How, by telling you the truth or saying something you don't agree with?" Neji asked, giving Sasuke a glare. Kiba and Suigetsu meanwhile shared some looks now.

"You don't tell me truth, you tell me what you think. And you're not getting that maybe I just don't agree with it." Sasuke said, slightly annoyed now.

"Funny that most people always agree with me and you are the one who's getting into fights." Neji said.

"Maybe most people are just scared you're gonna paralyze them after you accuse them of being a murderer." Sasuke said a little snappy.

"Fuck you Sasuke, I apologized for that so many times now." Neji suddenly snapped to Sasuke. "That you keep on bringing this up is plain childish."

"You keep bringing things about me up as well." Sasuke snapped back. "You keep accusing me of shit as well. So fuck you Neji."

"Because you don't change your impossible behaviour no." Neji snapped.

"I don't have impossible behaviour, you do. With your emotionless characteristics. You're the vaguest person I can imagine." Sasuke snapped back.

Neji glared at Sasuke and did so for a minute, with Sasuke glaring back at him. Just when Kiba opened his mouth to tell a joke Neji grabbed Sasuke at the collar, pulled him close and smashed his mouth onto his.

Sasuke immediately frowned as Neji did this and his only response was to kiss back. But it was awkward. Why did Neji suddenly kiss him like that? Suigetsu in the mean time laughed and whistled.

"...Weird." Kiba commented, as he saw the two pretty boys making out like they were starving for each other.

After a while, Sasuke broke the kiss and glared at Neji.

"What was that about?" He asked. Not that he minded. But it was still weird.

"Like you don't know." Neji snapped to Sasuke. "If you acted a little more grown up I would have asked you to be with me already." With that he stood and left to the kitchen, to help Karin with cooking. Kiba immediately looked at Sasuke.

"What was that about?" He then asked.

"I don't know, 'he' kissed me." Sasuke said, as he looked at Neji leaving. Did Neji just say he would have wanted to be with him if he hadn't acted like a child, putting it in Neji's words?

"Yeah and you kissed back, mister smarty-pants." Kiba said.

Shikamaru laughed a little at Kiba's comment, and then got up to bring his beer to the kitchen.

"Well... I already had sex with him, might as well kiss him too." Sasuke said.

"You had sex with Neji? When was that?" Suigetsu asked.

"I think it was this week." Kiba said, laughing a little. "Lucky bastard. I caught them together. But seriously Sasuke, what is going on with the two of you? Neji obviously wants more of you. What do you want?"

"I don't know." Sasuke said. "I mean, how could he even want more with someone who doesn't know who he is."

"Apparently, the person you are now is attractive to him." Kiba said, shrugging. "He's not interested in who you were Sasuke. He's interested in who you are 'now'."

"Just like all of us like you for who you are now." He added.

Sasuke looked at Kiba for a while then got up.

"I'm going out for a walk. Tell Neji to come find me when dinner's done." He said and walked out of the house. He needed time to think. And especially needed time to talk to Neji. He wasn't quite sure what he would say to him though.

* * *

><p>A few hours later, Sasuke was standing against a tree, thinking. And waiting for Neji. But he had a gut feeling Neji was not looking for him. At all. As he stood there silently for a while, he saw the person he wanted to talk to, pass by and he made a run for it. Neji didn't look like it, but he walked fast and he could be gone within a second.<p>

"Neji, wait up." Sasuke said as he was almost near Neji. They needed to talk.

Neji gave Sasuke a slight glare as he kept walking.

"Nice guy you are, you could also just tell me where you were hiding." He then said.

"I wasn't hiding." Sasuke said. "Besides, I don't think you were actually looking for me anyway. And I didn't know where I was gonna go."

"So I should just search through the whole village for you." Neji stated. "This'd better be good."

"You would have asked me to be with you if I acted more grown up." Sasuke just stated. He knew Neji could figure out what this conversation was gonna be about.

"Yes, so?" Neji asked, as he kept walking, but not as fast as he did first.

Sasuke just walked next to him.

"What does that mean? Are you in love with me?" Sasuke bluntly asked.

"I'm close to it but I'm sure it won't get further than that." Neji replied, his stoic face still on.

"What if I tell you that I wanna try?" Sasuke asked.

"What do you even want to try?" Neji asked, frowning. "What is there to try?"

"... Well us. Something more than friendship." Sasuke said. "I like you Neji."

Neji snorted.

"Sure Sasuke." He then said, not believing a thing of it. "And didn't you hear what I said? I don't think I could ever fall in love with you. Yes, there is a lot of attraction, but there are also points that make me want to back off. And not the normal amount that you have in a relationship."

Sasuke was silent for a while, then looked away offended.

"Tch fine. So you just think I'm hot but I'm a lousy person on the inside." He said. He wasn't going to admit that it hurt Neji thought of him the way he did. It sucked.

"I do like you, but there are a lot of things I'm sure I would get crazy of." Neji said.

"So you don't even want to try? You just assume I'm going to be a pain in the ass. How very nice of you Neji." Sasuke snapped.

"I tried to hang out with you more and that proved my point." Neji said.

"When did you hang out with me more?" Sasuke asked. "The only thing we did was... well have sex one time."

"Oh sure, we just jumped into the bed and then out of it again, that was all contact we had last week." Neji sarcastically said.

"Well pretty much, because the day after that we had a fight and I haven't spoken to you after that, until just now, where you kissed me and said you want me but think I'm not good enough for you." Sasuke snapped.

"It's not about being good enough for me, but about me not being able to handle you the way you are." Neji said.

"Newsflash, you don't 'need' to handle me, I'm not your child." Sasuke snapped.

"You act like one, so I have to." Neji said.

"That's bullshit." Sasuke snapped. "Just tell me that you don't even want this to work. All you wanted was a nice fuck, wasn't it? I mean, you said you wanted to do 'that' again."

"I think that there would be more people who wanted to have sex with me, so why would I go for you then?" Neji asked.

"'Cause I am good at it. What do you want Neji?" Sasuke asked. He was angry now.

"You to start acting like a grown up, I thought that was obvious." Neji said.

"... You just want me to say I won't be going anywhere. Because getting my memory back the way I think I have to, is not good enough for you." Sasuke snapped.

"It's not about your decisions, it's the way you decide things." Neji said. "You let your desires overcome your mind, and if you can't get what you want you grow angry. Simply said, you let your emotions overtake your mind far too often, like a child would do. And I can't talk or hang out with people like that. Because of so much expression of only emotion, I'll be reacting emotional as well and get angry."

"And you solve nothing with becoming angry." He added to it.

"Maybe you don't, I think I do." Sasuke said. "You won't solve 'anything' by waiting around and acting as if the world doesn't matter to you either." He then just walked past Neji. He was done with this. Tomorrow he would leave, on his own. He didn't need Neji telling him what was wrong with him. Neji'd better take a good look in the mirror before coming to conclusions.

"Then what do you solve with anger Sasuke, people getting scared or too angry to further argue with you?" Neji snapped as he followed Sasuke.

"It's my way of thinking things over." Sasuke snapped. "It's 'my' way of solving things and if you don't like it, then fine."

"Don't act like that now, you told me that I needed to change myself as well." Neji snapped. "It's a little easy to say 'that's how I am, accept it'. I thought you didn't know anything about yourself, how do you know it's 'your' way of solving things if you claim the whole time that you don't know who you are?"

"Because I don't, it was 'your' idea to try and be someone now, so that's who the person I am 'now' solves things." Sasuke snapped back. "And I am not going to change for you, because you won't change for me either."

"Who says that?" Neji snapped. "Did you hear me saying that I'm not willing to change for you?"

"You made it perfectly clear that you don't want me, so that means you can't adjust to me either and you're not planning to. 'I' had to change." Sasuke snapped.

"Would you want a relationship with someone who yells at you when you don't agree with him, is always angry at everyone, is only thinking of himself and who you can practically tell nothing without him exploding in anger?" Neji snapped now. "It doesn't matter what I say to you, it's not good."

"All you 'ever' said to me was accusations of me being an asshole and a child and shit like that, or you were telling me you understood but that I had to live my life 'now' and I just don't agree with it!" Sasuke yelled now.

"Sure Sasuke." Neji said. "Let it be. We don't agree with each other and have a different image of each other. You know what, you just go to this Orochimaru guy and let all those annoying persons behind who probably don't fit in your own life. You're forgetting that I am looking for a place to live, and you are looking for your memory. We have different goals. So perhaps it's better to part here."

"If you had paid attention then you knew I 'am' trying to change." Sasuke hissed. "But fine, if that's what you want now, then fine. Forget I ever said I liked you. I'll never make that mistake again with anyone." He just kept walking now.

"Then how are you trying to change?" Neji asked, frowning. "You're only telling me that it's the way you are and you don't know why you should change for me."

"Yeah because you don't notice it anyway. All you're gonna do is keep on accusing me of the same stupid things." Sasuke snapped. "You don't care that I wanted to talk to you, that I wanted to stay here for you even if that means I am not going to get my memory back. I thought it might have been wise to stay and try building up a new life, but you made me realise that I was right before. I need my memory back, and if that means leaving everyone behind in the process, then so be it. Those people couldn't care less anyway."

Neji snorted as he shook his head.

"If you're trying to make me feel guilty, you're failing miserably." He then said.

"I'm not trying to do anything. I'm telling you that I am leaving, so unless you have something useful to say now, fuck off." Sasuke said. He would not argue anymore with Neji. It was useless anyway. The guy was an emotionless idiot, who happened to be attractive as well.

"I don't." Neji shortly answered. "Then I wish you good luck with finding your memory back."

Sasuke didn't answer Neji anymore and finally got back to Karin's place. He would get some stuff and leave. After he had walked inside, he slammed the door closed in Neji's face. All this guy ever did was telling him how horrible he was. Sasuke figured he was pretty stupid himself to have ever considered falling for a guy like that.

Neji stared at the closed door in front of him for some time, before closing his eyes. The only thing he could do then was turn around and leave for the inn. He had no idea why he wanted Sasuke to change into a strong, loving person. But there was one thing he did know about the whole situation. He longed for someone strong who could protect him and who he could feel safe with... and he wouldn't be able to find that in someone who was still a child.

* * *

><p>"What do you mean you don't have a place for a loudmouth like me?" Sasuke snapped to an inn owner of a city he had just arrived in. He was tired as hell, having travelled on his own for four days without any sleep. After he had left Neji and the rest behind, he had decided he would walk for as long as possible, but right now he was exhausted. So he found a city, found an inn and got angry like he usually did because the inn owners were all just mental. And now he was refused (the fact that he didn't have enough money on him was also not doing him any good).<p>

"Don't worry Sasuke, I have a place for you." Sasuke turned around to see who had just spoken to him, and saw a man standing there with long black hair, a kind face and black eyes. The man was giving him a loving smile and looked very familiar to Sasuke.

Sasuke stared at the man for a while, his angry face changing into one of curiosity. He knew this guy. He knew him, that was for sure, otherwise the guy didn't know his name. And Sasuke felt he knew him as well, this man gave him a very... comfortable feeling. But from where did they know each other?

"Thanks.. Who are you?" He asked.

The smile disappeared from the man's face now, and was replaced with one of worry.

"...I knew you would be in a bad state, but that you wouldn't even remember me, I didn't expect.." The man said, looking back at Sasuke. "I'm Itachi, Sasuke. I'm your older brother."


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

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><p><em>"What do you mean you don't have a place for a loudmouth like me?" Sasuke snapped to an inn owner of a city he had just arrived in. He was tired as hell, having travelled on his own for four days without any sleep. After he had left Neji and the rest behind, he had decided he would walk for as long as possible, but right now he was exhausted. So he found a city, found an inn and got angry like he usually did because the inn owners were all just mental. And now he was refused (the fact that he didn't have enough money on him was also not doing him any good).<em>

_"Don't worry Sasuke, I have a place for you." Sasuke turned around to see who had just spoken to him, and saw a man standing there with long black hair, a kind face and black eyes. The man was giving him a loving smile and looked very familiar to Sasuke. _

_Sasuke stared at the man for a while, his angry face changing into one of curiosity. He knew this guy. He knew him, that was for sure, otherwise the guy didn't know his name. And Sasuke felt he knew him as well, this man gave him a very... comfortable feeling. But from where did they know each other?_

_"Thanks.. Who are you?" He asked._

_The smile disappeared from the man's face now, and was replaced with one of worry. _

_"...I knew you would be in a bad state, but that you wouldn't even remember me, I didn't expect.." The man said, looking back at Sasuke. "I'm Itachi, Sasuke. I'm your older brother."_

Sasuke felt his breath getting stuck in his lungs. This.. was his brother? He actually found a family member? And an important one at that too. For a minute, Sasuke had no clue what to say anymore.

"... My brother?" He asked. "You know me."

Itachi let out a slight chuckle.

"Of course I know you, I know you from the day you have been born." He said.

"Then tell me who I am." Sasuke demanded as he stood in front of Itachi now. He couldn't stop looking. This guy sure as hell was his brother. They looked alike too much to not be.

"...Did you lose your memory?" Itachi asked, frowning as he looked at Sasuke. "..You changed. Understandable, but.. until how far do you remember things?"

"I don't have any memories." Sasuke said. "All I know is I woke up a few weeks ago, next to some guy and we travelled and now I am here."

"So where is that guy now?" Itachi asked, as he inspected Sasuke on any wounds.

"I'm fine." Sasuke said, noticing the man was checking on him. "I left that guy in another city. He was annoying. Now tell me who I am. Please."

"It's hard to say now you changed." Itachi said. "..Let's go to my house and talk further. I came here to bring a message to the inn owner, which I did before you walked in. We have no further business here."

"Where do you live then? How come you weren't surprised to see me? I've been gone for weeks." Sasuke said. He needed to know everything. And he knew this... his brother would let him ask everything.

"I live close here." Itachi said. "My surprise was already gone after you started yelling to the inn owner. I guess you need to get to know me again, but I'm not exactly like you in personality. I'm like our mom, you are fierce as our dad."

"Then what was... 'our' mom like? And where are they? Are they here?" Sasuke asked. Would he meet his parents?

"Our mom was very calm, just the perfect person to calm our dad down." Itachi answered, as they left the inn. "I guess both you and dad need someone calm in a relationship. They passed away a few years ago."

Sasuke looked at Itachi and then looked away.

"Oh..." He said. He was disappointed he couldn't meet them anymore. But he was thinking of something else too. Neji was calm... if what Itachi was saying was true... then Neji would have been perfect for him.

"Don't worry, they're probably still watching over us." Itachi said, giving Sasuke a pat on the shoulder.

"Hm? Oh.. yeah." Sasuke said. "When did they die? And how? I mean... they can't have been very old."

"Two years back." Itachi said. "..Mom died from sadness, she missed you a lot. Dad passed away not long after, from a broken heart."

"... What do you mean she missed me a lot? Where was I?" Sasuke asked frowning.

"You left to get stronger." Itachi said, slightly sighing. "Dad had big expectations from both of us. You couldn't take it anymore and left to get stronger."

"I left?" Sasuke asked, frowning even more. "... To Orochimaru?"

"...Orochimaru?" Itachi asked, frowning deeply now. "You went to 'Orochimaru'? I didn't know that. You left, but that's all I know from the moment you left."

"Well I found out some things along the way." Sasuke said. "I was training... with Orochimaru apparently. Who is he anyway? All I know is that he experiments on people."

"Orochimaru is a criminal that has several deaths on his name." Itachi said. "...I never expected you to go to him out of all people." They were walking through several streets in the city Itachi lived in, heading towards Itachi's house. Itachi frowned in thought. "..But on the other hand, you were desperate for power."

"Was I?" Sasuke asked. "... Think maybe I left my brain here too then? I can't imagine I was so desperate for power that I would go to a criminal."

"Orochimaru is a very intelligent man, and that's exactly the reason why he can do what he is doing." Itachi said. "He must have been the reason that you lost your memory. Did something weird happen from the time you remember?" They passed a corner now, going straight towards a small but comfy looking house.

"Like what? I forget a whole day somewhere in the middle of it as well, but that was it. And this guy, Kabuto kept telling me I should go with him." Sasuke said. "Is that where you live?"

"Kabuto is Orochimaru's subordinate." Itachi said. "You shouldn't go there Sasuke. He only means bad things. And yes, that's my house I share with two others."

"That's nice. Who?" Sasuke asked. "And if I can't get my memory back, I'm gonna have to go there eventually."

"Why?" Itachi asked with a frown. "Do you really think that if he removed your memory on purpose, he will give it back to you?" Itachi opened the door of his house and let Sasuke in. They came into face with a hallway and stairs leading up to the second floor. At the end of the hallway was a door.

"Maybe he hasn't taken it on purpose. That Kabuto guy didn't know I lost my memory." Sasuke said.

"Then the chance is even less that you will get it back." Itachi said. "But let's talk about that after dinner. Do you want to drink something?" At that moment the door opened and a huge blue haired guy walked in, giving them both a grin that showed a mouth full of pointy teeth.

Sasuke looked at the guy with big eyes and took a step back.

"... What the hell is that?" He asked. Was Itachi keeping monsters in his house?

Itachi let out a snort while the guy laughed and came closer, putting an arm around Itachi.

"Who's this little guy, Itachi?" He asked. "He looks like you."

"It's my brother, Kisame." Itachi said, giving a slight smile. "Look Sasuke, this might be a little shocking, but Kisame's my lover."

Sasuke was silent for at least five minutes as he stared from Itachi to Kisame. What would a brother of his want with a guy like 'that'?

"What the hell..." He said. ".. Now I really think I need a drink."

Itachi let out a chuckle.

"Don't worry Sasuke, there's another one." He then said, as he turned around and walked towards the living room. Kisame just grinned and gave Itachi a slap on the ass.

"Well I'll be right back, going to get groceries." He said. With a wave of his hand, he left the house.

Sasuke looked at the guy leaving for a second, then followed Itachi.

"What do you mean there is another one?" He asked.

"You will see, he's probably in the kitchen or upstairs." Itachi said, as they walked into the living room. "What would you like to drink?"

"But what do you mean? What, you have two boyfriends?" Sasuke asked. "... I need water."

"Yes, it's a long story." Itachi said. "I'll be right back." He then walked towards the kitchen that was next to the living room.

Sasuke watched Itachi leave and then sat down on the couch. He wasn't sure what to think anymore. He found his brother, who had two boyfriends and his parents were dead. This was just plain weird. He then turned around as he heard Itachi talking to someone else. That must be the 'other' boyfriend.

Itachi then came walking into the living room, a blond guy following him.

"Well this is my brother Deidara." Itachi said, as he walked to Sasuke and handed him his glass of water.

Sasuke looked at the blonde, who looked back at him. The blonde, called Deidara, then spoke.

"Well what are you looking at un? I'm already taken by your brother." He said and smirked when he gave Itachi a slap on his ass. Sasuke just frowned awkwardly. Were they all spankers or something? And was Itachi... bottom with both of them?

"Stop doing that Deidara." Itachi said, a little annoyed, as he sat down next to Sasuke.

"Why, you let Kisame do it un." Deidara said as he sat down as well. "By the way, I thought you said your brother left four years ago."

"Kisame doesn't listen to me anyway." Itachi said. "And yes, I went to the inn and I saw him there. Apparently, he has been with Orochimaru all this time, and now lost his memory. And somehow he got out of Orochimaru's hands."

"Why are you with two guys? That's not normal.." Sasuke said, still not fully grasping it.

"Orochimaru? Your brother is nuts un." Deidara said shocked.

"I'll explain it later Sasuke." Itachi said. "And yes, but he doesn't remember that he has been training with him."

"Fine but tell me everything else then." Sasuke said. "I need to know who I am."

"It's a little hard to tell you who you are when you changed." Itachi said, pulling up an eyebrow. "What do you want to know?"

"Who I was back then. Four years ago... That's a long time." Sasuke said, thinking. "Were we ok?"

"We were more than ok, we were best friends." Itachi said, nodding.

"... Then why did I leave you behind too? Without telling you where I was going?" Sasuke asked. He knew he wasn't feeling comfortable with this man for no reason. Apart from being brothers, they had had a great bond.

"Because you knew I was going to murder Orochimaru for it." Itachi replied.

"Why? Apparently I decided to go there on my own. And if Orochimaru is as dangerous as I've heard, what could you have done about it?" Sasuke asked.

"Probably more then you, and that's exactly why you didn't tell me probably." Itachi said. "Orochimaru is strong, but I've heard that I'm stronger than he is. He can be defeated."

"If you're stronger then Orochimaru, why didn't I just train with you? I like you so it seems." Sasuke said.

"Because dad was very fond of me and not of you, I guess it was jealousy." Itachi explained, as he leaned back a little. "We did train, but I think it might have been too stressing for you to have dad watching."

"So I didn't like my father?" Sasuke asked. "And I was jealous of you?" When Itachi told him that, he could feel part of the jealousy come up again. His feelings somehow sometimes came back a little.

"Yeah you didn't really like him, but you didn't hate him either." Itachi said, nodding. At that moment, the door opened again and Kisame came walking in. He headed straight towards the kitchen, with the groceries.

".. Oh." Sasuke said. "And my mother? Did I like her?"

"Yes, you loved our mom." Itachi said, letting out a slight chuckle. "You never wanted to admit it, but you always went to her to cuddle a little and to let her cheer you up, especially when I was not home."

Sasuke smiled a little at that thought.

"I'm sure I didn't like to 'cuddle'." He said.

"You would have said that before too." Itachi said. Kisame now came walking into the room again and sat down next to Itachi, pulling him against him.

"So where's this kiddo going to sleep, in our guest room?" He asked. Itachi looked at Sasuke now.

"Would you like to stay here for some time?" He then asked.

"Kisame don't do that in front of guests un." Deidara immediately said and Sasuke couldn't help but see a little anger in the blonde's face. But he ignored it.

"Well I really need to sleep." He said. "I've been up for four days straight."

"That's fine." Itachi said. "We have a guest room and of course you can stay as long as you want. You said you've been up for four days? Orochimaru really did some changing on you, we could barely get you out of bed normally."

"... Well once I am asleep I won't wake up I've been told." Sasuke said. "I can just go without for days as well."

"That's a weird change." Itachi said, frowning.

"I wish 'you' had this much energy." Kisame told Itachi, grinning. He just gave Deidara a smirk when he saw the blonde getting red.

"Stop saying those things un." Deidara hissed at Kisame.

"Well I don't mind. I was on my own, if I had needed sleep I'd be dead by now." Sasuke said shrugging. "What else do you know? Like how I acted and such, what do you know about that?"

"You always wanted to be better than everyone else, you sometimes forgot your friends around you because you wanted to reach something, or hurt their feelings without realising it." Itachi said. "But you also could appreciate a nice laugh, and the two of us often had walks together. You were very popular with the ladies, but you refused to date girls."

"To mom's pleasure." He added, snorting afterwards and shaking his head.

"Why to her pleasure?" Sasuke asked. "Didn't she want grandchildren?" He hadn't changed that much, he could tell. He forgot his friends and hurt people's feelings. Maybe that happened with Neji as well. Somewhere, he regretted leaving. But he 'had' found his brother. And thus, part of who he was.

"She didn't really care, she wanted us to be happy." Itachi said, as he shook his head once more. "She said she always wanted to have a gay son, so she hoped you were gay. I didn't come out of the closet by that time."

"Then did they know you were gay?" Sasuke asked. "Because you obviously are." He looked at Kisame and Deidara now.

"I'm not known for expression a lot of emotions, so they thought I was just asexual." Itachi explained. "Kisame made me realise about my sexuality I guess."

Sasuke heard Deidara huff at this, but now was not the time to care about boyfriends of Itachi.

"What about dad, what did he think of you being 'asexual' and about me being gay?" He asked.

"Well he hoped we were both just straight." Itachi said, shrugging. "You never openly said you were gay, and I simply never talk about my feelings."

"Boy was he wrong." Sasuke said. "Can you tell me 'why' you have two boyfriends now?"

"Kisame was looking for someone to live in his house and I moved in, so after some time it just happened." Itachi said, shrugging. "Not long after Deidara moved in as well and it clicked with the three of us."

"Yeah but I mean... you can't really have two boyfriends. I mean what did you say, let's have a threesome?" Sasuke asked frowning. Kisame and Deidara didn't seem to click. Not really that is.

"Deidara wanted it but I'm very loyal to Kisame." Itachi said. "This was the only way to solve it and Kisame doesn't mind an extra guy in bed."

Deidara looked at Itachi for a while and then got up, leaving for the kitchen. He didn't seem too happy about that comment.

"You keep on pissing him off, is that normal with the three of you?" Sasuke asked.

"Deidara is pissed off already when we don't give him attention for five minutes." Itachi said.

"It's a jealous bitch, I tell you." Kisame said, as he moved his hand over Itachi's knee. "He doesn't like it that most of the time he is too shy to sit with Itachi and touch him like I do. It pisses him off."

"It's not very nice to talk about him like that now is it?" Sasuke asked. "Anyway, can I eat something? I'm starving."

"Deidara would cook today, right?" Kisame asked Itachi.

"Yes, but I think it's more wise if you do it, you know what happened last time he cooked." Itachi said, nodding to Kisame, to which Kisame stood.

"Fine, I'll tell him to get into the living room again." With that he walked towards the kitchen, following Deidara.

"Are you sure you like 'both' of them?" Sasuke asked, speaking a little softer then before and leaning a little closer to Itachi so he would hear it.

"Yes, definitely." Itachi answered, looking at Sasuke. "Kisame is very kind and protective, but Deidara is holding the man side of me up."

"Do you love them?" Sasuke asked.

"...Yes." Itachi said, smiling a little. "A lot. Nearly as much as I love you."

Sasuke looked at Itachi and had the urge to hug him. He was holding back though. He was not some five year old.

"... Uhm.." He just said. What should he say, 'I love you too'? He didn't know that. He wasn't sure of that at least.

"Don't worry Sasuke, I know it's like you're talking to a stranger." Itachi said.

"... Don't you mind?" Sasuke asked. "... I feel comfortable around you but... I really don't know you anymore."

Itachi chuckled a little and then ruffled Sasuke's hair.

"You're still my brother." He then said. "And even if you don't get your memory back, we could make new nice memories for you, right?"

Sasuke smiled now.

"Right. I think I'll get used to you very fast." He said. He knew the feelings he might once have had for Itachi would come back soon. He could feel that. Sadly his brain wasn't as fast as his heart was.

* * *

><p>A few days later, Sasuke was walking through the hallways, still in his pyjamas. He was starving and Itachi nor Kisame or Deidara were downstairs. And he didn't know how to cook. So he walked to their bedroom and without knocking, opened the door. What he saw, he could have expected. But he hadn't. Deidara was laying on his stomach, seemingly annoyed and reading a book. Itachi was sleeping in Kisame's arms. But the worst part was, Sasuke could tell they were all naked and only some thin sheets covered their butts and.. well other parts.<p>

"..Err... sorry.." Sasuke said. ".. But I'm hungry.."

Kisame opened his eyes at that moment, and looked at Sasuke.

"Go downstairs, we'll be there in a minute." He said, and smirked. "It mostly takes some time before Itachi is up."

Sasuke nodded and quickly left the room, closing the door behind him. He didn't plan on looking at that any longer.

"You shouldn't smirk at him, you freak him out un." Deidara said, not looking up from his book.

"I think you freak him out more with that angry look on your face." Kisame said, slightly laughing, as he sat up. He then moved Itachi around a little, who let out a groan. "Itachi, wake up. Our guest is hungry."

"I wouldn't be angry if you didn't constantly claim Itachi for your own un." Deidara said and shook Itachi a little. "You need to stop laying in Kisame's arms and feed your brother." He said to Itachi.

"Then do your best a little more blondie." Kisame said, as he stretched, and as to prove his point, he gave Itachi a firm smack on the butt when he turned around, and then got out of bed.

Itachi groaned and pushed himself up, rubbing his eyes a little.

"Shut up Kisame un." Deidara hissed now and then sat up. "Let's go downstairs Itachi." He grabbed Itachi's hand, urging him to get up completely.

Itachi chuckled a little now.

"What, you want to go down naked?" He asked, as he got up anyway. He walked to their wardrobe and got out all three of their bathrobes and some underwear.

"No but I want to go downstairs before you and Kisame have sex without me again." Deidara said. "Give me my robe un." He got up from the bed now.

"Oh come on Deidara, we'll have our turn tonight." Itachi said, as he gave Deidara his robe and even put it onto him. "Me and Kisame already said that you can join us too, but you don't want that. You really have to try it once Dei.."

"We did that once and you and Kisame ended up having sex together anyway un." Deidara said, slightly annoyed as he let Itachi put his robe on. He liked it when Itachi treated him like that.

Itachi now turned Deidara around, looking at him.

"It's because you had a quick orgasm and didn't want to continue, remember." He then said. "Suck it up Deidara. I hate to say this to you, but I'm with Kisame as well."

"Oh I know that very well un. Very 'very' well." Deidara said and turned away from Itachi, taking his boxers and putting them on. This was not a nice way to get out of bed. And it happened more and more often.

Itachi sighed, as he put on his boxers and robe as well. Just like Kisame was doing now.

"You should hurry it up, Sasuke wants to have breakfast. And I am no longer allowed to cook, because I 'suck at it' un." Deidara said, giving Kisame a look.

"I'd like to keep my kitchen in tact, thank you." Kisame said, as he walked out of the door and downstairs now. Itachi just gave Deidara a look and then a kiss on the mouth, before following Kisame downstairs.

Deidara grumbled as he walked downstairs as well and sat down in the living room, where Sasuke was as well.

".. Morning." He said, still feeling awkward about what he had seen.

"Good morning." Itachi said. "Shall I make some eggs for everyone?" Kisame nodded in agreement, as he started setting the table.

"Yes." Sasuke said. "Finally some food." He got up to help Kisame set the table. In the few days he had been with Itachi and his boyfriends, Sasuke had felt more and more at ease. It made him friendlier, he could tell.

"So what are you planning to do now?" Kisame asked Sasuke. "Do you want to live here for a long time or are you planning on leaving again?"

"I don't know. I'm enjoying myself here." Sasuke answered. "But I still feel like I want my memory back."

"So you think that this guy will snap his fingers and then you have it back?" Kisame asked.

"I don't know. There has to be a way to get it back." Sasuke said shrugging. "I guess it won't be easy."

"I doubt it that it will be easy." Kisame said. "Even if he could give you your memory back, you probably have to pay a big prize."

"Well.. I still want it back. He pretty much has to ask me to sacrifice someone else for me not to do it." Sasuke said.

"I think he might earlier ask you to sacrifice yourself for him." Kisame said, dead serious.

"Well that would be stupid. What good would my memory do me when I'm dead?" Sasuke asked.

"I mean that he might want you to work for him forever." Kisame said, as he sat down at the table, leaning back. "May you ever go there, be sure to take us with you. You can't handle him alone."

"I'll think about it, thanks." Sasuke said and sat down as well. It didn't take long before Deidara sat down too.

Some minutes later, Itachi came walking in, carrying breakfast with him.

"How did you sleep, Sasuke?" He asked.

"I slept well." Sasuke said. "... How about you?" He wasn't sure whether he should ask or not, but it was still polite to do so.

"Yes, me too." Itachi said, nodding.

At that moment, someone knocked on the door. Deidara got up to open it and the other three didn't really pay attention to it anymore. Until Deidara came back with some people. "They said they wanted to see you Sasuke un." Deidara said and when Sasuke looked up, the first person he saw was Kiba.

"What are you doing here?" He asked surprised.

"Man, I'm glad we found you." Kiba said, frowning a little. "You might wonder why I'm telling you, but it's because it could have nothing to do with one of us, but only with you. That Kabuto guy appeared again. And he took Neji."

Sasuke was silent for a while before he got up. "What do you mean he took Neji? How can he take Neji?" Sasuke asked. Concern bottled up inside of him. Was Neji hurt?

"Kabuto just appeared, grabbed Neji and then they disappeared together." Kiba said, as he shook his head. "We didn't even have time to blink, it went so fast."

".. When was that?" Sasuke asked, looking at Itachi as if asking him what to do with this.

"Three days back." Kiba said. "Thank god I have a good nose, else we wouldn't have found you this fast."

"... Well that was fast, it took me four days." Sasuke said frowning. "Does anyone know where Orochimaru lives?"

"You're not going there Sasuke." Itachi said, giving Sasuke a stern look. Kiba frowned slightly. "Who are these guys anyway?" He asked. "...You and this guy smell very much alike. Family?"

"Stop smelling things." Sasuke said. "But yes, he's my brother. And I am going, he has Neji."

"I thought that Orochimaru guy was dangerous un." Deidara said.

"He is dangerous." Itachi said. "Who is this Neji guy?"

"..The guy I travelled with." Sasuke said. "And he might be dangerous, but I'm still going."

"The one you woke up next to?" Itachi asked, frowning slightly. "I thought you left because of him. Don't you hate him?"

".. No I don't hate him. I never said I hated him. And I left because he was holding me back, that's all." Sasuke said. "But I can't exactly let him die because of me."

"I think Sasuke and Neji are in love but are too stubborn to admit it to each other." Kiba said, shrugging, which lead almost everyone in the room to pull up an eyebrow.

Sasuke glared at Kiba now. "That is not true." He said. "Neji and I are not in love."

"Then why did you almost kill me when I started talking about Neji's lovely butt?" Kiba asked, giving Sasuke a smug look. "And then why did Neji's heart beat faster when you entered the room? Why did both of you become nervous around each other?"

"..Tch well.. I don't know how you came up with that kind of stuff, but it's not true." Sasuke said. "And it's just not very nice to talk about someone else's butt."

Deidara started laughing now. "... Sorry.." He said when Sasuke glared at him. "It's just very funny, the way you're denying it un."

"It's a little too obvious Sasuke, why are you so against it?" Kisame asked, as he leaned back on the chair he was sitting on.

"I'm not against anything." Sasuke hissed. "We weren't a good fit ok? We talked about it, but we weren't a good fit, so I left. Happy now?"

"Very, I'm cheering my head off, do you see it?" Kiba asked, sweatdropping. "Of course you didn't really work out now. You were only busy with finding your memory back and Neji was desperate for someone to love him and take care of him, and get over everything he lost."

"Well I don't need relationship therapy, so if you don't mind, I'll be getting my stuff to get Neji out of there." Sasuke said and turned around to walk to his room.

Kiba smacked himself against the head, before suddenly grabbing his shoe and tossing it against Sasuke's head. "Damn you, ignorant bastard, why don't you wake up once?" He snapped. "We're trying to 'help' you, ever heard of that? No need to feel attacked so quickly and become angry. Asshole. Just try to accept people doing stuff for you."

Sasuke put his hand on the spot Kiba's shoe had hit him on the head and looked at him. "What exactly were you gonna do? If you're not going to come with me and help free Neji, then you're not helping." Sasuke said.

"Oh so now the guy suddenly is important to you, now he got taken away?" Kiba asked with a frown. "What will you do when you got him out of there, snap at him to not get captured again and storm away?"

"I don't know what I will do yet, but I'm sure as hell not going to wait around until I won't even 'get' the chance to get him out of there." Sasuke said. "And mind you, he was 'always' important." He now stormed up the stairs.

"...He's just as stressed as before." Itachi said with a frown. He then got up and followed Sasuke up the stairs, to the guest room, where Sasuke was violently packing his stuff. "Sasuke. I don't want you to go, but I understand that this person is important to you. That's why I want to ask you to wait for a little while, so we can get you to get back your powers. Then at least you can defend yourself, if it's ever needed."

"I don't have time to wait and figure out what my powers were." Sasuke said. "Neji's in danger." He kept on packing his stuff.

"How do you know?" Itachi asked, frowning. "What if they're just keeping him hostage to lure you towards them?"

"They still might experiment on him. They could still hurt him." Sasuke said. "It's not like they're gonna give him a cup of tea and wait for me to come."

"You don't know Orochimaru Sasuke." Itachi said. "What do you want to do, march in and get overpowered as well and thrown into a cage? Is that what you want?"

"Of course that's not what I want, you know as well as I do I wasn't even planning on going there anymore." Sasuke said. "But I can't have Neji suffer because of me. And from what I've heard about Orochimaru and how I feel about that name, I 'know' Neji will suffer."

"Think clearly Sasuke, use your mind." Itachi said. "I know you're not stupid. If you go there unprepared, be prepared that Neji will suffer even more."

"Then what am I supposed to do?" Sasuke now yelled, throwing some of his new clothes on the floor. "I can't remember those stupid powers, I couldn't remember 'anything' up to now, who says I will ever figure them out? All I will have done by then is having Neji suffer while I'm here trying to remember things!"

"Sasuke, did you forget that I've been at your side for nearly all your life?" Itachi asked, frowning even deeper. "I 'know' what your powers are."

"...Right. But I've been training for four years and you know nothing about those powers." Sasuke said, then sighed and put his backpack away. "...What do you know?"

Itachi looked at Sasuke for some time and then turned around.

"Let's go outside." He then said, walking out of the room.

Sasuke followed Itachi now, not knowing what he was thinking. He should get his anger solved somehow. He would just forget everything and get led by anger.

"Tell me what you know." Sasuke said.

"First I want to teach you a lesson in respect." Itachi said, turning around to Sasuke. "I noticed that you order everyone around, and you're not showing respect to anyone. This will make a lot of people dislike you and they won't even think of becoming friends. And before you get angry, this is to help you in the future. No one wants to end up alone."

Sasuke looked away now and took a deep breath. He really had to put everything into not getting angry now.

"I respect people." He said.

"People feel disrespected by you." Itachi simply said. "It's that I know you don't mean it like that, else even I would feel offended. Just so you know Sasuke. Now, for your powers. Just like everyone in our family, you're very talented with fire. It's probably one of the reasons why you get angry so fast, fire is everywhere in you, especially because the stress you're having now. With us Uchiha's, it's important to have control over your temper. Because if you get angry fast, this anger only grows, until you literally start spitting fire."

".. We can spit fire? Karin told me I had told her I use fire. But I don't know how. I've tried, but it didn't work." Sasuke said.

"You once learned the basics, so I'm sure that when you're doing it, you remember how to use it the right way." Itachi said. "Look at an object, that tree for example, and try to imagine it lit fire. And it helps to think of as if it's someone who you hate. Call up your anger. The angrier you are, the more powerful the fire will be."

"I don't hate anyone right now." Sasuke said. Nonetheless he looked at the tree and let all his frustrations out in his glare. He could see it, that tree on fire, but nothing was happening. Which frustrated him even more.

"Imagine Orochimaru hurting Neji." Itachi then said.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes and immediately the tree set on fire and Sasuke had to take a step back. At first, he wanted to ask Itachi what to do, but somehow he knew. He knew how to control it, it was like that part of his memory was rushing back to him. He dimmed the fire and looked at Itachi silently.  
>Itachi looked into Sasuke's eyes, and after a few seconds, the world suddenly started turning around Sasuke and trees started falling out of the air. Rain started to shot up from the ground and Itachi suddenly started growing. He was looking at Sasuke intensely.<p>

Sasuke frowned now. This didn't scare him for some reason. And it seemed very familiar. Was this one of 'his' powers as well?

"How do you do this?" He asked Itachi.

"It's one of our family traditions as well." Itachi said. "Hypnoses. This is the only way to let you learn this again. Try to fight the illusions. Put them back to normal. Or put illusions around me, I won't suppress it."

Sasuke looked at Itachi and for some reason, this as well came back to him. It didn't take long before he was the one having captured Itachi, bound with ropes. He then undid the illusions.

"I remember this." Sasuke said.

Itachi let out a snort.

"Seems like you don't have really nice thoughts." He then said. "You were experimenting with this around the time you left."

"Was I good at it?" Sasuke asked. "And what else do you know?"

"The only other talent we have is that we can speak with cats, one thing you were perfect at." Itachi said, letting out a chuckle, as he let the trees and rain disappear, and grew his normal size again. "When we were young you'd rather talk to cats then to the other kids. You were good at illusions, but to your frustration not the best."

".. Cats?" Sasuke asked, frowning a little. "Was that all I was perfect at? Talking to cats? No wonder I left to get better." He gave Itachi a slight grin now.

"Exactly what dad said." Itachi said. "You were good with fire and also with illusions, but you were not the best. I don't doubt it that you got better during your training with Orochimaru."

"I don't know. But I didn't need much training. If you had just said it would take this little time, I wouldn't have gotten so angry." Sasuke said.

"That's why you need to listen to what the other has to say first, and think of it, before relying on your emotions." Itachi said. He took a step forwards and put an arm onto Sasuke's shoulder. "Relax. It's going to be ok."

Sasuke did relax now and then looked at Itachi.

"Are you going to come with me?" He asked.

"Of course." Itachi said. "What a question. I would do something to you if you left to him again without me."

Sasuke smiled slightly.

"Well you never know right. Let's get ready." He said and walked back to the house. For the first time he forgot about his memory. Itachi was making him a better guy.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

* * *

><p>With heavy thuds in his head, Neji woke up on a stone floor. For a moment he thought he was still sleeping or having lost his sight, since it was dark in front of his eyes. As soon as he came back to his senses completely, he realized he was tied up and there was also a blindfold in front of his eyes. Whoever had put him in this situation, he knew about his powers. And that made him even more anxious than he could be. As he was wondering about who his captor was, he heard footsteps coming closer to his cell. After some seconds he knew that for some reason, this person knew he had woken up.<p>

It didn't take long before the footsteps stopped, right in front of Neji's cell and then someone spoke.

"Hello Neji." A deep, sinister voice said. There was even a slight slither in his voice.

Neji moved his head up a little as he frowned. This voice.. it didn't sound familiar at all. He never had met anyone with a voice that was so much alike a snake's hiss.

"...Who are you?" He asked. He needed to find out what was going on, for his own sake. He did know that he was in serious trouble.

"That is not of your concern." The voice said. "What is of your concern is that right now, you are being taken hostage. I'm waiting for someone who has a certain liking to you, you see."

Neji was silent for some time, as he sat up with some difficulty.

"Who are you talking about?" He then asked as he was testing his ropes. This was really bad.

"You'll see who I mean. Or maybe not." The voice said and you could hear he was enjoying this. "I want to ask you to be patient and hope for this person to come for you. Otherwise, we might have to hurt you."

"...Don't tell me you're Orochimaru." Neji said, as he came to the conclusion that this must be about Sasuke. Everyone else he knew and who could possibly care about him, were dead. And it was not like he and Kiba had the best bond ever.

"Just pray he will come for you, or things might not turn out too well for the both of you. And I think you wouldn't want yourself 'or' him to get hurt." The person said.

"You're talking like you can't wait for it." Neji said, frowning a little. How did he get into here in the first place? The last thing he remembered that he had been grabbed from behind and that his eyes had been covered, while he was with the group he had been hanging out with for some time.

"No I can't wait for it. He is very important to me you see." The person said. "And Kabuto took you."

"Then those were my questions." Neji said. For now, he just wanted the man to leave. He didn't feel comfortable now that he didn't even know if there was a cell bar between the two of them, how close the man was standing and the fact that he couldn't see any possible attack coming. And the guy being able to read his mind didn't help either.

Suddenly, a cold, slightly moist hand was planted on Neji's cheek.

"Now now, don't be so hostile. I won't hurt you yet." The person said.

Neji immediately got the shock of his life as he jumped and immediately pushed himself backwards, away from the hand that felt like it was dead.

"Don't touch me." He snapped, forgetting his normal calm facade because of the sudden shock he had endured.

The person now laughed a little. It was just as sinister as his voice.

"Don't be scared. It's just a hand." The person said.

"Just go away." Neji said as he moved backwards even more. This person was invading his personal space and he didn't like it one bit. Especially now he couldn't even defend himself. And it was obvious that the guy didn't just want a chat with him during his stay here. He had to be careful. "I don't want you to come closer."

"Don't you now? Sadly enough for you, you don't get a say in this. But I will not hurt you now." The person said. "You just pray your little hero will turn up soon."

"What are you planning with him?" Neji asked, narrowing his eyes behind the blindfold. "I swear, if you hurt him..."

The person laughed again now.

"Yes you would hate that wouldn't you? If only the two of you had stuck together. Maybe this wouldn't have happened." The person said. "I am only planning on getting him back. You see I'm not done with him yet."

"I thought you were just his trainer." Neji said. "Your student wished to leave, you should respect that." Of course there was more to it, but this was as this guy had claimed it to be. It obviously wasn't exactly his role in Sasuke and Orochimaru's relationship.

"He knew what he was getting into when he started. But I will leave you now." The person said. "You just pray and I will see you later. Goodbye Neji." And with that, the footsteps made clear he was leaving.

Neji frowned as he listened to the person departing. He wondered if Sasuke would even notice that he was gone, if he would even know. And if so.. would he come for him?

* * *

><p>Later that day, everyone had gathered in the living room. Itachi had called them all together to think of a plan to save Neji. As Sasuke sat down he thought of possible ways to do so. But for them to rescue Neji, they needed to know where he was. And they had no clue besides it was somewhere in the area where Karin lived. Sasuke felt frustrated not even knowing where to go.<p>

"Alright, I think it's best to start this with Karin." Itachi said, giving Karin a nod. "Orochimaru is currently having his base close to your village. The only thing you know is that he was close there, is that correct?" Karin nodded at this.

"Perhaps some of the villagers know where he's hiding." She said. "It wouldn't surprise me, with all those creeps."

"You were living in a city with creeps un?" Deidara asked.

"Well do you think they will tell us? I didn't tell you either right?" Sasuke asked. He wondered if anyone who didn't personally know Orochimaru would know of the place. Criminals mostly hid themselves very well.

"I don't think the chances would be very high they would betray him, if they were friends with him." Itachi said. He then looked to the big blue haired man sitting next to him. "Kisame, you knew Orochimaru, right?"

"Yeah, back in the day, we belonged to the same organisation. He went nuts though." Kisame answered, nodding. "I did learn a lot about him though. Like he lives underground, where it's moist and there are always lots of snakes around the places he is."

"Why didn't you say that before?" Sasuke asked frowning.

"It's not like it would lighten something up before." Itachi said, defending Kisame. "So we should look for places underground. Kisame, do you still have something that could possibly have Orochimaru's scent in it?"

"I don't know." Kisame said. "Maybe the robe I once stole from him." He smirked a little now. "It should be somewhere in the back of my closet."

"That would be great, because then we could go to Karin's village and let Kiba do all the work on finding the snake hole." Itachi said.

"I'll get it before we leave." Kisame said nodding.

"Then what do we do when we find it?" Sasuke asked.

"I think it would be best to just march inside and act like you're returning after a long break." Itachi said. "That way, any possible guards could let you through. Kiba told me that Neji has given him some medicines once, in a piece of cloth that he tore off of his own clothes. So Kiba could find Neji in there as well."

Kiba sweatdropped now.

"Why shouldn't I just follow Neji's scent in the first place?" He then asked.

"...It seems like my mind left me for some seconds, you're right Kiba." Itachi said, letting out a chuckle.

"Yeah, but me bringing in all of you is going to be a little suspicious. That wouldn't make a lot of sense. We can't possibly all go in there." Sasuke said.

"At least take Kiba with you, he can act like he's just your new pet." Itachi said.

Sasuke snorted now.

"You can just all take guard outside, might something go wrong, I'm sure you'll march in anyway." He said.

"We should have at least some ways how to contact each other." Itachi said.

"Maybe we could buy some of those plugs for your ear or something un." Deidara said.

"What?" Kiba asked, obviously never have heard of that.

"Well we can't get them in town, so that means we have to go to a big city.. can we risk that?" Itachi asked.

"I don't know un." Deidara said shrugging. "But how else were you gonna keep contact? None of us are teleporters and we can't connect through our minds and such."

"I could howl when we need help." Kiba said, shrugging. "My howl is very loud."

"Yeah but what if we just can't get out because we'll get spotted? Then your howl will only get us in more trouble." Sasuke said.

"I think that as soon as Kiba howls Itachi will be there, killing everyone." Kisame said, grinning. "Don't worry about that, Sasuke."

"Yeah well a quiet escape would still be better." Sasuke said. "The least people get killed, the better."

"Do you want Neji out as soon as possible or not?" Kiba asked. "And if people get killed, Orochimaru knows to not mess with you."

"He knows not to mess with Itachi. I want him out, but I would like a clean escape. So make sure you only howl when it's really necessary." Sasuke said.

"If you tell me to howl, I will." Kiba said, nodding to Sasuke.

Sasuke nodded back.

"Do we need to discuss anything else? Because I want to go and get Neji out of there." He said.

"I think that's all." Itachi said, as he got up. "So basically, we stay close while you and Kiba go in. When you need help, Kiba howls and we come rushing in. And as soon as you come out with Neji, it's the most important that you and Kiba get out of there as soon as possible with Neji. We'll keep them off and then follow you."

"Right." Sasuke said. "... Maybe Karin should stay somewhere else. You can heal right? Neji might need that."

"That would be smart." Karin said. "I still know some people in the village. We could say we go there."

"Alright. Then can we go save Neji now?" Sasuke asked.

"Let's go." Kisame said, as he stood as well. Everyone immediately did the same, all ready to save the cocky brunette.

* * *

><p>At the end of the day, when it was already becoming dark, Sasuke and Kiba had finally infiltrated Orochimaru's hide out. Itachi and the others were hiding and Karin was waiting for them to return a good ten minute run from this bunker. Now it was time to pretend Sasuke had come back and then get Neji out of there. Sasuke was worried sick though, when he saw the hide out. It was familiar, he could remember the smell and the lack of sun in it. His eyes didn't need a whole lot of adjustment to how dark it really was, even with some lights on. But he could also feel that this place would not be very pleasant for anyone. Not even for a few days. Neji was in trouble.<p>

"We need to hurry." Sasuke said, walking fast. He remembered the hallways when he passed through them.

"Get on my back, I'll run there." Kiba said. He got the chills from this place. It was cold, moist and it smelled in there. The darkness was already driving him insane. But Neji's scent got stronger and stronger. He knew they were close, but he also smelled a lot of blood with it as well.

Sasuke immediately got on Kiba's back, who was in his wolf form. Some people looked at them oddly as they passed by, but apparently, they had expected him to come back at some point, since no one said anything.

"Are we close?" Sasuke asked Kiba.

"Just some more minutes." Kiba said as he started running. "But I have to warn you Sasuke... there's blood as well. Lots of it. I just hope it's not all Neji's, this moist air mixed all scents together. It's hard to pick out how much of the blood that's in the area Neji is in, is his."

"As long as he's not dead, he'll be fine." Sasuke said. Neji'd better not be dead. If he was, there was going to be hell to pay. It didn't take long, before Kiba stopped in front of a cell and when Sasuke looked inside, he saw Neji laying on the cold floor. He was bruised, cut up and blood was definitely spilled. Sasuke felt anger rise up. It was a good thing he could use it now to burn down the cell bars. They melted within seconds.

Sasuke then rushed to Neji's side.

"Neji. Get up." Sasuke said, checking if Neji was still breathing.

Neji let out a slight moan, moving his head just slightly, while trying to open his eyes.

"...We should get him out of here as soon as possible." Kiba said. "You two have to sit down onto my back and I'll make a run for it. Let's hope that not too many of them follow us."

Sasuke nodded as he picked Neji up and then sat down on Kiba's back. He looked down at Neji and saw that Neji looked horrible. They had to hurry, all the wounds on his body looked infected.

Just when Kiba turned around and wanted to start running, there suddenly was a person standing right in front of them, leaning against one of the muddy walls in the cell area. The man was paler then milk, looked just as sweaty as everyone else they had seen walking around, but this guy had a confident en especially comfortable look on his face that should be considered abnormal in an area like this. What was even more disturbing, was the smirk that was on the person's face, framed by slick black hair that was reaching the guy's waist.

"Interesting." The guy said, letting out a chuckle right after. Something that normally should be a pleasant sound, now could make people shiver in fear.

Sasuke looked at the guy surprised. He knew who this guy was. The memory of him came back to him instantly as he saw this man's appearance. It was Orochimaru.

"What do you want?" He snapped, holding Neji tighter.

"Nothing in general." Orochimaru said, smirking broadly at Sasuke. "I'm just observing your actions. You must care a lot about the boy hm. I thought you had let go of your emotions completely."

"What do you mean I let go of my emotions completely?" Sasuke asked. He wasn't scared of Orochimaru. If he was perfectly honest, he wanted to hear more. But maybe now he should leave and get Neji better. Neji was more important right now.

"My my, so it was true what Kabuto told me." Orochimaru said, letting out a laugh. "You really lost your memory. Interesting. I never knew 'it' could have that much of an effect. I guess then you're losing your memory once in a while again as well, huh?"

"...Sasuke, we have to go." Kiba said, sounding a little worried.

Sasuke looked at Orochimaru a little longer, but then put aside the fact that Orochimaru just gave him hints that he knew more. Lots more. But they needed to get out and fast.

"Just run Kiba. Go." Sasuke said. He needed to ignore the urge to stay and ask more.

Orochimaru gave them one last smirk as Kiba started running as hard as he could, towards the exit. Orochimaru then disappeared. They were outside in a second, surprisingly enough not being bothered by any of Orochimaru's guards. It was like they didn't care that one of the prisoners was escaping, or they had been ordered to do nothing.

Once they reached Itachi and the others, Sasuke made Kiba stop for just a second. "We need to hurry as you can see, will we meet you later?" Sasuke asked. He didn't want to have Neji wait for some healing.  
>"Sure, just hurry." Itachi said, nodding, and he and his group immediately head off.<br>Sasuke and Kiba rushed off as well. All Sasuke could do now, was hope Karin could get Neji fixed up. And all he could hope for was that his memory would come back, without having to go back to Orochimaru. Because if it wouldn't, the only person left to turn to, would be him.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Neji woke up, feeling immensely comfortable - the opposite of how he had felt during the last days. After the torture he had endured and being used to sleep on the cold floor, the soft and warm bed he woke up in welcomed him in a very pleasant way. And when he opened his eyes he saw something even more pleasant: there was a handsome raven sitting next to his bed.<p>

Said raven, didn't notice Neji was awake again, until he directed his head to look at him and found bright white eyes staring at him.

"You're awake." He said, quickly letting go of the hand he had been holding.

"...Good observation." Neji said with a hoarse voice, letting out a slight chuckle.

"Shut up Neji." Sasuke said, but smiled anyway. "How are you feeling?"

"Sore, but better than before." Neji said. "...Thanks for getting me out of there."

"Who says I did that." Sasuke said and looked at Neji. He then softly grabbed his hand again. He might as well just go for it.

"..I saw you." Neji said, as he moved his head back a little. "You told me to wake up."

"..Oh so you did notice that." Sasuke said. "Do you remember anything after that?" He didn't want Neji to know he had met Orochimaru.

Neji shook his head now.

"I guess I passed out not long after." He answered.

"Ok. Well we got out as you can see. Karin healed you." Sasuke said.

"...How did she get here?" Neji asked, frowning slightly as he tried to sit up. He still felt very sore, but he was sure he could do this.

Sasuke helped him sit up and put a pillow behind Neji's back.

"When Kiba and Karin saw you getting kidnapped, they left to get me." Sasuke said. "We're in her old hometown."

"How did you find Orochimaru's base?" Neji asked as he put the covers over himself.

"Long story. We found out where there are snakes, Orochimaru is. And Kiba smelled you." Sasuke said.

"…Right." Neji said, nodding. "Smart move to use Kiba for that."

"Yeah well none of us have that nose." Sasuke said, grinning. "You know, I found someone very important when I left."

"...Who?" Neji asked, looking at Sasuke.

"My brother." Sasuke answered. "Apparently I have one."

Neji furrowed his brows now.

"You're lucky, how did you meet him?" He asked. "How is he?"

"He's... great." Sasuke admitted. "He told me we were best friends before I left. I never told him where I was going."

"Do you know why you never told him?" Neji asked, frowning a little. "And how did he cope with you leaving?"

"I don't know why I didn't tell him. He told me I used to be jealous of him. He was better at everything. Maybe that's why." Sasuke answered. "And actually... I don't know how he was coping. I do know that now, he has two boyfriends."

"...Perhaps he has those boyfriends because he missed you so much?" Neji asked, after a short silence.

"I don't know..." Sasuke said. He never even thought of that. "... He told me my mother died because I left."

"..And your father?" Neji asked, a little worried now.

"Died from a broken heart. I guess I killed him too. Or at least that's how it feels to me." Sasuke answered. Even though he had no clue who his parents were, it wasn't the nicest thought that because he left, they had died.

"You could never know that would happen Sasuke.. I can't imagine you were cruel enough to leave while knowing your parents would die from grief." Neji said, as he shook his head. "It's sad to hear they died, but you can't help that."

Sasuke shook his head.

"Doesn't mean it doesn't feel like that. From everything I've heard so far, I must have been a pretty rotten person." He said.

"Have been yes, but you're not anymore." Neji said. "Never heard of that you have to learn of the mistakes in your past?"

Sasuke looked at Neji now, frowning slightly.

"Since when do you think positive things about me?" He asked.

"...I have been thinking in that cell." Neji said, shrugging. "..I have to stop with judging you. I noticed that I missed you, and I missed you for you. I didn't miss someone who comes close to my expectations, but I missed 'you'. I won't judge you anymore, nor try to change you."

Sasuke looked at Neji some more now and then smiled slightly.

"... Thank you." He said. "I missed you too. I was worried."

"In the end there was no reason to." Neji said, smiling a little. "I'm alright now."

"Yeah but just because we got the chance to save you." Sasuke said. He stroke some of Neji's hair out of his face.

Neji nodded as he kept looking at Sasuke.

"I wonder why Orochimaru chose to kidnap me out of all people to get you..." He said.

"Because he knows that right now, I care about you the most." Sasuke said, speaking softer then normally.

Neji was silent as he looked at Sasuke, whose hand was still in his hair. He then softly grabbed Sasuke's hand with his own.

"...Kiss me Sasuke." He then said.

Sasuke really didn't need to hear that again, as he moved closer and put his lips on Neji's. For some reason, right now, they were more comfortable with each other, then they had been ever since they met.

Neji immediately leaned in and put a hand under Sasuke's chin, cupping it so he could kiss Sasuke deeper. As his eyes fluttered closed and he sighed in comfort, he realised the same as Sasuke had just done. They blended together perfectly right now. Probably because Orochimaru out of all people had confirmed that there was more between the two dark haired boys then just friendship, and because of Neji's statement of not wanting to judge Sasuke anymore. They accepted each other.

Sasuke started prying open Neji's mouth with his tongue and made the kiss even deeper. He softly grabbed Neji's head and let his thumbs stroke Neji's cheeks.

Neji let out a slight moan as he let go of Sasuke's chin and grabbed a fistful of Sasuke's hair. He then obeyed Sasuke by opening his mouth and allowing the other's tongue in. This was not their first kiss, but for Neji it felt like it was. This was the first kiss they shared out of appreciation for each other, and wanting to be as close to each other as possible.

They kissed like that for a long time, in which Sasuke just couldn't pry away from Neji. At some point though, he had to pull away for some air. Sasuke kept his eyes closed and kept holding onto Neji's head.

Neji was silent as he breathed onto Sasuke's lips for some time, before leaning back in and kissing Sasuke again. He couldn't let go of Sasuke right now. He wanted to be close to him. Really close.

Sasuke let out a soft moan as he felt Neji's lips on his again and kissed back immediately. He inched even closer, this time entangling his fingers in Neji's hair. He could feel his own heartbeat speeding up.

Neji let his tongue move around Sasuke's, taking in Sasuke's taste and loving every second of it. He brought Sasuke close to him. Words were not needed for what they were doing. They both knew.

To get even closer to Neji, Sasuke sat down on the bed. He was leaning over Neji now. He could stay there forever if it was up to him.

As they kissed longer, they got more and more lack of air. It was Neji this time who broke the kiss, and then just brought Sasuke close to his chest, holding him close.

Sasuke softly wrapped his arms around Neji, letting his head rest in Neji's neck and sighed. It was hard to believe they could be this comfortable after all that had happened before.

Neji let out a chuckle now.

"Seems like there are some feelings I didn't know I had for you." He said.

Sasuke laughed a little now.

"Guess so." He said. "Are you willing to try now?"

"I am." Neji said, nodding, as he looked at Sasuke. "Are you?"

"Of course I am." Sasuke said, and smiled slightly. "My brother told me I needed someone calm."

Neji then smiled broadly.

"He knows you very well." He then said.

Sasuke looked at Neji now, who was smiling like that for the first time.

"... You should smile more often." He said, mesmerized by how good this made Neji look. Even better then he usually looked.

"I'll smile more often when you're with me." Neji said, as his smile dropped just slightly, but now mixed with a soft look in his eyes. "I only smile when I truly feel happy."

Sasuke was the one smiling now.

"Then I'm glad you just did." He said and put his fingers through Neji's hair.

Neji now gave Sasuke a teasing look.

"Wait until you hear me laugh." He then said.

Sasuke laughed slightly.

"When do you do that then?" He asked. "I want to know what I need to do to make that happen."

"That would ruin the fun, wouldn't it?" Neji asked. He gave Sasuke a slight smirk before pulling him close to his chest again.

Sasuke let out another laugh and pulled Neji closer.

"I'll just have to find out then." He said.

"I guess so." Neji said. "I'm curious to meet your brother. Do you want to tell more about him?"

"Sure." Sasuke said. "His name is Itachi and he looks a lot like me. On the outside that is though. I guess he's a lot smarter and a 'lot' calmer then I am."

"Is he as calm as I normally are?" Neji asked. "And don't say things like that.. you don't know how smart he is yet, right?"

"He sounds a lot wiser then I do." Sasuke said. "And I think he might be even calmer. Believe me, if you met his boyfriends, you will see how much calmness and patience he must have."

Neji chuckled a little at hearing this.

"What are 'they' like then?" He asked.

"One of them is very tall and big and looks somewhat like a shark. And I swear, he's always horny." Sasuke said. "The other one is far too loud and puts 'un' after every sentence and he's always whining about something. I can't imagine anyone who can cope with that."

"So is your brother the seme or the uke?" Neji asked, already admiring this guy. He would get crazy if he would have to be in a relationship with people like that.

"... I don't know. Maybe both? God I don't even wanna think about that." Sasuke said, putting up a disgusted face.

Neji chuckled at seeing the expression on Sasuke's face, and then shook his head.

"Ukes are mostly whining, big guys that look horny all day long must be semes." He then said. "Perhaps your brother adapts to both indeed."

"Yeah... so he's both. Maybe they even do threesomes... God why did I say that?" Sasuke said. "You know I caught them all naked in bed together once. Thank god they were sleeping."

Neji laughed now.

"You're like a little kid who doesn't want to know his parents ever had sex." He then said. "The thought of a threesome is not that bad, right?"

Sasuke looked at Neji a little startled now.

"...You're laughing." He said. "And you don't want to have a threesome right?"

Neji snorted.

"Scary, right?" He asked. "A threesome is something to try once. I have no idea how it would be. Wouldn't you want it?"

"No. Because that would mean someone would either be fucking me, or someone else would be having sex with you." Sasuke said. "And I don't want either of those options to happen."

"So you think I could only be an uke then?" Neji asked, as he sat up, a little more interested than before.

"Well.. yeah." Sasuke answered nodding. "You don't really seem like a seme to me."

"Why not?"

"Because you don't seem like you would take control." Sasuke said shrugging.

Neji snorted a little upon hearing this.

"Forgot that my best ability is to take over someone's body?" He asked. "You have seen nothing of me taking control. We only had sex once, and there you took my virginity, so I focussed only on the feelings."

"Yeah well still." Sasuke said. "Besides, you strike me as a person who likes it too much to be pleasured back there to give it up for some control." He smirked a little.

"I think 'you' strike me as a person who likes the thought of putting your cock back there, so don't make excuses." Neji said, once more letting out a chuckle.

"Well that too." Sasuke said, laughing. "But I still don't think you would be seme."

Neji shrugged.

"Just kissing someone is fine with me already as well." He then said. "And touching."

"But I still don't want to have a threesome, because you see, you kissing someone other than me is really not a turn on." Sasuke said.

Neji laughed a little once more.

"I can understand that." He said.

"And the thought of my brother having a threesome with dumb and horny is making the thought of threesomes even worse." Sasuke said grinning.

"I can imagine." Neji agreed, still laughing.

Sasuke laughed too and then gave Neji a kiss.

"You think you can come downstairs with me so you can eat something?" He asked.

"That would be great." Neji said, nodding . "But you have to help me if we need to go down some stairs."

"We do, but I'll help. I want you to meet Itachi and I want you to eat. I'm sure they either didn't give you anything or they gave you crappy stuff." Sasuke said as he started helping Neji out of bed.

"They didn't give me anything no, except for water, thank god." Neji said, while putting his legs on the ground.

Sasuke slowly pulled Neji up and held him up as well.

"I'm sure Karin will prepare a feast when you get down." He said.

Neji chuckled as he shrugged on a robe that was put over the end of his bed.

"Did they miss me?"

"I think they did. They were really worried." Sasuke said.

"Good to hear." Neji said. "Seems like we found ourselves some good friends Sasuke."

"I guess so." Sasuke said nodding. "Now let's get downstairs, cause I'm starving too." He helped Neji walk out of the bedroom. It was really funny how they had left each other after an argument, and now they were in a relationship. Sasuke couldn't complain though. Neji was really everything he could have hoped for.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

* * *

><p>When they both came down, Neji was immediately jumped on by an overly excited Kiba and Suigetsu, screaming how happy they were he was ok and how worried they had been. While chuckling he shrugged them off, to meet Sasuke's brother and said guy's boyfriends. Like Sasuke had said, Sasuke's brother, his older brother, obviously, was very calm and seemed like he had every muscle in his whole body in control. The guy looked really serious and wise. Exactly the opposite of the hyperactive blonde who complimented him on his 'beautiful hair' which was, according to the crazy Deidara, 'a piece of art'. The guy told him that he was an artist (and the huge man in the background abruptly started laughing at hearing this) and that he started to live with Itachi about a year ago. The huge man, Kisame, was just like Sasuke had told him as well, but Neji thought that no matter how evil and mean the man looked, he probably was like a big dog from the inside. Sweet and caring. Neji immediately had respect for those three, and he was even happier that Sasuke had met them as well. Especially Itachi. Sasuke could probably find a lot of himself back because of his brother, and Sasuke seemed to listen to him and look up to him as well. It would do Sasuke good.<p>

"So, Neji right? Are you telling me that your hair is it's natural colour un?" Deidara asked curious, as everyone had sat down at the giant dinner table of the house they were staying in. Sasuke shook his head at this and looked at his brother, almost about to ask him how in heavens name he put up with that guy.

Itachi just shrugged, as he shook his head as well.

"...I wouldn't even know how to give it another colour, so yes." Neji answered, bringing one eyebrow up as he looked at the blonde. What was up with him and his hair?

"There are lots of ways to colour your hair." Deidara said. "I can't believe no one coloured yours un. Just like I couldn't believe that with Kisame. I mean, whose hair is blue?"

"I already told you why I look how I look." Kisame said. "It's practically the same story as Kiba told us about him and his wolf side. My hair colour is natural."

"...You also have animal blood?" Kiba asked, astonished. Kisame simply nodded.

"Shark blood."

"Yeah well it's still odd that that gives you blue hair un. I mean, sharks don't even have hair so." Deidara said.

"I really don't get how anyone can have animal blood though. I mean, what happened, did some human produce offspring with an animal?" Sasuke asked frowning.

"My ancestors changed into animals, and one of them kept on changing into a wolf." Kiba explained. "He did this so often that in the end, he couldn't leave his wolf form anymore. He ended up impregnating a female wolf and that's how the Inuzuka clan started: a mix between wolves and mankind."

"That's just weird. So Kisame, can you change into a shark as well?" Sasuke asked.

"Yes." Kisame answered, nodding. "I can transform into a shark as much as I want to."

Deidara looked disgusted now and nodded.

"He can also 'partially' change into a shark. And then he's even scarier than normal un." He said.

Kisame sighed now, a little annoyed.

"Shut up Deidara." He said.

"Shush, the two of you." Itachi said. "It's just a talent Kisame has, and apparently, Kiba does as well. As to go back to the point of the conversation, this is Kisame's real hair colour, the same goes to his skin."

"And as for me, that's the same." Neji commented.

"Well I'm sorry for asking un." Deidara said offended and crossed his arms.

"Are you always offended this quickly?" Neji asked Deidara.

"Yes I am. Got a problem with it un?" Deidara snapped. Sasuke had already had the pleasure of knowing not to ask Deidara those kind of questions. At some point, Deidara decided he needed a glass of cold water poured on him for doing just that. He hoped Neji would just decide to shut up.

"Perhaps I might in the future, but for now I was just wondering." Neji said, shrugging.

Deidara hissed something now, making it unhearable because those words were not to be said out loud. He then left to the kitchen to yell at Karin to hurry up with the food.

"Has he always been like this or is something making him jumpier then normally?" Sasuke asked Itachi.

"He's always had a temper, but lately he has been a little more... explosive then normally." Itachi answered, frowning in thought.

"Oh I know what it is." Kisame growled. "He's jealous of what you and I have. He can't stand it."

"Well I can understand 'that'." Sasuke said. "Maybe you should talk to him. He's making Karin's life a living hell now that he decided she is going to be the one he yells at when he's mad."

"I'll go to him." Itachi said and abruptly stood and walked to the kitchen. He saw Deidara fuming against Karin, who was looking horribly offended, and then turned his lover around.

"Deidara." He then said. "What's going on?"

Deidara angrily pushed Itachi's hands away from him.

"Just let me be angry will you un." He snapped.

"If you would just do that without making others angry as well, then it would be ok." Itachi said. "Leave Karin alone Dei."

"I wouldn't need to be angry if you just... well whatever un." He snapped, crossing his arms and giving Karin a glare when she dared to look at him.

"If I what?" Itachi asked, raising an eyebrow. He sighed when Deidara sent him a foul look as well. "I think we need to talk."

"Oh do you now?" Deidara asked. "That would be a nice change in our relationship un."

"Don't be like that now, you know as well as I do that I'm talking a lot to you." Itachi said. "The only reason why I talk to Kisame more is because he comes to talk a lot more then you."

"You never talk to me like you do to him un." Deidara said and then turned to Karin. "Would you piss off?"

"I'm cooking here, piss off yourself and go to your god damn room for your little chats!" Karin snapped to Deidara. Itachi now grabbed Deidara by the hand and dragged him upstairs. He took him into their bedroom and then closed the door behind him.

"What on earth is your problem Deidara?" He then asked, frowning.

"I'm sure you can guess it." Deidara snapped and turned away from Itachi.

"You probably think you don't get enough attention." Itachi said, frowning even deeper.

"Yeah I only 'think' that right?" Deidara hissed. "I mean, why would anything I think matter un."

"If nothing you think mattered, then we wouldn't be in a relationship." Itachi said, sighing. He then sat down onto the bed. "Trust me Deidara, I'm giving you all the attention I can. But when Kisame is already there, it's hard to say no to him. You know that he doesn't take no for granted. It has no use."

"No it's because you like him better than me un." Deidara snapped. He watched as Itachi sat down on the bed.

Itachi gave Deidara a stern look.

"That's not true." He said. "If I cared about one of you more than the other, I would let one of you go."

"Then why do you always side with Kisame, always pick him first and always end up in bed with him un?" Deidara snapped.

"The first two things aren't true, and the last thing is because he pushes me in." Itachi answered.

"You do side with him, you just don't notice you do un." Deidara snapped. "And you could say no to him. Right now I'm the only one who has to sacrifice things for you to be with both of us un."

"I think I have more reason to be angry with you then you with me Deidara." Itachi shortly said. "You hate someone I love, and you're not even hiding it."

"Sure put it all on me un." Deidara snapped and looked away, trying to hide that what Itachi just said hurt him.

"It's you who's making this into such a big problem." Itachi said. "You never come to me to talk, I'm the one who's making the contact between us. And yes, that's difficult when Kisame is always there. Kisame loves me and he doesn't mind you being here as well, because he knows I love you. And he loves everything I love. I think it's about time you drop your hate, or you drop all of this. I can't stand it anymore that the two of you are always bickering because you snapped at him for just being there."

".. Fine.. I'm wrong then un." Deidara said, trying to snap. "It's abnormal to be jealous. You don't even realise that this isn't normal."

"I do realise it." Itachi said. "But you're forgetting that me and Kisame have been together for some time already, before allowing 'you' in 'our' relationship."

"Yeah because 'I' wanted it so badly right?" Deidara snapped now. "If you didn't want me in 'your' relationship, than you should have just rejected me back then."

"You should know by now that I only let people in when I care a lot about them." Itachi said. "I love you Deidara, but I love Kisame as well. If you can't cope with that, then you're going to have to leave me, because I can't let go of any of you. I refuse to break up with Kisame, and I refuse to break up with you."

Deidara glared at Itachi now and then walked to the closet, pulling out a suitcase. He didn't want this anymore. He didn't want to be the one to get blamed or the one who joined in someone else's relationship. And he didn't want to be set aside anymore. No matter how much he loved Itachi.

"Deidara... what do you want me to do, except for leaving Kisame?" Itachi asked.

Deidara didn't answer for a while as he opened the suitcase and already dumped some of his clothes in them.

"You know I can't answer that question un." He said, his voice hoarse from trying to hold back tears.

Itachi stared at the ground for some time, before getting up and suddenly grabbing Deidara, slamming him up against the wall.

"Don't you dare to leave." He then snapped, giving his blonde lover a glare.

Deidara swallowed as he looked at Itachi with wet eyes.

".. I don't know what else to do anymore un.." He softly said.

Itachi looked at Deidara for some time with a frown on his face, before suddenly grabbing Deidara's chin and bringing him closer. He sealed Deidara's lips with his own, giving Deidara a possessive kiss, showing Deidara he was Itachi's and not supposed to leave him.

Deidara moaned slightly as Itachi did this. He couldn't help but give in and grabbed Itachi's shirt slightly. It sucked that Itachi could always convince him to stay, because in the end, Deidara knew he would break down at some point.

Itachi kissed Deidara roughly for some time, before letting go of Deidara's chin and resting his forehead against Deidara's, while stroking over his lover's chest.

"...I don't want to stop you if you want to go... I won't force you to stay." Itachi said, sighing.

Deidara was silent now, glad that Itachi's forehead was on his, so Itachi couldn't see that he was crying.

"...I do want you to know that I really love both of you equally." Itachi said.

"..It doesn't feel like that un.." Deidara whispered. He knew that by talking, he had betrayed his crying to Itachi. That stupid bastard never missed anything.

"I know." Itachi said. "You want me for your own." He brought up his hand and stroke away some of Deidara's tears, while removing his forehead from Deidara's. He could still not stand it to see Deidara cry.

Deidara looked at Itachi and then he really started crying.

"I-I'm sorry un... I thought I could do it.." He said.

Itachi bit his lip and then brought Deidara closer, letting him cry on his shoulder.

"If that feels best for you Deidara..." He then said.

Deidara grabbed Itachi tightly as he cried.

".. I don't wanna go.. b-but I just.. I don't know what to do un.." He said.

"Perhaps you should sleep somewhere else for some time, so you can think of what you want to do." Itachi said, shushing Deidara. "It's not like you'll be able to think about what you want better when Kisame is here the whole time."

".. You'll stop loving me if I do that un.." Deidara said and took deep breaths.

Itachi chuckled a little.

"Trust me, there is more needed for that." He said.

".. But if I leave Kisame and you will get an even better relationship and ours will be.. will be left behind even more un.." Deidara said.

"Me and Kisame have been together already when you came, so that says nothing." Itachi said, as he shook his head. "If you think our relationship will become better because you leave, then it's not really true that we never speak or talk."

"Well Kisame would be happier if I was gone un." Deidara said, shrugging slightly. "I don't wanna leave, but we're really not working right now with Kisame there..."

"Kisame would be happy that you're gone because you don't accept him." Itachi said, frowning slightly. "I don't want to be mean Deidara, but it's you who's making it more complicated and not Kisame. The only thing he is doing now is nagging you to get you back for the hate you're sending him."

Deidara now immediately pushed Itachi away and looked down. This was exactly how Itachi always reacted. It was all his stupid fault and neither Kisame nor him were the ones in the wrong.

Itachi sighed as he shook his head.

"Deidara please.. do you want me to lie to you the next time?" He asked.

"I don't want you to do or say anything anymore." Deidara said. His hands were slightly shaking now. "Of course you had to say 'that' out of all things un."

Itachi narrowed his eyes slightly now.

"If you expect me to let Kisame take the blame who did nothing but react naturally, then you know where to find the door." He said. With that, he turned around and left the room.

Deidara watched Itachi leave and then silently started packing. If Itachi wouldn't even try his hardest to keep him here, then he knew it was time to leave. Once he had packed all of his stuff, which really wasn't that much, he sat down on the bed and started crying silently.

Itachi walked down the stairs and walked through the kitchen and living room, not saying a word. He then took his coat and left the house.

Sasuke frowned as he saw Itachi leaving and even more when he saw a crying Deidara coming down with a suitcase. Sasuke quickly got up and followed Itachi. He knew something was wrong now. Once he was outside, he spotted Itachi and ran up to him.

"What happened?" He asked.

"Nothing." Itachi shortly said, as he was heading for the forest. "Go back into the house."

"No, I know you're upset now." Sasuke said. "Just talk to me."

"Deidara is acting difficult again." Itachi said, as he kept walking. "He's acting dramatic and blaming Kisame for everything."

"Yeah but that's not new. I men, I saw Deidara with a suitcase." Sasuke said.

"The fact that I'm not agreeing with him that because of Kisame our relationship isn't going well makes him want to leave for real." Itachi said. "He can't cope with the three of us being together, he wants me for his own."

"So he's leaving?" Sasuke asked, frowning slightly. He could only imagine how that made Itachi feel right now. Even though Itachi wasn't showing anything but just a slight irritation.

"Yes he is." Itachi bit out.

"Aren't you going to stop him?" Sasuke asked carefully.

"He doesn't accept anything except for me breaking up with Kisame." Itachi snapped. "I'd rather die than do that."

"Don't snap at me." Sasuke said. "I get that you're upset, but maybe you should just try talking to him some more."

"You have no idea how many times we talked about this crap." Itachi said. "And if you don't want me to snap to you, go back to the house then, because I'm angry."

"Fine then you just have to snap at me." Sasuke said. "I just think that if you go back now you could stop him from leaving."

"I'm not sure if I want him like this in the house any longer." Itachi growled. "He's only snapping and whining, nothing else. I'm sick of it now. Perhaps it's best to be apart for some time."

"But you love him right?" Sasuke asked.

"Yes, I do." Itachi said. "But he only believes it when I leave Kisame."

"Well, I don't want to make you angrier, but you do tend to say the wrong things." Sasuke said.

"Do you want me to hit you?" Itachi snapped. "You have no idea how often we talked about this, but it just doesn't get through his head. The situation is clear, Deidara is jealous so he is mean to Kisame, he shies away from getting near me because Kisame is there as well, Kisame defends himself and snaps to Deidara as well and shows him he has power. That's it. 'Deidara' is the one making problems here, not Kisame. And nor am I."

"Well sorry." Sasuke said. "I'm not saying it's not his own fault, I'm just saying that the things you and Kisame say right now, aren't going to make him happier about the situation."

"What, me putting him on his place and Kisame taking revenge for Deidara snapping against him for just sitting in a room?" Itachi asked.

"You just both say things that could come across as thinking of him as a third wheel." Sasuke answered.

"Funny that you have judgements like that after just knowing us for not even a week." Itachi growled. "He takes everything personally, and sees everything as something offending. If Kisame would have been like him, he would have killed himself from the things Deidara said to him. Sometimes it's just plain cruel."

"I don't have judgements Itachi. You're right, I don't know the details of your relationship. What I do know is that you love him and you don't want him to go." Sasuke said. "It's ok to admit it hurts you know."

"Please don't press it in." Itachi muttered. "I need to be alone now Sasuke... Or at least have Kisame here. If you go back to the house, could you please ask Kisame to come to the edge of the forest?"

Sasuke looked at Itachi for a while, then looked to the ground.

".. Sure." He said and then turned around. He felt stupid for not being able to get Itachi to talk it through with him.

Itachi walked a little further and then sat down near a tree, his back to the house he had left just now, and thus to Sasuke.

Sasuke gave Itachi a brief look before walking back to the house. Once inside, he told Kisame to meet Itachi there and when he looked out of the window, he could see Kisame sitting down next to Itachi. And then giving him a hug. At least someone could help Itachi feel better.

* * *

><p>A few days later, Sasuke and Neji were laying on their bed, kissing. Sasuke had his hands in Neji's hair, but his kiss wasn't what it normally was. He had other things on his mind right now, but he was hoping Neji wasn't noticing. He didn't want Neji to think he wasn't enjoying their kiss.<p>

But Neji did notice something was off. So after trying for a few more times, he finally gave up and broke the kiss.

"What are you thinking of?" He asked.

Sasuke looked at Neji and then sighed. Damn, he'd been busted.

"It's Itachi... He just isn't happy anymore. I'm worried about him." Sasuke answered.

Neji moved himself up a little and looked at Sasuke.

"I noticed." He then said. "He's probably missing Deidara."

"Yeah but it's out of control. He doesn't talk to me, he doesn't laugh." Sasuke said. "I don't think I've ever seen him like this before."

"Does it also feel like he has never been like this before you lost your memory?" Neji asked.

"Yeah it does." Sasuke said. "I mean, with everything else he has done so far, I felt it was familiar. I'm sure he has never been like this before. He's miserable and I don't know how to cheer him up."

"I doubt if there is anything to cheer him up with." Neji said, as he sat up fully now, on the edge of the bed. "Poor Kisame is trying so hard, but it seems to have no use."

"I know. They should have never decided to be in a relationship with the three of them. Of course that wouldn't work out." Sasuke said. "And now Itachi's miserable because of it."

"Itachi obviously made a mistake by starting to like Deidara as well." Neji said, nodding. "Of course it's his own fault and he could have seen it coming. But it's still a sad situation. If Deidara and Kisame would have loved each other too then it would have been a lot easier."

"I know, it just sucks it's Itachi who has to suffer now." Sasuke said. "Itachi might really do something stupid if Deidara decides he never wants to come back."

"Do you think it would really be better if he came back then?" Neji asked, frowning slightly. "I think Itachi is just grieving for Deidara's loss now, so he can continue on later."

"He's not dead you know." Sasuke said. "And I do think it would be better if Deidara comes back. For both of them. If not even Kisame can cheer him up then it's obvious it will take forever for him to get over Deidara."

"Do you really think the problems will be solved when Deidara comes back?" Neji asked.

"I think it would make Itachi happier." Sasuke said. "And that's really all that matters now."

"I doubt it, I don't think that Deidara suddenly agrees with being with both Itachi as Kisame." Neji said, as he shook his head.

"Well that's up to them, but they need to at least talk because Itachi can't go on like this. Kisame told me he's already losing weight and he barely has anything too loose to begin with."

"..That's worrying indeed." Neji said, sighing. "And it has just been a few days for that matter."

"Right, he'll starve himself to death if it goes on longer." Sasuke said.

"The stupid thing is that he probably doesn't even notice it himself." Neji said.

"All he notices is that Deidara isn't there." Sasuke said. "Another reason that little asshole has to come back, I can't focus on kissing you."

Neji let out a snort.

"Don't worry, I'll bring your focus back in a second if I want it." He then said. "But perhaps it's best for now to focus on Itachi. He needs it a little more."

"Yeah I guess it is." Sasuke said nodding. He was trying his hardest to be there for Itachi. Sadly enough, right now the only one Itachi needed, was the one who had hurt him in the first place.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

* * *

><p>Kisame was furious. He had been looking everywhere in town for the raging blonde that had lived in their house. He did not intend to hurt the guy, just to drag the artist back at his hair to the house. He couldn't stand seeing Itachi this upset anymore. He knew Itachi loved Deidara as much as Kisame, but he hadn't expected the loss of Deidara to be this heavy. Kisame felt both relieved as even more angry when he entered a pub and saw Deidara sitting at the bar with a friend of him, Sasori. Kisame walked up to them and abruptly turned Deidara around in his chair.<p>

"You're coming back to the house right now, Deidara." He bit out to him, a look in his face that clearly showed that saying 'no' was not an option.

Deidara was startled for a while and just stared at Kisame. He wasn't ready to come back, but he knew that if he said anything like that, Kisame would use him as his personal punch ball. Maybe if he just stayed silent, Kisame would leave again. Sadly enough, he knew that was never going to happen though.

"Did you suddenly lose your tongue?" Kisame snapped to his boyfriend's other lover. "I want you to come back. And even if you want 'me' to leave so you can come back, fine. Itachi's missing you so badly, he's suffering and I can't take it anymore to see him like this."

Deidara frowned and then looked away.

"If you're gonna go instead of me, he'll only be even more miserable un." He said. It hurt him though, to hear that Itachi was suffering because of him.

"If that day comes, we will see each other outside the house." Kisame growled. "I have no problem with sharing Itachi with you, but 'you' have a problem with sharing him. So then the only solution on this problem is me leaving. Then you have the feeling that he's more with you then with me since you're living with him, and I'm only seeing him outdoors. And no, I don't like that, but I'd rather do that then have Itachi unhappy."

"That won't solve anything un." Deidara said. "You're not moving out."

"Do you have a better idea?" Kisame asked, crossing his arms while giving Deidara a stern look.

"It's obvious you're too jealous to share." He added.

"I'm not too jealous un. But we're not sharing. You're always around, I don't even get to have a second alone with Itachi. But whenever I tell you guys that I don't think it's fair, it's all just my fault anyway un. I didn't leave because he has you too, I left because you're both inconsiderate." Deidara answered. He didn't care if Kisame beat him up now.

"Am I inconsiderate for wanting to spend time with my lover?" Kisame asked, narrowing his eyes. "I admit that lately I haven't given you any chance of being alone with Itachi whenever I was home, just to get back at your nagging and snaps. The problem with Itachi is that he can't refuse any of us, that's why he never pushes me away to go to you. He'd rather be with the two of us at the same time then having to switch in between us."

"Well I can't do that. And I wouldn't have started 'nagging and snapping' if I didn't have the feeling he preferred you un.'" Deidara said.

"And I understand where that feeling came from." Kisame bit out. "Me and Itachi were in a relationship before you came. We have had our ups and downs already, and we had a huge bond already. Of course you felt left out. But it was still no reason to start acting like you did. You could have talked about it, instead of trying to claim Itachi in a way a fourteen year old girl would."

"We did talk about that, but all Itachi could say was that it was my own fault and that you two were oh so generous to have let me in un. I don't want to come back yet." Deidara said.

"Itachi doesn't eat anymore." Kisame now said, his tone dead serious.

Deidara was silent again now and refused to look at Kisame. He knew he was making Itachi's life miserable, but he couldn't go back and get blamed again. He almost wished he had never met Itachi in the first place, so this would have never happened.

"Look, I don't like to blame this stuff on you, because of course, I could also have been a different person and just have thought that you needed to get used to us and ignore your snaps and insults, and of course Itachi could just have shut up as well and let you fume about everything." Kisame said. "The only thing 'I' care about now is fixing this. Come back or leave for good. If you come back and leave later on, Itachi won't be able to take it. It wouldn't surprise me if he would kill himself after that."

Deidara was silent for a long time, until he grabbed his bag and turned to his friend, Sasori.

"I gotta go un." He said and almost ran out of the pub he was sitting in. All this talk made him want to go back to Itachi even more, but he first needed to talk. He needed to know what Itachi was thinking. And how things would be if he did come back.

* * *

><p>Once he reached the house, he opened the door, still having the key. Once he got in the living room, he bit his lip as he saw Itachi on the couch, reading something. He looked like he was miserable alright. He hadn't even bothered to put his hair in a ponytail, something he always did.<p>

".. Itachi un.." Deidara softly said.

Itachi looked up now and frowned deeply when he saw Deidara standing there. Without a word he dropped his book, rushed over to Deidara and hugged him close, almost suffocating him in his grip.

Deidara swallowed as he closed his eyes and hugged Itachi back, burying his head in the crook of Itachi's neck. He couldn't say anything, he had missed Itachi far too much. But they still needed to talk.

"..You've come to say goodbye for good, haven't you?" Itachi whispered, while lowering his head onto Deidara's.

".. No.. I want to come back Itachi un.. but we need to talk first." Deidara said, not wanting to let go of Itachi.

Itachi was the one who let go now tough, and looked at Deidara.

"...About what?" He asked, still afraid Deidara would leave for good.

"About us.. this un.." Deidara said. "About how I feel and the way you think about it." His hands were still holding on to Itachi's shirt.

"..Right." Itachi said, nodding. "Do you want to go to the forest to talk about it?"

Deidara nodded and turned around. He didn't feel like talking in the house. Too many people could walk in on their conversation.

Itachi followed Deidara out of the house, towards the end of the forest. They sat down in the shadow of a huge tree, where no one could see them. Itachi then looked at Deidara.

Deidara was silent for a while but then sighed and looked at Itachi.

"... How serious do you take me un?" He asked.

"In what way do you mean that?" Itachi asked, confused for a moment. He hadn't expected a question like that.

"Exactly how I say it. How serious do you take me un. Not us, not our relationship, just me and the things I say." Deidara said.

"As serious as I take anyone." Itachi replied. "Except for the moments of course that I don't 'need' to take you serious."

"I'm asking you, because I don't always feel like you do un." Deidara said.

"Then on what moments do you feel like I don't take you serious?" Itachi asked.

"When I tell you how I feel about being in this relationship un. Because you always reply with that it's my own fault it's not nice and I'm the one at fault and I should just get over it." Deidara answered.

"If I wouldn't take you serious I would laugh at you and wave it off." Itachi said. "It's how I think of it Deidara. I can't say anything else about the situation."

"So I'm just always overreacting right?" Deidara asked, feeling tears spring to his eyes again. He hated this.

"That's the conclusion 'you' pulled to." Itachi said. "I never said anything about you overreacting."

"That's what it means if you tell me I should just get over it un." Deidara said. "And stop talking to me like that. It's always 'you, you, you'. Nothing is ever your fault or Kisame's. It's always my fault un.."

Itachi now massaged his temples a little.

"It's a little hard to deny the truth when you're coming to me to talk about our 'horrible' relationship of the moment." He said, ignoring the knot of anger that was building up in his stomach.

Deidara was silent before he started crying.

"Fine, it's all my fault! If that is what I need to say then fine un!" He said. "It's all my fault, I made everything horrible and miserable." He sobbed as he buried his head in his arms.

"Deidara... can you 'please' stop with that self-pity and talk to me instead of doing that?" Itachi asked, a hint of irritation in his voice, as he clenched his fists.

"S-sure it's self-pity." Deidara said. "If you have anything useful to say, then say it un."

"Same goes for you, the only thing you're saying is that it's all your fault." Itachi said. "If you only want to cry you should have said so, I'm trying to talk to you. Just 'what' is your point right now? I don't get it."

"My point is that you are 'always' telling 'me' it's my own fault! But I wouldn't have been this unhappy if you would have just listened to me instead of telling me that I have to deal with it and force myself on you and that if I don't do those things, I don't have the right to feel left behind. The bitching didn't start with me, it started because you and Kisame are 'always' together and you don't seem to get that when I tell you that I don't like it, I ' it."

Itachi sighed.

"I guess that then this relationship won't work out." He then said. "I have no idea how I can handle the situation differently. The best option for all of us is probably ending this relationship right now. I don't recall not listening to you when you wanted to talk about something, except for when you started about Kisame again."

"Well those times are exactly the times you don't listen to me. How would you feel if you felt unloved and I replied with 'get over yourself' un?" Deidara said, turning away from Itachi.

"It's just rubbish what you're saying, you should get over yourself because you have no reason to feel unloved." Itachi said, deeply frowning now. "I love you as much as Kisame, do I have to scream it into your ear to make you realise it? I missed you so much the last days that I wasn't able to sleep nor take a bite of food. What do I have to do to make you realise I love you?"

"Maybe you should stop telling me that whatever I say is rubbish and that I have to get over myself. Maybe instead of that you should tell me what you just said un." Deidara answered, still turned away from Itachi.

"...I really don't get it how you can take all of that so badly Deidara." Itachi said, confusion written on his face. "Did you grow up in an area where people were only singing sweet words to each other?"

"I grew up in a place with no parents and no one to love me un." Deidara said. "So it would have been nice that instead of telling me to stop talking rubbish, you'd tell me you love me."

Itachi just stared at Deidara blankly now. He didn't get it. He didn't get it at all. Didn't he tell Deidara he loved him every day? At least three times? He never told Kisame he loved him and he told Deidara as many times as possible so he wouldn't forget it or something... what on earth was Deidara's problem? Itachi seriously started to wonder if his brain had left him.

"I know what you're thinking, you tell me you love me all the time. But not at the moment I need it the most un." Deidara said. "You never told me you loved me when I felt like you loved Kisame more. At least not without first rubbing it in that whatever I'm saying is bullshit."

"This may sound very stupid, but.. could you just ask me next time what you need?" Itachi asked, frowning. "Those things don't even come up into my head. I say that what you say is bullshit, because it's simply not how it is. It's really hard to understand you sometimes... you're complicated."

"I'm sorry un.." Deidara said. His back was still to Itachi. He felt himself calming down though now that Itachi was talking calmly again, without telling him that what he just said was rubbish as well.

"Don't apologize, it's not your fault I lack people skills." Itachi said.

Deidara now turned around, sitting down on his knees and put his arms around Itachi's neck, pulling him close.

"I'm sorry for leaving un.." He softly said.

"It doesn't matter Dei, at least you came back." Itachi said with a sigh, as he pulled Deidara onto his lap and held him close as well.

"But you're even skinnier then me now... I'm so sorry un." Deidara said, sighing as he sat down more comfortably.

Itachi chuckled a little.

"Don't worry about that, I'll gain weight soon." He said.

"I'm still sorry." Deidara said. "And I missed you. And I love you un."

"I missed you too and I love you." Itachi said, and took a slight hold of Deidara's cheeks. "Now was that clear enough?" He teased his boyfriend, smirking a little.

Deidara just smiled now, holding Itachi's neck.

"Just shut up and kiss me un." He said.

Itachi gave Deidara a smile back and then brought his lips onto Deidara's, kissing him deeply and passionately. He was immensely happy for Deidara coming back to him, and he showed this by kissing his lover as loving as he could. He didn't even have to put effort in it because his feelings were honest.

Deidara just wrapped his arms around Itachi again and kissed back with everything he had. He felt a lot better and he was sure Itachi and he would do better now.

When Itachi broke the kiss again he moved his own head up so he could look the artist directly into the eyes.

"I promise you I'm going to spend more time together with you and I'll talk to Kisame." He then said.

Deidara smiled thankfully as he looked back at Itachi. He remembered falling in love with those eyes instantly when they had met. And it felt like they could start over with it now.

"Thank you un. And we need to have sex, because it's been three weeks." Deidara stated, his normal characteristics coming back.

Itachi laughed now as he grabbed Deidara and lowered them both onto the ground.

"You don't even have to mention it baby." He said, and kissed Deidara a little more aggressively now, feeling his cock stir because of Deidara's suggestion.

Deidara smirked into the kiss and wrapped his legs around Itachi's waist. He kissed back roughly and pulled Itachi on top of him more and more. He could barely wait.

Itachi moved his hands over Deidara's hips and slowly let them stroke upwards, pulling Deidara's shirt upwards as well, until two pink nipples were to be seen. Itachi broke the kiss to nap at the sensitive pieces of flesh, turning them hard. He then licked over them sensually.

Deidara let out a moan as he threw his head back a little. His fingers intertwined with Itachi's hair as his upper body pressed forwards to feel more of that mouth and tongue. Itachi was so good at this, it was hard to remember why he had left.

Itachi moved his hands down while massaging the skin of Deidara's chest, leaving his shirt up, and then started stroking over Deidara's still covered groin, teasing it by rubbing in circles over it, stimulating it to the fullest.

"What do you want baby?" Itachi breathed against Deidara's skin, before licking upwards and unbuttoning Deidara's shirt with his free hand.

Deidara let out another loud moan, not just because of the pleasure he was experiencing, but also because Itachi called him 'baby'. He really only ever said it to him.

"I w-want you... and e-everything you have to offer un.." Deidara moaned.

Itachi hummed in response as he almost tore Deidara's shirt from his body and licked over his neck, before taking some of the flesh at the nape of Deidara's neck and sucking on it heavily, effectively making a love mark. He stimulated Deidara's erection a little more by rubbing it more roughly.

"..Ah! F-fuck Itachi.. I'm n-not supposed to come a-already un.." Deidara moaned as his hips moved forward and he bend his neck so Itachi could suck on his skin better. He slowly let his hands roam under Itachi's shirt, in an attempt to do something himself as well. It failed though when he felt another rub over his length.

Itachi smirked as he licked over Deidara's neck a little longer, before licking down sensually. He paused at Deidara's pants and sat up. He pulled off his own shirt and retrieved a hair tie from his pocket, to push back his hair and tie it up. A clear sign that Itachi was going to make work of it now. He immediately pulled down both Deidara's pants in a quick jerk and started massaging Deidara's pulsating erection.

Deidara moaned once again and looked at Itachi with lust filled eyes.

"S-shouldn't I do something too un?" Deidara panted and then closed his eyes in the hopes of pushing back an upcoming orgasm. Damn, Itachi really was far too good at this.

"Just relax, I have something to make up for." Itachi said as he leaned down and licked away the precum that was currently dripping from his lover's hard organ. "The only thing you can do for me is not hold back." He added, speaking in a breathy voice, while moving his hands over Deidara's legs. He moved them down while massaging them, and took the pants that were currently hanging halfway his ankles down and away.

Deidara just kept on moaning and panting as Itachi worked his organ. His hips kept on bucking forward and Itachi's last words almost threw him over the edge. He wanted this to last, but he knew he wouldn't hold out for even a minute longer.

Itachi smirked as he now took Deidara into his mouth, stimulating the sensitive flesh with his tongue and hollowing his cheeks to madden Deidara with the warmth and wetness this gave him.

"F-fuck Itachi!" Deidara screamed out as he shot forward and grabbed Itachi's head slightly, before trying to calm down and laying back down. Itachi might lack in people skills, but his sex skills were insane.

Itachi would have laughed if the situation wasn't this erotic and immensely arousing. He slowly moved his hands up and down as skilled fingers stimulated Deidara's balls, before they started to softly stroke over the piece of flesh between Deidara's sacks and his anus.

Deidara let out a whimper before he threw his head back and came hard into Itachi's mouth. He didn't want Itachi to stop rubbing that sweet spot though.

"..D-don't stop p-please un..." He moaned as he was coming.

Itachi swallowed every drop as his touch was getting more intense. He released Deidara's organ as his orgasm was over and suddenly turned him around gently. He moved up the well curved ass and started licking around Deidara's most sensitive area while his finger kept on pressing on the spot just beneath it.

Deidara's breath got stuck in his throat for a second and he moved his body back slightly. It didn't take long before he was hard again and moaning from Itachi's actions.

"..O-oh Itachi, I need m-more..." He whimpered as Itachi's finger pressed even harder on that oversensitive spot.

"Hmm.. what is it that you want Deidara?" Itachi asked with a smirk as he released the spot and used his hands to spread Deidara's perfect round cheeks to lick over his tight entrance. He pressed with his tongue against it lustfully.

"... Oh f-for G-god's sake just put something in there un... a-anything.." Deidara moaned. All this pleasure made him think even less straight then he normally did. He wasn't thinking at all anymore. He just wanted Itachi.

Itachi smirked as he suddenly pushed his tongue inside, lubricating Deidara's entrance this way. He massaged Deidara's ass firmly now, bringing both Deidara as him in the mood.

Deidara's eyes rolled back in his head for a second. He had expected fingers or a cock, but not a tongue for some reason. But he couldn't complain, it felt amazing. He pushed his ass back even more now.

Itachi moved his tongue around, being gifted with a strong tongue, he stretched his lover's entrance. He then took it out and licked over Deidara's now puckered entrance.

"I want you to beg for it Deidara." He then breathed.

Deidara just kept on moaning for a while, not wanting to give in. But he just had to.

".. A-ah please Itachi un.. p-please.." He breathed out and pushed his body back.

"What do you want Deidara?" Itachi asked as he cupped Deidara's ass cheeks with his hands and pushed his thumbs in, driving Deidara mad.

Deidara frowned heavily now, hoping it would make him focus and not make him cry out.

"P-please take me... P-put that cock of yours in m-my ass already un... P-please put it in.." Deidara moaned.

Itachi smirked once more.

"G-good boy." He said, and then he removed his fingers and shoved his cock inside. First he let Deidara get used to just the head, before he moved forwards and buried himself deep inside of Deidara's wet cavern.

Deidara let out a scream that turned into a whimper. Not having sex for three weeks made him a lot tighter. And sadly enough for him (and soon 'luckily') Itachi was big.

"D-don't move y-yet.." Deidara moaned.

"Tell me when you're r-ready." Itachi said, as he leaned over Deidara and kissed him in the neck. He was in total control of his body so it wasn't too hard to stop it from budging forwards.

Deidara adjusted for a while and then nodded, moving his own body back against Itachi's to tell him he could start moving again. He knew he was gonna have to prepare for a lot of pleasure. Itachi knew his body far too well.

Itachi took the sign well and started moving in and out of Deidara, moving slowly. He arched his back so he could thrust into a different angle, and with that, right onto Deidara's pleasure point.

Deidara cried out every time Itachi hit his prostate and he moved back when he needed the pace to get faster and harder.

"... M-more Itachi.. I w-want to feel more un.." He panted.

Itachi started rocking his hips on a fast pace now, effectively hitting Deidara's prostate on and on. He had his hands on Deidara's hips as he pulled Deidara back against him, his balls slapping against Deidara's ass every time he did so. Those actions had him moaning in pleasure like mad.

"D-don't stop Itachi un! D-deeper.." Deidara moaned, rolling his hips slightly to create even more friction.

Itachi pushed his head back as he moaned loudly and started to make deep and hard trusts. He then bowed his head forwards again and let one of his hands sneak under Deidara's body and he started jerking him off to let him enjoy this to the fullest.

Deidara whimpered and moaned as Itachi did this and was overwhelmed with pleasure. He could barely move but continued to roll his hips anyway. He tried talking, but only moans and pants came out. He was so close to his orgasm, that his anus already started tightening around Itachi's cock.

Itachi bit his lip as he started to let his organ slip out of Deidara, before pushing it in over and over again, and repeating the process. He felt himself coming closer as well, and Deidara tightening up like that showed him that he was right on time. He wanted his uke to come first though.

And it didn't take long before that happened. As Itachi thrusted hard against Deidara's prostate and squeezed his cock, Deidara spilled his seed on his chest and on the floor, screaming Itachi's name as he came.

Not even a second after Deidara screamed his name like that, Itachi came deep inside of Deidara as well, filling him up. He collapsed on top of Deidara, and gave him kisses in his neck while he enjoyed his orgasm.

Deidara was panting and moaning as he felt Itachi come inside of him. He always loved that feeling. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the kisses as well.

"I love you Deidara." Itachi whispered in Deidara's ear, as he moved himself out of Deidara.

"I l-love you too un.." Deidara softly said. ".. B-but I don't love this floor." He chuckled a little.

Itachi smiled as he sat up and helped Deidara to put on his clothes again. After he had dressed himself as well, he scooped Deidara up in his arms and started walking back to the house.

Deidara smiled as he wrapped his arms around Itachi's neck and leaned against him.

"I missed you treating me like this un." He said.

"I missed it too." Itachi said, smiling.

Deidara hummed as Itachi walked back to the house with him. He couldn't have imagined that talking to Itachi would make them end up like this. It was great.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: *blushes* Err.. ok. That probably was one of the hottest sex scenes we ever wrote with Itachi and Dei. More nice lemons coming up!**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

A week later, Sasuke walked outside late in the evening. It was dark and silent out and only a few lights were to be seen from the city. Sasuke felt the cold breeze on his skin, since he was only wearing some pyjama pants. But he didn't come outside for nature. He came outside to get Neji. And he spotted the brunette a little further in the garden. Sasuke walked up to him.

"Neji. Are you coming to bed?" He asked.

Neji looked up and gave his lover a slight smile.

"Sure, it's getting cold anyway." He said and stood, walking towards Sasuke and grabbing his hand in his own.

Sasuke intertwined their fingers as they walked back inside and to their bedroom.

"Were you enjoying nature again?" He asked.

"Yeah." Neji said, nodding as he walked with his lover. "It's very relaxing, not to mention how beautiful it is. I don't think there is something more beautiful then nature in the world."

"Except for me right." Sasuke said and grinned at Neji as they got into their bedroom.

Neji chuckled. "Yes, you're the only thing that's more beautiful then nature, you're right." He said. He walked towards the sink they had on their room and washed his face a little, and started to clean his teeth, so he didn't have to get out of bed anymore later. Once he would be snuggled up against Sasuke he never wanted to leave, so he had to take preparations.

Sasuke already crawled into bed. He had just taken a shower and brushed his teeth. He kept sitting up though, to watch Neji.

"Good. I think you're beautiful too." He said, still grinning a little. He did mean it though.

Neji just gave Sasuke a loving smile, before washing his mouth with water. He blew out most candles that were lighting the room, except for the ones lingering at their bed, and he pulled off the yukata he had been wearing today, to reveal he only wore some cotton underwear underneath. He walked towards Sasuke and climbed in bed next to him, after putting the yukata on a chair.

Sasuke smiled at Neji and laid down, then pulled Neji near him.

"You look so good." He said.

Neji gave Sasuke a small smirk.

"Were you checking me out just now?" He asked, as he laid against Sasuke's chest.

"Of course I was, what do you think." Sasuke said, laughing a little. "I have a hot boyfriend, I would be stupid not to check you out when you barely have any clothes on."

"Why do 'you' never strip in front of me." Neji said, chuckling, as he gave Sasuke a kiss in his neck.

"Because you can't see me naked all the time. I'm far too appealing, we'd be having sex all the time." Sasuke answered and laughed as he kissed Neji's head.

Neji snorted.

"Well you're the seme, you mostly decide when we have sex or not." He said, as he caressed Sasuke's legs. "But you're right. You're gorgeous and when I can see all of you I can't keep my hands off of you."

Sasuke chuckled now.

"You know I have some news." He then said, not wanting to wait to tell Neji any longer.

"What is that?" Neji asked, looking at Sasuke curious.

"I found out one of my other powers." Sasuke said, looking back at Neji. "I can make copies of myself."

Neji furrowed his brows in surprise now.

"Really?" He asked. "How can you do that?"

"Something with my cells, it's hard to explain. I think it's a combination with me being able to trap people in illusions. Such a copy is really more of an illusion in the real world." Sasuke said.

Neji nodded as he thought about it for some seconds.

"Well, I must say I like that a lot." Neji said, teasing Sasuke a little.

Sasuke frowned now.

"Hmm why?" He asked, slightly confused.

"The more of you I can get, the happier I am." Neji said, giving Sasuke a smile as he kissed his neck. "Perhaps it's a chance to try out that threesome we talked about before." He then whispered into Sasuke's ear.

Sasuke was silent for a while and then laughed slightly.

"You're so dirty." He said.

Neji smirked a little bit as he sat back and looked at Sasuke.

"Perhaps, I like the thought of being pleasured by a lot of Sasuke's." He then said. "But in all cases, it's a great power to have. To think you have even more powers then we already thought.. you must be really curious about the rest of it now."

Sasuke's smile disappeared now as he looked at Neji.

"Yeah I am. I'm curious about a lot more than just my powers." He said.

"I understand." Neji said, nodding. "So what do you want to do with it?"

"I'm not sure yet. I thought maybe I could let it rest now, but I obviously can't." Sasuke said. "Orochimaru's still an option."

"No Sasuke." Neji said, as he shook his head. "It's not an option..."

"It is an option and it will be unless I can get my memory back in another way." Sasuke said.

"You saw what he did to me Sasuke, he won't be soft on you either." Neji said, frowning deeply as he sat up a little more to give Sasuke a stern look. "I don't want you to be hurt."

"I'm not gonna get hurt." Sasuke said. "I'm still alive after four years of being there. If he wanted me dead or hurt, he would have done it by now."

"Hurt you don't know." Neji said, as he shook his head. "What if there is danger?"

"Then so be it. But at some point I'm gonna want to get my memory back even more and once that happens I'm going to him." Sasuke said.

Neji sighed now, as he grabbed Sasuke's hand.

"Please think of it really well..." He then said. "You have to promise me that."

Sasuke looked at Neji and then nodded.

"I promise. You have to promise me you won't follow me if I go though." He said.

"...I can't promise you that." Neji said. "..If you're not coming back, I will come."

"No. You have to promise me you won't come, because you 'will' get hurt." Sasuke said.

"I'd rather get hurt and see you then, then having to live without knowing if you're ok." Neji said, as he shook his head.

"You can't follow me. And you can't tell Itachi either." Sasuke said.

"...Sasuke..." Neji said as he gave Sasuke a slightly worried look.

"No I'm serious. When I go to Orochimaru, you can't follow me and you cannot tell Itachi." Sasuke said.

"Why not?" Neji asked.

"Because I don't want you to be in danger." Sasuke said. "I would rather kill myself then get you in a dangerous situation."

"But what if you stay gone for months?" Neji asked, frowning deeply. "And why can't I tell Itachi?"

"Because Itachi would come running after me and kill Orochimaru before I even get the chance to ask him anything." Sasuke said.

"I think that as soon as Itachi notices you are gone he will know where you are." Neji said, as he shook his head.

"Not if you will tell him something else." Sasuke said.

"You want me to lie to your own brother?" Neji asked, frowning. He suddenly got angry. "And what 'if' you go away? Do you expect me to live with your brother while waiting for you to ever come back to me?"

Sasuke sat up a little now, looking at Neji.

"Fine, if you need to set a time for me to come back, then a month. If I'm not back by then, you can send my brother." He said.

"You need a month to get your memory back?" Neji suddenly snapped, as he felt panic coming up inside of him. "What are you planning, sharing that creep's bed to get your information?"

"Would you calm down. I'm saying 'if' I'm not back in a month, you can send Itachi to come and get me. You said he could hurt me, maybe he would like to experiment on me some more and I won't be able to get out." Sasuke said. "And I'm sure he won't just spill everything within a day."

"I highly doubt that he would ever give you the information without being forced." Neji muttered, as he looked away.

"I'm sure he will tell me at some point." Sasuke said, now pushing Neji away a little.

Neji now send Sasuke a death glare, and suddenly hit him hard on the shoulder.

"Stop with that behaviour." He hissed.

"What behaviour?" Sasuke snapped back, not liking that Neji hit him like that.

"Shoving me while we are having a conversation." Neji snapped. "Act normal and keep your hands with you. We're sitting in bed for god's sake."

"I was not shoving you and please don't be so dramatic." Sasuke said, laying back again. "You should be glad I told you in the first place."

"Yeah, I feel honoured that you tell your boyfriend about this." Neji said, looking away.

"Well you know what then, forget about it. If I'm gone at some point though, you'd better not come running after me, because I swear I will kill you myself then." Sasuke snapped.

Neji didn't react, he just closed his eyes. He was so annoyed with Sasuke at this moment, but even more annoyed by himself. He shouldn't care so much that Sasuke was about to go to someone as dangerous as Orochimaru. But he did. He loved the damn boy. And he hated that he did.

"And I wasn't even saying that I was going anywhere for sure. All I said was that I might leave some day, if I get sick of not having memories." Sasuke snapped. "I don't want to leave you at all, but I'm just telling you, that at some time, I will have to choose for myself."

"The problem is that you're already getting sick of not having memories." Neji hissed, as he crossed his arms. He leaned back against the pillows, feeling a grumpy mood coming up.

"Yeah but I'm still hoping that either somehow I will get used to it, or that I will get back my memory anyway." Sasuke said.

Neji shut his mouth as he laid down under the covers.

"Let's go to sleep." He said, not wanting to talk about this anymore.

Sasuke turned his head to look at Neji and then sighed.

"I'm sorry, but I just thought you should know ahead of time." He said.

"I don't want you to leave." Neji muttered, not looking at his lover.

"I don't want to leave you either." Sasuke said.

Neji rolled over with a sigh now and laid down onto Sasuke's chest.

"Then don't leave me, damn it." He said, giving Sasuke a look.

"You know I can't promise you that." Sasuke said and quickly put an arm around Neji, wanting to prevent him from rolling away again.

"...I know." Neji said, looking away once more.

".. I want you to know that if I leave some day, it won't be because of you." Sasuke said.

"Good." Neji said with a slight smile, as he leaned down and gave Sasuke a kiss on the mouth. "Sorry. The thought of you leaving is scaring me."

"I know. I'm sorry." Sasuke said and moved his hand through Neji's hair gently.

Neji sighed a little now.

"The whole situation just sucks." He then said.

"Yeah, well let's forget about that for a while. I don't wanna waste any time I have with you thinking about stupid situations." Sasuke said.

Neji now let a smile come up to his face.

"Good." He said, and leaned down to give Sasuke another kiss.

Sasuke grabbed Neji's head before he could kiss him though and then made sure their kiss was longer than just a peck. He really needed Neji for some reason.

Neji let out a slight moan as he felt how deep the kiss became, and kissed along with pleasure. He stroke over Sasuke's cheeks with his hand while his eyes fluttered closed.

Sasuke pulled Neji closer a little more and kissed him passionately, before breaking the kiss as well. He looked Neji in the eyes and then spoke.

"... I love you."

Neji stared at Sasuke for some time, as he felt immensely relieved that Sasuke had just said that.

"...I love you too." He then said, leaning down to capture Sasuke's lips one more time.

Sasuke deepened the kiss once again. He was on top of the world now that they had said those words to each other. Sasuke couldn't have imagined he would find love after losing his memory.

The day after, everyone was doing their own things in and around the house. Itachi was sitting on the couch together with Kisame and Deidara, talking to Sasuke, Neji was sitting on Sasuke's lap and Kiba was putting something broken together with Suigetsu. Everyone was enjoying the peaceful air around them, until someone knocked on the door. Itachi got up to get it, wondering who could possibly be at his door now. When he walked into the hallway and opened the door, he got a pleasant surprise when he saw a familiar face in front of him.

"Uncle Kakashi." Itachi said, giving Kakashi a slight smile. "For some reason, your timing is always bad, but this time you couldn't have been more on time."

"Hello Itachi." Kakashi said, smiling back (although you could barely see it since his mask was on his face). "Since when do I have bad timing? How have you been?"

"I've been well, Deidara, Kisame and me solved the problems in the house, but I have even better news for you." Itachi answered, nodding to Kakashi. "Sasuke is back."

Kakashi's smile disappeared now as he looked surprised.

"Really? Is he ok?" He asked. He obviously hadn't expected Sasuke to come back. At least not already.

"He is, but he lost his memory." Itachi said. He then sighed. "He was with Orochimaru."

Kakashi frowned now.

"Orochimaru? How did he loose his memory then? What did Orochimaru do?" He asked.

"We're not sure, but I fear that Orochimaru put experiments on him." Itachi said, looking slightly worried. "Sasuke is doing ok now, but he is dying to know his past."

"Well of course. He's not planning on going back to Orochimaru though, is he? Knowing Sasuke, he probably is." Kakashi said. "Can I see him?"

"Of course you can see him." Itachi said, nodding. "And yes, that's my fear as well. He's in the living room now, I'll bring you to him. Surprisingly enough, he found love for the first time in his life."

"Really? That's a nice twist." Kakashi said as they walked inside and then into the living room. Everyone looked up to see who the guest was.

"Kakashi un." Deidara said. "How have you been?" Sasuke frowned a little. Once again he felt the familiar feeling of knowing the man.

Kisame greeted Kakashi as well, and Kakashi gave them all a nod.

"Hey guys." He said, nodding towards Itachi's lovers. "I've been doing well. But before we start chatting like we always do, I first want to have a word with Sasuke. Are you coming?" He looked at the youngest in the room now, giving him a nod.

Sasuke looked a little confused now and then got up, pushing Neji of his lap gently.

"Who are you?" He asked as he walked to the man. He didn't seem dangerous.

"Kakashi." The man said, as they walked out of the room and outside. "Let's say that I'm your foster parent."

"My foster parent?" Sasuke asked. "I didn't know I had one."

"Of course you didn't know, you lost your memory, right?" Kakashi asked, as he looked at Sasuke. He then smiled. "I'm glad you're back. I looked everywhere for you."

"..You did? Why?" Sasuke asked. He looked at Kakashi, hoping it would trigger something. Any memory would be welcome, but he got none.

"You're like my son Sasuke." Kakashi said. "I love both you and Itachi equally, but you always needed me more than Itachi did. So we have a bond that was bigger then you had with your parents."

Sasuke stared at Kakashi now, and then looked away. Dammit. Another person he was supposed to have a bond with and he couldn't remember any of it. No matter how much he wanted his memory back, nothing he tried worked and all he could do was listen to people who he was supposed to like or even love.

"I must say I'm very proud of you." Kakashi said. "You had problems with opening yourself up to other people and you were afraid that you would never find someone to share your life with. You never said it openly to me, but I could see what you were thinking. And now you found yourself a nice boyfriend. I'm really proud. This will sound weird Sasuke, but perhaps it was for the best that you lost your memory. All the struggles that you were dealing with led you to the evil side. And perhaps it would have gotten even further if you hadn't lost your memory. You don't carry the traumas from the past with you anymore and you can look forward with a smile on your face."

"No I can't." Sasuke snapped. "Losing my memory was the worst thing that could have happened. I don't know who I used to be, but I forgot about 'everything'. Even you and Itachi and my parents. The 'only' good thing that came out of this was Neji. The rest just sucks."

"I understand that it must be frustrating for you, but you did change back into you used to be before you lost your mind." Kakashi said.

Sasuke frowned now.

"What do you mean 'lost my mind'?" He asked.

"In the end you were so obsessed with obtaining power that you pushed away everyone around you and trained day and night to get stronger." Kakashi said. "I think that's why you went to Orochimaru, you couldn't think straight anymore and Orochimaru offered you power. You hurt everyone around you because you thought they were only holding you off of your training."

Sasuke was silent now as he stared at the floor. He wondered why Itachi never told him about this. And he wondered why he wanted to get stronger so badly in the first place. All Itachi said was that their father wanted them stronger, but it would have been stupid to shove everyone away just because of that.

"Why did I want to get stronger so badly then?" He asked.

"You went to a school with a lot of students who possessed powers." Kakashi answered. "The school has four years in total, but excellent students finish school earlier then most students. Exceptional cases finish in two years. I take it that Itachi already told you that you were jealous of him and that your father could only praise your brother. Let me tell you this Sasuke. Itachi finished this school within one year. The pressure of your father on you and the expectations were insane."

"Yeah he told me about the jealousy.." Sasuke said. "And I can't remember that, so I don't know what to think of it."

"It was not because of you, it was because of your father." Kakashi said, as he shook his head. "He made you into someone jealous, because you saw your brother getting praised, and you were ignored. Your mom and Itachi gave you all the love you needed and I did the same, but you were always longing for your father's love and appreciation. And that's why you made it into your goal to pass Itachi."

"So I can figure out I never even got close. Itachi told me all I was exceptional in was talking to cats." Sasuke said, rolling his eyes at the thought. It sounded so stupid.

"Let's get something straight, you're an excellent fighter." Kakashi said. "But compared to Itachi, you have no talent at all. I have no talent at all. Even Orochimaru has no talent at all. Your brother is an exception, and you are very good. It's true, you could talk for hours to cats, you understood them completely and you even learned from them. Did you ever notice how flexible you are and how quickly your responses are to attacks? It's all because of the time you spend with cats."

"I didn't notice, because so far, I haven't fought anyone or anything." Sasuke said. "The only thing I noticed was voices when there was no one on the streets. Apparently those are cats."

"Yes, and there is also a possibility that you can see like the best in the dark and you can easily sneak up on people or animals." Kakashi said, nodding. "Your mother always told me that your bond with cats would help you with getting stronger and most importantly: you would always survive."

"I forgot about whatever I might have learned from cats." Sasuke said bitter. "So no surviving on that anymore."

Kakashi shook his head.

"This is a part of you." He then said. "It will come back when you need it."

"Maybe. But can you leave me alone now?" Sasuke asked. He hated not knowing any of this. Not knowing anyone else and especially not knowing himself. And going to Orochimaru was becoming more and more appealing.

"...As long as you promise me to not go to Orochimaru, I will." Kakashi said.

"Whatever." Sasuke said. He was not going to promise anything. He had some thinking to do and one of his solutions to all of this might not be what anyone else would want. But he needed his memory.

"Sasuke." Kakashi said sternly.

"Fine. I promise I won't go." Sasuke said. As long as he would promise, maybe no one would suspect he was gone to Orochimaru and they wouldn't come looking for him.

"Good." Kakashi said, as he nodded. "Then I will leave you alone for now." He ruffled through Sasuke's hair for a second, before turning around and walking back to the house.

Sasuke looked down bitterly. He had some decision making to do. And the chances were big that he would make one, nobody liked but him.

That evening, Sasuke came home from a long walk, finally having made his decision. But before he would do what he had to, he had to find Neji. Spend one more night with him, before he would leave. Yes, he would leave to Orochimaru. Not having any memories was driving him insane. He had to go. But not before being with Neji one last time. Once he spotted Neji in the living room alone, he quickly walked to him and pulled him up.

"Let's go to bed." He said.

Neji gave Sasuke a slightly worried look now.

"Where have you been?" He then asked.

"Just out, thinking." Sasuke answered. "Don't worry." He gave Neji a smile, hoping he was convincing.

Neji let out a slight sigh now and then nodded.

"I'll have to believe you on this one then." He said and gave Sasuke a slight kiss, before walking towards their room.

Sasuke walked with Neji and grabbed his hand, holding it tightly.

"Yes you do." He said, grinning a little. "We're not going to sleep right?"

"I'm not that tired no, we can just lay in bed a little." Neji said, nodding. They entered the room and Neji closed the door behind him, before letting go of Sasuke and started to pull off his clothes to get ready for bed.

"... I meant doing something else then just laying in bed." Sasuke stated, looking at Neji as if he was stupid.

Neji gave Sasuke a look now, as he stopped with pulling off his clothes.

"Like what?" He asked. The moment he had said it, he suddenly understood what Sasuke was talking about. He abruptly turned slightly red.

Sasuke laughed now.

"Jeez Neji, we did it before you know." He said and pulled off his shirt.

"Just once." Neji corrected Sasuke, slightly frowning while trying to work away the blush on his face.

"That still means we did it before." Sasuke said. "You're such a virgin, even though I took it away last time."

Neji gave Sasuke a slight glare now.

"Don't be silly, I can take you on." He then said, challenging Sasuke.

"Really? And what if I doubled myself then?" Sasuke asked smirking, already pulling off his pants.

Neji had to stop himself from gasping now. That look in Sasuke's eyes didn't mean much good.

"I..." he said, not being able to say something as he stared at Sasuke who was stripping in front of him.

Sasuke had no problem getting naked in front of Neji and then walked to him, undressing Neji as well.

"You look rather stupid like this you know." He said.

"Shut up." Neji said as he slightly pushed Sasuke away and pulled off his shirt, while walking backwards into the direction of the bed. The way Sasuke was showing him dominance was both exciting as humiliating. He knew Sasuke was the pro in this case, the dominant one and the boss, but it was still hard to accept. But he also knew that this would bring him the most pleasure and would give both of them a great time. So he started unbuttoning his pants, while looking at his gorgeous lover.

Sasuke grinned and then walked to Neji, sitting down close to him and pushing him down on the bed, kissing him passionately. If only he could give Neji a night to remember, he would be happy with that.

Neji let out a slight moan as he welcomed Sasuke's heat and kissed him back fiercely. The fact that Sasuke was nude already excited him greatly, to not even start about what was yet about to come. He was looking forward to this alright.

It didn't take long before Sasuke got rid of the remaining clothes Neji had on. And then the real fun began. Sasuke kissed Neji and let his hands roam over his upper body. Then a third hand was placed on Neji's chest.

Neji moaned as his eyes slipped open and he saw that two sets of hungry eyes were currently set onto him, Sasuke had copied himself during their kiss. He couldn't help but become immensely excited. He broke the kiss he was sharing with Sasuke, but then pulled the other's head close to give him a kiss instead. It was amazing. They were just the same person, even the taste was the same.

The Sasuke that was not kissing Neji currently moved down a little so he could start kissing and licking Neji's chest, toying with one of Neji's nipples. He let his hand move to Neji's cock and slowly started stroking it as his other self was kissing Neji heavily.

Because of his administrations Neji let out another moan, parting his legs a little while moving them up. As the strokes became rougher, he pushed his head back and broke the kiss, groaning in pleasure as he gripped the Sasuke that was currently close to him tightly.

It didn't take long before both Sasuke's were stroking Neji's cock and balls. They both took a nipple as well, sucking and licking it. One of them smirked. He would show Neji what he could do.

"..G-god Sasuke.. you're driving me insane.." Neji gasped, tossing his head back a little more.

"Good, that was the idea." One of the Sasuke's said. He moved his hand down even more, stroking Neji's entrance as the other one was still busy with Neji's cock and balls.

"G-god.." Neji hissed as he pushed his hips forwards a little, moving his head. He suddenly moved up a little and pushed both of the Sasuke's off of him and turned one of them around, pushing him down. He then kissed him roughly, while stroking over his body.

Both Sasuke's moaned as Neji did this and then one not participating started kissing Neji's neck and back as his fingers moved to Neji's ass and started stroking his entrance.

"Want to be a little more in control?" The one under Neji asked smirking as he broke the kiss.

Neji growled a little and just grabbed Sasuke's head again and kissed him once more, fighting for dominance. He knew he couldn't win this fight though. He was completely aware of the fact that he was currently in between two Sasuke's, and one already had his fingers on his entrance. He quickly moved his own hand down and started stroking the cock of the guy he was laying on right now. Instinctively reaching backwards with his free hand, he took a hold of the other cock as well. He slightly smirked into the kiss now.

They both moaned again, but instead of letting Neji do what they want, they pulled Neji up and pushed him back down on the bed, both holding one hand to pin him down, their other hands to work Neji's body, and especially his erection and entrance.

"..T-that's unfair.." Neji groaned in between his moans. He immediately closed his legs, catching one of the hands in between them. He struggled to get loose but of course it was useless.

"Nothing's unfair." Both Sasuke's said and smirked down at Neji as they just worked open his legs again and continued with what they were doing.

"So how did you wanna do this?" One of them asked.

"...I d-don't care." Neji gasped as he was fully hard now and the pleasure was driving him insane. "..B-but I guess I can please b-both.. haah... hng... o-of you..." He was blushing like mad right now, his legs being spread so widely now that it almost hurt, and completely helpless beneath Sasuke. "...A-asshole, you like it to see me t-this helpless, don't you?" He asked, scowling at the pretty boys in front of him.

"Of course I do." Sasuke said smirking and leaned in, kissing Neji roughly.

"How did you want to please us both?" The other one asked. Sasuke couldn't wait to have Neji in more than one way.

Neji kissed Sasuke for some seconds, before breaking it.

"O-one of you can t-take me, a-and.. ah.. I c-can suck off the other..." He answered, before moving forwards to try to kiss Sasuke again, which was hard since he was still being held down. Actually, he didn't mind it this much to be a bottom like this. They were doing almost all of the work.

"Hmm that sounds nice." The one not kissing said and he squeezed Neji's length a few times. The other one then broke the kiss and turned Neji on his hands and knees. "Last time I didn't get the chance to look at your ass, so don't move for a while." The other one said as he grabbed Neji's ass, massaging it.

Neji moaned as he immediately was red again. He was not thinking straight anymore. He just wanted to have an orgasm now and feel the same pleasure Sasuke gave him last time. He did move his hands back and quickly removed Sasuke's hands from his ass, being embarrassed about being stared at like that. He doubted about the use of it, but he did it anyway.

Sasuke just grabbed Neji's ass again, but instead of staring, he started licking the entrance. His other half moved to Neji head and kissed him again, very roughly.

Neji got the shock of his life as Sasuke was licking on the most sensitive part of his body, and gasped loudly, barely being able to kiss back. He did it anyway, as he was being moved upwards by the Sasuke he was kissing right now so he was sitting on his knees with his legs spread. Once more he was red and his hands moved down once more to push Sasuke's head away. This was so exciting, but also so embarrassing.

Sasuke just pulled Neji's ass up and continued licking the spot. He then grabbed Neji's erection and knew they'd better start the real thing soon.

Neji broke the kiss with a slight whine now.

"S-Sasuke I'm g-going to come." He then gasped, as he felt the pleasure becoming unbearable. He was getting so close right now.

"You're going to have to wait for a while." Sasuke said and then both of them sat up, one in front of Neji, and one behind him. The one behind him already put the head of his member against Neji's entrance.

"Open up." The other one said.

Neji swallowed nervously as he dropped himself onto his arms and opened his mouth obediently. He was slightly worried about his entrance that was tight as it had been before Sasuke took his virginity, and it was not lubricated. But Sasuke knew what he was doing, so he could expect something nice. He felt a flash of pleasure going through him and felt that his cock was already wet from precum.

"S-Sasuke..." He moaned lustfully, but also warning Sasuke how close he already was.

Sasuke's hand was now on Neji's cock and as he felt how wet it was, he got an idea as to lubricate Neji. He started stroking Neji and then used the precum to put in Neji's own ass. It was all they had, saliva wasn't always the best way. Sasuke made sure Neji was nicely lubricated before making any other move. The other Sasuke already put his cock in Neji's mouth, making both Sasuke's moan softly.

Neji moaned as he felt what Sasuke was doing. He slightly gripped Sasuke's organ and started moving his hand a little, and started sucking. He opened his legs a little wider as Sasuke was moving his fingers in to lubricate him. He couldn't help but wonder if Sasuke liked what he saw, since he had told him he would inspect his body for real this time.

Once Sasuke was done preparing Neji, he put his erection against Neji's entrance and slowly pushed into the now lubricated hole. He swallowed as he felt how good Neji felt. Both his mouth as his ass.

Neji moaned lowly as Sasuke's length filled him up completely. He was stretched dangerously, but he loved the feeling of pleasure and pain it gave him. It was exciting as hell, he got so excited from it he forgot to pleasure the other cock that was currently in his mouth. He was too focused to do something else.

Slowly, both Sasuke's started moving. The one thrusting into Neji's ass moaned loudly as he picked up a rather fast pace to start with. He knew Neji could handle it though. The other one slowly started moving his cock in Neji's mouth, but kept it gently, so Neji wouldn't choke on it.

Said person felt like he was in heaven as he was being fucked from both sides. He wanted to be touched even more, so he moved his arms back and grabbed Sasuke's hands, placing them on his butt rather hard, causing them to hit him, to which Neji moaned loudly. He didn't let go of the hands though, finding this position immensely exciting as he let Sasuke push him forwards onto the other one's cock, making him swallow deeper.

Both Sasuke's moaned even louder now. They looked down on Neji, who looked immensely hot and then they picked up the pace. Sasuke started thrusting deeper and deeper into Neji's cavern and the other one started moving in against it.

Neji kept his gag reflexes under control as he was deepthroating Sasuke now, moving forwards himself as well. He slowly let go of Sasuke's wrists, hoping that the other would catch the hint and grab his arms instead.

Sasuke did as Neji requested and grabbed his arms tightly, pulling back on them. He didn't want any of the friction he had now, to stop. Neji was so good at this, it was insane. And the fact that he felt both the friction from Neji's ass, as the friction from his mouth, was making him get to the point of release insanely fast.

Neji was even closer as Sasuke was, as he started tightening up and he felt his orgasm already starting. From the heavy sex they were having, he was sure that soon he would have to go to the bathroom to wash his whole body from all of the sperm that would come along with their releases. He let out a scream that was muffled away by the dick in his mouth as he had his orgasm and covered his whole stomach and chest with his own milky substance. The feeling was amazing, it was even better than it had been the first time.

Sasuke moaned at how much Neji tightened around his cock. He could also feel the moans Neji gave out and those two things combined made both Sasuke's come at the same time, spilling their seed inside Neji from two sides. They both thrusted a little, while having their release.

Neji coughed a little at the amount of substance that was being released in his mouth and the organ was moved deeply to the back of his throat, but he took it in by swallowing. He was shaking from the loss of energy as he enjoyed the feeling of Sasuke coming inside of him.

Sasuke recovered from his orgasm and as both of them pulled out, Sasuke made the one in front of Neji disappear and then collapsed on top of him, panting heavily.

"W-was that what y-you wanted?" He asked.

Neji groaned a little as he smacked down onto the bed, but enjoyed the softness of the bed beneath him.

"..Y-yeah." He then panted.

Sasuke rolled off of him now and then looked at Neji.

"I l-love you." He said, wanting to have said the words. Before he would leave this place and Neji behind.

Neji looked at Sasuke tiredly and nodded.

"I love y-you too, Sasuke." He softly said, giving Sasuke a smile.

Sasuke pulled Neji closer and then kissed his head before taking a deep breath.

"You should take a shower soon." He then said.

"..I know." Neji said, nodding. "But I'm tired.."

"Then maybe we should just go to sleep." Sasuke said and smiled at Neji.

Neji nodded as he rolled over a little and laid down against Sasuke, putting his head onto his shoulder.

"..I'll clean it up tomorrow.." He said as he yawned.

"Ok. Sleep well then." Sasuke said, and put his head on Neji's. All he needed to do now was wait for Neji to fall asleep. Then he would be out of here.

A/N: *blushes once more* What'ya think about this one, eh?


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

* * *

><p>The next morning, Neji woke up after a deep sleep. He wanted to cuddle against his boyfriend, but frowned when he didn't find someone next to him. Confused, he sat up and opened his eyes, looking around, searching. But the only thing he found was a letter on Sasuke's pillow. As Neji stared at the letter, he already knew what had happened. Feeling himself getting sick, he knew Sasuke had left him.<p>

"Fuck.." He whispered to himself, as he took the letter in his hand and opened it. He was silent for some time, not thinking about anything in particular, before he started reading.

_Dear Neji,_

_First of all, I love you. Don't you ever forget about that._

_Second, I left. You know where I went, I can't stand not having my memory anymore. After Kakashi arrived as well, I realized I can't move forward before I get my memory back. And for that I need to go to Orochimaru. So that's exactly what I did. I suck at letters, so I'm sorry. And I'm sorry for leaving. I can't offer you a future with me right now, it would be unfair to you and to me. _

_I told you, you could tell Itachi I went to Orochimaru after a month. Please keep to that. I don't want him ruining my chances. I don't know what else to write right now. So once again, I love you and don't forget it. I won't forget you either, I promise._

_Love,_

_Sasuke_

"..You asshole.." Neji growled, glaring at the letter as if it was his worst enemy, while he crumbled the letter in his hand. He'd better come back soon. He'd better get out of there alive. He had no idea what to do if Sasuke would die in there. Neji sighed, as he sat down onto his knees, while thinking of an excuse to make up for Sasuke's departure. He couldn't think of something straight away. In his rage, he lashed out towards the wall and hit it with so much power that cracks appeared in the wall. While overcoming the pain he felt a new pain exploding in his chest, as he tried to calm down. While he was panting heavily, he tore the letter apart and threw it behind the bed, not wanting to see it anymore. He got reminded of how hard this was as a low whimper escaped from his throat.

It didn't take long, before someone slowly opened the door of Neji's room. Shikamaru stood in the doorway, staring at Neji.

"I heard some strange noises. What's going on?" He asked.

"...Nothing." Neji bit out while his jaw started tightening up and he clenched his teeth together. He violently stood from the bed and yanked on a robe, not caring about the fact Shikamaru saw him naked.

".. Where is Sasuke?" Shikamaru asked, quick at making conclusions. He looked at Neji patiently.

"Gone." Neji shortly replied. Shit. Now he had to lie to everyone. He was furious with the fact that Sasuke left, but he couldn't help but obey to his wishes.

"To where?" Shikamaru asked. "Maybe you should calm down a little." He closed the door now.

"Don't ask me to calm down." Neji snapped. "I'm furious. He left and he's not coming back."

"Where did he go then? And how do you know he's not coming back?" Shikamaru asked, frowning a little.

"He wrote me a letter and he told me to not follow him." Neji snapped, looking away. The angry look on his face was soon replaced with a frown as he tried to swallow away his emotions.

"Then where did he go? He didn't leave to Orochimaru right? And sit down." Shikamaru said.

"He didn't write me where he went to." Neji said, as he shook his head. Instead of setting down, he walked towards the door. "I'm going to take a walk."

"Shouldn't you dress first?" Shikamaru asked. "If he didn't tell you where he went, then I bet he's gone to Orochimaru. We need to tell Itachi and the others."

"He promised me he wouldn't ever go there, so he probably just left the city to start a new life, without any of us in it." Neji said. "And I am dressed." He opened the door now and walked out, towards the stairs. He just needed to get out of here now. And fast.

Shikamaru followed Neji.

"I don't think so. Why would he want to leave you?" Shikamaru asked.

"To start a new life obviously." Neji snapped. "Just drop it Shikamaru." He walked towards the door and opened it, not caring about the cold of the morning right now. He just wanted to take a walk, to get rid of those emotions.

"Fine. But I'm telling Itachi he left. I'm sure he'll conclude the same thing I have." Shikamaru said, taking a turn to go see Itachi in the kitchen.

"For god's sake Shikamaru, do you want Itachi to get killed?" Neji suddenly snapped, as he turned around, getting even more angry. "... Understood? He left me, he left Itachi, he left Kakashi, he left 'everyone' behind."

"He just doesn't strike me as the person to just leave without gaining anything from it." Shikamaru said shrugging.

"Me neither no." Neji muttered, as he shook his head.

"Did he tell you he wanted to leave everyone behind?" Shikamaru asked.

"No, but that's what I assume when he writes that he wants a new life." Neji said, as he shook his head.

"... I guess you really need that walk." Shikamaru said. It was odd, that Sasuke would want a new life without Neji. But somehow, it made sense as well. He probably couldn't be with the ones he once knew, because they would make him remember he lost his memory too much.

Neji bit his lip for a second, before he turned around and walked out of the door, into the woods.

Shikamaru looked at Neji leaving and then sighed, before walking into the kitchen. Itachi, Deidara and Kisame were all there.

"Itachi... maybe you should sit down." Shikamaru said.

Itachi looked at Shikamaru and frowned as he heard the door fall closed and saw Neji leaving. He then looked at Shikamaru again.

"...Please don't tell me Sasuke left." He then said.

"I'm sorry. Neji got a letter from him this morning.." Shikamaru said. "The good news is, he didn't leave to Orochimaru."

"...Then where did he go?" Itachi asked, as he sat down. He felt like he had just received a slap in the face though. "Shit..."

"Are you ok Itachi un?" Deidara asked, looking at Itachi worried.

"He left to start a new life..." Shikamaru said.

Itachi let out a groan while he put his face into his hands.

"Shit... it's his own choice of course, but... shit.." Itachi muttered.

"I'm really sorry." Shikamaru said.

"Itachi?" Deidara asked again, putting his hands on Itachi's arms.

"I'm fine Deidara." Itachi muttered. "How is Neji?" He asked Shikamaru.

"Not too well. He left with just his robe." Shikamaru said. Deidara frowned now.

"You sure you're ok? The forest is not the right place to roam through in just a robe. I'd better get Neji back un." He said.

"I'm fine, but indeed, Neji should get back here." Itachi said, sighing.

"I'll go get him un." Deidara said and gave Itachi a quick kiss before leaving. He knew Itachi would be fine with Kisame there. So now he needed to find Neji. It didn't take long once he was in the forest before he spotted the brunette by a small brook.

"Hey Neji un." He said.

Neji looked up shortly, before looking away again.

"..Hey." He then said. Why did Deidara come here?

"You know, it's not very smart to go to the forest with just a robe on un. It can be dangerous out here." Deidara said.

"Sure." Neji muttered. "I could take them on if they wanted to do something." He looked at his legs anyway, that were half naked. Perhaps Deidara had a point.

Deidara sat down next to Neji now.

"I'm sorry about Sasuke. But this wasn't a very wise choice to make un." He said, smiling slightly at Neji.

"...Has someone ever been attacked in here for not wearing enough clothes?" Neji asked, making a weak attempt to make a joke.

"... I was un." Deidara said. "When I decided I would take a swim naked."

Neji looked at Deidara now.

"What happened?" He asked.

"Oh well there are gangs here that like to assault good looking guys and they won't hesitate if you walk around half naked or completely naked un." Deidara said and smiled. "What did the letter say?" He then asked.

Neji sighed as he looked away.

"I don't want to talk about it." He then said. "...I'm sorry for you about what happened."

"Oh that's fine un." Deidara said. "But really, you should talk about it. There's nothing worse than keeping your feelings inside."

"I did that for my whole life already, I think I can manage some more years." Neji muttered.

"You're not even half way with your life Neji. Really, it would be better to talk. Otherwise it will only hurt more un." Deidara said.

Neji bit his lip while staring at the water.

"I don't want to talk about it." He then said.

"You remind me of myself when I was younger you know un." Deidara said, looking at the water as well.

Neji was silent for some time, before admitting he was curious and looked at the blonde next to him.

"Why?" He then asked.

"I used to shove everything away as well." Deidara said. "And until Itachi came along, I thought it was doing me good un. But it didn't at all. All I was doing was lying to myself."

"..Lying about what?" Neji asked.

"First of all, that I didn't need emotions. Second of all, that I didn't need to talk about what happened un." Deidara said. "You're telling yourself not to give in to your feelings is best, but it's really not Neji un."

"...Showing those emotions has no use and people will think you're weak when you let them out." Neji said, as he shook his head.

"So.. what are you keeping inside un?" Deidara now asked. He wondered what had made Neji this way.

"..Nothing much." Neji stubbornly said.

"I'm pretty sure that's not true un." Deidara said, as he looked at Neji.

"Why do you want to know so badly?" Neji asked, as he gave Deidara a look. This conversation was bringing his damn problems up, while he had worked so hard to keep them inside.

"Because, I want to know if I can help you. Should I just tell you why I used to keep everything inside un?" Deidara asked.

"Fine." Neji muttered.

"I don't need help. I'm not weak."

"Help is not just for the weak. It's for everyone un." Deidara sighed. "But I'll tell you. When I was four, my parents had to flee with me to another city because we were outcast. And two years later they died, leaving me behind with nothing un. I became a terrorist out of anger, thinking if I could just blow up everything that got in my way, I would be fine. If I could just pretend I was a terrorist, then I didn't need to show any emotions and I didn't have to think about what had happened un. About being alone. Until I almost blew up myself and Itachi found me."

Neji frowned as he looked at Deidara now. Damn. And then he thought that 'he' had been insane.

"...But your situation is different.." He then said, feeling sorry for Deidara.

"That doesn't mean there aren't similarities. Would you tell me about you un?" Deidara asked.

"...Not so long ago, a monster attacked the city.." Neji started after he had been silent for some time, doubting. "...He set the whole city on fire and killed the whole village. Except for me... and Sasuke, who was there as well. I looked the monster directly into the eyes when it came walking towards me.. my parents protected me, but... " He bit his lip now, as he shook his head.

Deidara kept silent as he waited for Neji to finish. He knew how annoying it was when people didn't keep silent and you tried to tell them what happened. He remembered Kisame not being able to shut up when he wanted to tell Itachi and him about his past.

"...They were killed in front of my eyes and it hit me unconscious." Neji then softly said, almost whispering. "...The images are still hunting me. My whole family and all of my friends were killed and my entire city was burned down the ground."

"I'm sorry for you." Deidara said. "I get that you think pretending you're fine and acting tough will make you forget. But I'm sure the pain has only gotten worse un."

Neji's jaw locked once more, as he glared at the water now, not being able to say anything. He was too busy with pushing his emotions back. He didn't even notice that he stopped breathing. Until the pressure of his lungs started becoming painful. He let out a soundless gasp as he tried to fight down the feeling and breath without Deidara noticing.

Deidara pulled his legs to his body and stared ahead of him.

"It's hard to be alone. But the best thing you can do is talk about what happened and then find new people un." Deidara said. "The best thing you can do is try a little less hard forgetting and acting tough."

"..I g-guess." Neji said, swallowing as he started to feel panic. Why couldn't he breathe? He pressed his eyes shut as he felt the panic and emotions becoming worse and fought them down desperately. Shit. What was wrong with him? He couldn't hide it from Deidara anymore as he started to gasp for air.

Deidara pulled Neji close now, giving him a hug.

"Calm down and breathe un. Follow my pace." Deidara said, as he made sure his breathing was calm. He remembered he had passed out when he started talking to Itachi. Breathing would become irregular when people panicked.

Neji frowned in his panic as he clung himself to Deidara as tears started forming in his eyes. He felt the pressure becoming slightly less as he tried to focus onto Deidara's breathing. His heart was racing as he kept gasping for air. Finally a tiny string of air was allowed into his lungs and he started breathing in and out like mad, starting to hyperventilate. His eyes were completely wet now and tears started coming out.

"Now breathe into your own hands. It'll help un." Deidara said, letting go of Neji just slightly so he could put his hands before his mouth.

Neji followed Deidara's advise blindly as he clenched his hands together and put his hands in front of his mouth, concentrating on his breathing. He was relieved he was doing this, because at that moment his lip started quivering like mad as more tears came out and they came into contact with his own hands.

Deidara stroke Neji's back softly.

"It's ok Neji. You can let it out un." He said.

Neji shook his head desperately, trying to block away his emotions like mad as he clenched his eyes shut. Shit..

"You shouldn't fight it." Deidara said. "Really Neji, it's fine un."

Neji let out a whimper before he broke down completely and crouched from the pain he felt in his chest. God... He missed everyone so much..

Deidara pulled Neji close again and shushed him a little. He knew he shouldn't talk now. Neji just needed to cry.

Neji leaned against Deidara as he cried about everything he had cropped up so far.

"...I c-can't tell you how much I m-miss them... and n-now Sasuke left... I c-can't take it..." He whimpered, as he shook his head.

"I know.." Deidara softly said. He rocked Neji a little. "But you're really not alone in this un."

Neji kept sobbing as he grabbed Deidara's shirt and hid his face in it.

"..I w-want Sasuke to come back..." He whispered.

".. I can understand that un." Deidara said. "I'm so sorry for you Neji."

"..Don't s-say that.. please don't..." Neji sobbed as he shook his head.

"Sorry." Deidara said, stroking Neji's hair a little. "All I can tell you now is that things will get better. Even though it seems impossible now un."

Neji sniffed up his tears as he finally sat back and started wiping away his tears. He then looked at Deidara.

"...H-he's not coming back Deidara... he's not..." He then said.

"How do you know that un?" Deidara asked, frowning slightly.

"...I just k-know.." Neji muttered. He was so scared that Sasuke would die in Orochimaru's hands. He knew he would.. Sasuke should never even have went there in the first place.

"You can't know that for sure un." Deidara said. "Where did he go?"

"I don't know..." Neji softly said, as he shook his head. A clear sign for Deidara to drop the subject.

"... If you want to talk about things, you can always come to me un." Deidara said.

Neji looked at Deidara as he swallowed. He then nodded. He should not tell anyone where Sasuke went. He bit his lip, doubting... should he tell Deidara? There was a high risk that Deidara would tell Itachi.

"Don't forget that you can talk to me un." Deidara said, looking back at Neji.

"...I want to tell you something, but... you have to swear to me to not tell anyone." Neji muttered. "..Especially not Itachi."

Deidara was silent for a while, doubting, but then nodded.

"I promise un." He said. Neji needed someone. And if having to keep a secret from Itachi was gonna mean he would be that person, he would just have to do it. Neji shouldn't suffer the way he had.

"...Sasuke went to Orochimaru." Neji then said.

Deidara was once again silent now. Even though he could have expected this, he hadn't. So now he was gonna have to keep it a secret from Itachi, that he knew where Sasuke was. And that Itachi could get him back.

"... He told you?" Deidara asked.

"Yes." Neji said. "...We had a fight about it. He told me to not tell Itachi and lie to everyone about where he was... In a month I could tell Itachi."

"So you have to keep it a secret for a month un?" Deidara asked. That meant 'he' had to keep his mouth shut for a month as well.

Neji nodded.

"...When Orochimaru held me hostage, he waited two days before he started experimenting on me." He said. "If we can't help Sasuke for a month... I don't think he'll be alive around the time Itachi goes there... but he'll be furious if we come earlier, because then he probably won't have his memory back yet.."

"Maybe things are different for Sasuke. He has been there for four years before." Deidara said. "Maybe he'll be fine un."

"...I don't know... Orochimaru seemed angry that Sasuke had left.." Neji muttered, as he shook his head.

"That doesn't mean anything." Deidara said. "I'm pretty sure Sasuke pissed Orochimaru off more often un. He's good at pissing people off from what I've heard." He smiled at Neji a little.

Neji snorted.

"Good?" He asked. "He's a damn master at it."

Deidara chuckled a little.

"So I've heard. I'm sure he'll be fine Neji un. He can take care of himself." He said.

"...I hope so." Neji said, nodding.

"I'm sure about that un." Deidara said. "Do you feel a little better now?"

Neji nodded once more, as he stroke the last of his tears away.

"..Thank you." He then said.

"You're welcome un." Deidara said. "Now please come back home, so you can put on some clothes."

Neji chuckled a little now.

"Well I'm not that tempting to jump on you know." He then said.

"Sure Neji." Deidara said as he got up. "You haven't looked at yourself in a while haven't you? Practically everyone would jump on you un."

"It's not like the whole world is gay." Neji said, as he stood as well.

"No but there are plenty. And plenty amongst those who will find you attractive un." Deidara said and he and Neji started walking.

"You're hilarious Deidara." Neji dryly said. He then snorted. "I could be afraid that the men will think I'm a woman."

"You really think men won't be attractive to you?" Deidara asked.

"Yeah." Neji said. "I just had it twice until now that a man showed attraction towards me. A guy that offered me and Sasuke a place to stay, and Sasuke."

"I think you have more chance of men being attracted to you than me." Neji added. "I tend to scare people with my eyes."

"I tend to scare people with my character un." Deidara said, grinning a little. "I'm sure lots of guys look at you when you walk by, and not because of your eyes. You need a little more confidence."

Neji chuckled a little.

"You're not 'that' scary, right?" He asked. "You're only quickly annoyed."

"I can be very scary un." Deidara said. "I don't like guys asking me out and such, so I just go crazy on them. Itachi really is the only one who I allowed to flirt with me or look at me."

Neji smiled a little.

"And why did you allow Itachi to do that and no one else?" He then asked.

"Because have you ever looked at him? He's hot un." Deidara said and laughed a little. "No really it was because he treated me with respect. Lots of guys think of us as pieces of meat."

Neji chuckled now.

"Itachi is handsome yes, both him as Sasuke are lucky with their features." He then said. "But you said something about Itachi saving you from yourself. Do you want to talk about that? I must admit I'm curious."

"Around the time that you were a terrorist I mean." He added.

"Yeah I know what you mean." Deidara said. "Itachi started coming up to me every once in a while when I was travelling through here. And he was very nice to me and such, and I hated it 'cause I really didn't want to feel anything anymore. But I still fell for him, so I... well I actually attempted to blow up Kisame's house, knowing Itachi lived there too. I ended up getting hurt myself though and Itachi took care of me. In that time we got to know each other more and more and he made me realise that sometimes it's just not best to keep things to yourself. I'm sure that if he hadn't been able to get through to me, I would have ended up blowing myself up at some point."

"...So in the beginning you actually wanted to kill him?" Neji asked. Now 'that' was a story.

"..Yeah that was stupid un." Deidara answered, nodding slightly.

"Well thank god you didn't succeed." Neji said. "So Itachi taught you to not throw bombs at everything anymore and taught you how to love. That's beautiful."

"I know. I'm very grateful for him." Deidara said. "Like I said, without him I would have been dead by now un."

Neji smiled a little.

"I'm happy for you." He then said. "But I can also understand what it must feel like to have to share him with Kisame. Speaking of Kisame, how was 'his' childhood?"

"... Funny enough, he tried to kill Itachi at first too. Kisame had it rough. I don't know any details though, all I know is that he lost everything, had to raise himself and then got stuck in some freaky gang. Orochimaru was actually in that gang as well. While he was in that gang, he tried to kill Itachi for getting in the way, but Itachi stopped him and talked to Kisame. We both owe a lot to Itachi." Deidara said.

Neji raised his eyebrows and snorted.

"Itachi sounds like some kind of superhero." He then said.

"He's just the nicest man in the world un." Deidara said smiling. "Kisame and I were lucky to have run into him. I think we were blessed that he loves us."

"Don't think so low of yourself, I think Itachi is someone who is selecting some people as well, right?" Neji asked. "I don't think he could love 'everyone'."

"I know, but Itachi is a better person then me or Kisame could ever be un." Deidara said. "Itachi's special."

Neji nodded.

"I'm happy for you." He then said.

"Itachi says Sasuke is the same great person, he just had a lot to deal with and shows it a little awkwardly un." Deidara said.

Neji smiled a little.

"A little?" He asked.

"Right. He's probably a master at that as well un." Deidara said, laughing slightly.

"He has a lot of issues." Neji said, as they reached the house.

"Itachi says he had even more before un." Deidara said.

"I'm just afraid the frustration will come back when Sasuke gets back his memory." Neji said, sighing.

"I think both options aren't really great for Sasuke. He'll be frustrated without his memory and with un." Deidara said.

Neji nodded as they entered the house. He then turned around to Deidara.

"You have to promise me to not tell Itachi." He then said.

Deidara looked at Neji a little surprised for a while, before nodding.

"Once again, I promise un." He said. Itachi was gonna kill him for this, but Neji needed some help.

Neji gave Deidara a thankful look.

"..Thank you." He then said. "And again, thanks for before."

"You're welcome. Now go put on some clothes un." Deidara said and smiled at Neji.

"I will." Neji said, nodding. "Thank you." He then turned around and walked up the stairs, to put his clothes on.

Deidara watched Neji walk upstairs and then sighed. He wondered how much he was screwing up his relationship with Itachi right now. If he ever found out..

* * *

><p>That same day, Sasuke arrived at Orochimaru's hide out. He took a deep breath before descending down some stairs. He didn't know what would be waiting for him once he announced he was back. He still wasn't sure if it was the wisest decision, but he needed to try. Once in the hide out, he looked around, not having a clue of where to go. All he knew was that once he would start walking, the hallways would come back to him, like they had done when he had rescued Neji. So he just started walking. Hallway after hallway seemed familiar and his legs brought them to a room. He stopped in front of the door, sighed and then opened it. Immediately he was met with a stench that was close to unbearable. Like something was rotting away. He looked inside a dark room, but he could see everything. Kakashi was right about seeing well in the dark. He then rested his eyes on a man, who was slicing into a dead body, pulling out organs and blood vessels. It was disgusting. And it was exactly what he would expect from the man.<p>

"Orochimaru." Sasuke said, trying to keep his voice calm.

The snake man just smirked as he placed the heart of the person that was laying in front of him in a box. He didn't answer for some time before he let out a sinister chuckle.

"So you've come back, Sasuke?" He asked. "How sweet of you. What is it you need?"

"You know what I want. My memory back." Sasuke said, slightly annoyed because Orochimaru just chuckled at him.

"And why do you think I would know how to give it back to you?" Orochimaru asked. "You're still so naive, Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the phrase that was put behind his name by this man.

"I know you have something to do with me loosing it. So give it back." Sasuke said.

"Sure I have 'something' to do with it my boy." Orochimaru said, as he left the body and washed his hands. "But I did not snap my fingers to let your memory disappear. It was one of the side effects that could have occurred during our experiment."

"Then what did you do to me?" Sasuke hissed, not liking how Orochimaru talked to him at all.

"You should know that by now." Orochimaru said. "You should have noticed by now that your body changes once in a while."

"What do you mean?" Sasuke asked frowning. His body changes?

"When you grow really angry or get panicked Sasuke." Orochimaru said. "Your body form changes. Don't tell me no one ever told you you change into a monster that destroys everything on its path."

Sasuke was silent now as he stared at Orochimaru. He... changed into a monster? Did that mean...?

"You're just saying that, I don't change into a monster." Sasuke said, hoping he sounded calm enough.

"Oh you do." Orochimaru said. "You wanted more power, so I implanted the DNA of one of the monsters I own in your body. It worked magnificent. You become so strong that you can kill as many people as you like. Not too long ago you even wiped out an entire city I recall."

"That's not true, you're just messing with me." Sasuke now snapped. He couldn't be a monster... because that would mean 'he' had wiped out Neji's city. It would mean he had killed Neji's family.

"Why would I?" Orochimaru asked with a chuckle. "Since you don't know, you probably lose your memory during your transformation. You don't remember a thing of what you did."

"... It's not true, you just wanna freak me out." Sasuke snapped. It did make sense though. He lost his memory and was suddenly laying beside Neji. And that other time he was angry as well and lost a part. It made too much sense to not be true and it 'was' freaking Sasuke out.

Orochimaru smirked broadly now.

"Do you know who almost killed Neji the time you lost your memory and woke up while staring at Kabuto?" He asked. "Fill in the blanks Sasuke."

Sasuke looked at Orochimaru angry. He knew Orochimaru was right. It was the only explanation for it all. He 'had' killed Neji's family and he had tried to kill Neji as well. He was the one who had made Neji's life a living hell, it was all him. How could he ever face Neji now? How could he ever tell Neji that it was his fault he had lost everything? Sasuke swallowed, not wanting to look as weak as he felt. It was useless though. He was a horrible monster and he wasn't quite sure if he could live with it all. Coming here might have been the biggest mistake of his life right now, especially when he felt a panic attack coming up.

"So what is it exactly that you want from me Sasuke?" Orochimaru asked, smirking. "I can't remove the DNA anymore, sadly enough. I would have to take all your DNA and kill you with it."

Sasuke was silent for a while longer before he spoke.

"I wanna stay here to get my memory back." He said. If he was a killing machine, then he might as well stay here. Neji would not want him anyway once he found out. It would be better for everyone else if he stayed away.

"I could of course try to help you with it." Orochimaru said, giving Sasuke a sinister smile. "But not for free of course."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at Orochimaru right now. Of course not for free. But right now he needed his memory back even more. He needed to know why he would do something as stupid as becoming a monster. Or he would kill himself for being so stupid in the first place.

"What do you want from me then?" Sasuke asked.

"As you probably already noticed, I'm running a lab in here." Orochimaru said. "I would like to run some experiments on you. In exchange, I will tell you everything you wish to know and search for a cure to settle down the monster within you."

"What kind of experiments?" Sasuke asked, narrowing his eyes. Even though he knew he was probably going to say yes, he wanted to know what he would get himself into.

"I cannot say that yet, but most will be looking at your blood and reactions." Orochimaru said. He then smirked his evil smirk as he patted on the body. "Don't worry, you will not end up like him."

"I'd better not." Sasuke said. "Fine I'll do it." He was being stupid right now, but he deserved this. It was not like he had anything to go back to now. Nobody would want him, knowing he was a monster. He would just have to spend his life here, until he knew what to do next.

"Excellent." Orochimaru said, smirking broadly. He raised his hand, and suddenly there was a white snake crawling up over it. "My little comrade here will point you to towards your room. You must be tired."

"I'm not tired, but fine." Sasuke said. He wasn't afraid of a little snake. Although it freaked him out that it came crawling out of Orochimaru's clothes. Or even worse, out of his body probably.

Orochimaru walked towards Sasuke and handed him the snake, that immediately crawled onto Sasuke's arm and settled there. It turned his head back to the door Sasuke had entered through. Orochimaru just smirked before walking back to the table and picking up the knife again.

Sasuke looked at Orochimaru a little longer, before quickly leaving the room again when he started cutting up the body. He really didn't need to see that. As he followed the directions of the snake, Sasuke felt his stomach turn over. He was nauseous just from the thought of having killed Neji's family. And from the thought that he had tried to kill Neji before. It really felt like all he could do now was stay away from everyone else. All he needed to do was make sure Neji would never tell Itachi.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

* * *

><p>Three weeks later, Sasuke walked into the operating chamber of Orochimaru. He had been called out there for some new experiment, as if he hadn't gone through enough of those. Orochimaru had found him very interesting and he had been experimented and operated on more than any of the other people around. But Sasuke had finally gotten some more information. It wasn't much, just that he came to get power and that he had lots of skills. Even being able to summon snakes was no secret anymore. He had gotten back a lot of his powers already.<p>

"What do you want this time?" Sasuke asked, as he walked to Orochimaru.

"Lay down." Orochimaru said, as he pointed to a chair which was surrounded by all kind of tools. "I'm going to operate on you again, and this time might be heavier then the other times. So I want you to relax. I will give you some anaesthetic to ease the pain a little."

"What exactly are you going to do then?" Sasuke asked as he sat down on the chair and looked at the tools. They didn't seem like they could mean anything good.

"I'm going to operate on your brain." Orochimaru answered as he put on some sterile gloves.

Sasuke sat up and looked at Orochimaru as if he was crazy.

"And you're going to give me something to ease the pain 'a little'?" He asked.

Orochimaru let out a slight chuckle.

"Don't worry, you won't feel a lot." He said, as he leaned over Sasuke and put an injection in his head. "This operation is for your own good though."

Sasuke fought back a moan when Orochimaru gave him that injection. He never really liked the feeling.

"Then what will it do?" He asked as he laid down again.  
>"I hope to bring your memory back this way." Orochimaru said. "The outcome of some of the other experiments I had on you is that a part of your brain has been twisted because of the anger attack you had that made you destroy an entire city. It's in the memory part of your brain. There is a big chance that if I turn it around again, you will have your memory back."<p>

Sasuke frowned a little now, looking up at Orochimaru.

"... Why do you want to help me get back my memory?" He asked.

"It's not about wanting to help you Sasuke, it's about checking if my abilities go this far that I can get your memory back into your head." Orochimaru answered, as he gave Sasuke another injection.

"Jeez, you could warn me when you are going to give me injections." Sasuke said. "What if it goes wrong and I lose my memory again?"

"Then the operation failed." Orochimaru said. "Now calm down and close your eyes. You won't like what you see." He started preparing the tools now, getting ready for the operation.

Sasuke looked up at Orochimaru for a while longer, before taking a deep breath and closing his eyes. He'd do anything to get his memory back. If this was gonna be the way, then so be it.

"Tell me when you're going to start." He said, feeling nervous. Orochimaru was actually going to cut in his head.

"I'm starting now." Orochimaru said. "I'm first going to shave away some of your hair." He let his fingers stroke over Sasuke's head while inspecting it, searching for the right spot. When he finally found it, he started removing the hairs at that place, shaving them off.

"... So I'm going to have a bold spot... damn." Sasuke said, trying to make this more comfortable. It wasn't really working. He was glad he barely felt anything though.

"Don't worry, it will grow and you have to wear bandages around your head for a while anyway." Orochimaru said. "This can prick." He started to actually cut into Sasuke's head now, making a small block in Sasuke's skull so he could reach the brains.

Sasuke shut his eyes tightly as he could hear the knife running through his head. This was not his idea of fun. It really, really hurt.

"...S-stop for a second." He said. Those anaesthetics weren't working at all.

"If I stop now it will become even worse." Orochimaru said while he grabbed the injection needle again and put in a high amount of it. He removed the tiny piece of skull he had cut and used a pair of tongs to put it away.

"But it hurts... I s-said stop." Sasuke said, trying to sit up. But he wasn't able to with all the drugs in his head. He tried pushing Orochimaru's hands away instead.

"Sasuke." Orochimaru hissed as he grabbed Sasuke by the throat and pushed him against the bed. He then used one of the tongs and went right into Sasuke's brain, grabbed a piece of it and turned it around.

"Stop it!" Sasuke yelled now. Now 'that' hurt. Really, really, really badly. It was unbearable. "S-stop!" The screaming and struggling then stopped as he felt dizzy and started seeing flashes of his life. Flashes first of trying to kill Neji, then of destroying the city, of Orochimaru, of leaving, of Itachi. Everything was coming back. But it was going far too fast for Sasuke to comprehend it. All he could do was lay there.

Orochimaru watched Sasuke closely as he gave the piece another turn. He kept Sasuke down tightly while he carefully placed the piece of skull back. He reached backwards and grabbed a cup with a cream he had made himself to heal wounds as quickly as possible. He applied a tiny amount of it on the wound.

Sasuke tried to breathe, but it was hard now that he was remembering his past. It didn't take long before he could see his parents as well and his friends. And he also remembered how he had betrayed all of them. How he had been angry with everyone, how he had been jealous of Itachi and put his anger on him. He started to remember it all.

Orochimaru in the mean time was sewing the pieces of skin together, knowing Sasuke would barely notice it because of the pain he was in now. He slowly let go of Sasuke's throat and finished his work. After that, he grabbed some bandages and started tying them around Sasuke's head.

It took mere minutes for Sasuke to remember everything again, but it seemed to him like it lasted an eternity. He felt shivers going down his body, not knowing what to think anymore. He had been the biggest asshole on the planet, but he felt like continuing that now. All the emotional pain he ever had taken, was right there again. And Sasuke couldn't take it.

"Sasuke." Orochimaru said, once he was finished. "How do you feel?"

Sasuke said up groaning now, and then stared at the floor.

"... Thank you.." He softly said. He finally had his memory back. And even though his memories were screwed up, he was glad he got them back. He needed this to know where to go to next. He needed this to know who he was and what his goal was. He could figure that out now.

"It's fine Sasuke." Orochimaru said as he gave Sasuke a tap on the shoulders. "You should rest. Don't touch your head and try to not lay down onto it. I recommend you to sleep in a chair."

"I hate sleeping in a chair." Sasuke said and laughed a little. It was nice being able to say what he like and disliked. It was great knowing it. "Aren't you scared I'll leave now?"

Orochimaru let out a chuckle, that actually sounded like he enjoyed whatever Sasuke said.

"Dear Sasuke, don't you think that it's time for you now to continue on?" He then asked. "Even I don't want to ruin all the talent you have. You 'should' leave."

"I'm not leaving until I know what to do." Sasuke said. "Why do you think I should leave? Where am I supposed to go anyway?"

"Back to your remaining family." Orochimaru said. "There is nothing for you to search anymore."

Sasuke frowned deeply now.

"Why are you saying this?" He asked.

"What would you rather hear?" Orochimaru asked, pulling up an eyebrow as he was cleaning the tools he had used.

"I just don't get it. All this time you persuaded me into coming here and staying here, and now you're just gonna let me go?" Sasuke asked.

"I wanted to see the results of the DNA in you, what I have seen." Orochimaru answered. "Now get out of here before I change my mind."

Sasuke frowned even more now and then got off the bed, stumbling a little as he walked away.

"... Why did you want to see my DNA if you weren't gonna do anything with it?" He then asked.

"It's about the knowledge Sasuke." Orochimaru said, as he opened a box without looking at Sasuke another time.

"But what good will knowledge do you without using it?" Sasuke asked.

"Go to your room Sasuke." Orochimaru said.

"I don't get it anymore. Do you want me to stay here and go to my room or do you want me to leave? And once again, what good will knowledge do if you aren't planning on using it?" Sasuke asked. He then put a hand on his head softly. He was getting a headache.

"You should go to your room to rest, heal and then leave." Orochimaru shortly said. "Don't tell me you want to stay."

"I'm not going back. I'm staying here until I know what to do next." Sasuke said.

"Then you're going to have to undergo more experiments." Orochimaru said. "I won't let you stay here just like that."

"Fine I don't care." Sasuke said. "I still don't get why you would want me to leave."

"Like I said, it would be a waste to ruin your talent." Orochimaru said. "I tested it multiple times now, and I know what I wanted to know."

"Yeah, but I thought you would want to use it as well." Sasuke said.

"For what would I want to use it my boy?" Orochimaru asked. "I experiment, look and learn. That's all."

"Then what's the use?" Sasuke asked. He really didn't get why someone would want to learn just for the fun of it.

"You probably would never understand." Orochimaru said. "Now I would be pleased if you left."

Sasuke sighed now and then left the room. His head was hurting too much to continue that conversation anyway. He would just sleep a little and then figure out what was next.

* * *

><p>At the same moment, Itachi laid down into his bed with a sigh, in his usual place in the middle of the bed. He was more tired than he had been in months, and he had a huge headache. All he was longing for was to go to sleep now. He waited for Deidara and Kisame to come to bed, while placing his arms behind his head.<p>

A few seconds later, Deidara and Kisame came from the bathroom and laid down next to Itachi. Deidara was smirking and then rolled to Itachi.

"I want sex un." Deidara said.

"Yeah me too Itachi." Kisame looked at him, smirking as well.

Itachi furrowed his eyebrows now as he looked at both of his boyfriends. That was new, that both of them wanted to have sex at the same time. Sadly enough, he had to disappoint them.

"...I'm sorry guys, I don't feel like it." He said.

Deidara and Kisame's smirks disappeared as they looked at Itachi.

"What's wrong?" Kisame asked.

Itachi sighed as he shook his head.

"...I'm worried." He then said. "It still bothers me that Sasuke left without saying goodbye. I almost start to think that Kakashi said something against him that he didn't like."

"Like what?" Kisame asked. "I mean, Kakashi wouldn't say anything that would make him want to leave."

Deidara fidgeted with the sheets a little now.

"I don't think that either un." He said.

"Sasuke is difficult, it could be that Sasuke took it the wrong way." Itachi said, shrugging. "I hope it's not true of course."

"Are you worried he will do something stupid?" Kisame asked. "It's still odd he just left you like that. He was doing great here."

"Exactly." Itachi said. "I'm scared that he will be doing something to himself. People could hurt him. If he will be gone for longer I'm going to look everywhere for him."

"But he could be anywhere." Kisame said. "Maybe he's doing fine."

"I don't care where he is, I will find him." Itachi said, sighing. "I'm still so scared that he went to Orochimaru after all..."

"Neji said that wasn't where he went." Kisame said. "I'm sure he's safe in some city."

"It could be that Sasuke just said that so we wouldn't search there." Itachi said, frowning slightly. "I just hope he's ok."

"Yeah. He'll be fine if Orochimaru will leave him alone there un." Deidara said, and then bit his lip. Oh crap.

Itachi turned to look at Deidara sharply now.

"..What?" He then asked.

"Uhm nothing... just you know... if he goes to Orochimaru... he'll be fine if uuh... if he gets left alone un.." Deidara said. Oh he was such a bad liar. Shit, shit, shit.

"You 'knew' where he was all this time?" Itachi asked, suddenly glaring at Deidara.

"I'm sorry... but Neji told me and he made me promise not to tell you un." Deidara said, slightly panicking as he saw the look on Itachi's face. This wasn't good.

"Deidara you moron." Kisame said.

Itachi stared at Deidara some more, before he pushed the sheets off of him and got out of the bed, starting to dress.

Kisame got out of bed as well now, followed by Deidara.

"Itachi what are you doing?" Kisame asked stern, grabbing Itachi's arm.

"I'm leaving." Itachi said as he tried to snatch his arm loose. He shrugged on his pants now.

"You are not going to Orochimaru, Itachi. Don't be so stupid." Kisame said, not letting go of Itachi's arm.

"You can't leave, Orochimaru might hurt you un." Deidara said, still panicked.

"Kisame let go of me." Itachi snapped as he put on his socks. "I'm going to get him out of there."

"Orochimaru is dangerous Itachi. You can't just march in there and drag Sasuke back. He obviously chose to go there." Kisame said, still holding onto Itachi.

"I'm not going to wait for him to ever come back, Orochimaru might kill him!" Itachi snapped, starting to struggle against Kisame now. Not that it was of any use. Kisame was as strong as a bear.

Kisame grabbed Itachi's other hand now too and pushed Itachi up against a wall.

"Listen, you need a plan. You can't just storm in there and expect anything good to happen Itachi. 'You' might get killed." He said stern. Deidara just bit his lip, not knowing what to do.

"You can say what you want, but I'm going." Itachi snapped. "Now."

"Would you calm down and think for a second?" Kisame snapped back now.

"Why?" Itachi growled. "I'm going to take my brother back, that's all the information I need."

"Well you're at least not going alone." Kisame said. "I thought you were smarter than this."

"Shut up Kisame, I'm leaving." Itachi snapped. "Let go of me. Now."

"Fine, but I'm going with you. And calm down." Kisame said stern.

"Should I come too un?" Deidara asked.

"I don't care who's coming." Itachi said, giving Kisame a glare, as he started heating up.

"Deidara's staying home." Kisame said and then quickly dressed. "Be glad I'm letting you go Itachi, I could have tied you up on the bed as well. Now let's go."

"Why can't I go un?" Deidara asked worried.

"You know you could have been served in the kitchen immediately if you had tried that." Itachi snapped, seriously pissed off now. He quickly put on a shirt now.

"Just go you idiot." Kisame snapped now. Deidara just looked at Itachi and sighed. He would get it when Itachi got home again. He was pissed off and part of it was definitely because of him.

Itachi gave Deidara a slight glare now, before he stormed out of the room, ready to kill Orochimaru and take his brother back home.

* * *

><p>Itachi was storming through Orochimaru's hideout, tossing open each door he found in search of his brother. Kisame was running behind him, trying to keep up to Itachi's speed, but also kept his distance for when Itachi started spitting fire. Each time any of Orochimaru's people came running up to them to attack, Itachi would burn them without an excuse and storm on to the next room. Right now he slammed open a door where he found a person that could most likely help him further: Orochimaru. Itachi glared at Orochimaru with intense force.<p>

"Where is my brother?" He then spat. If Sasuke was in a bad state as Neji had been he would kill the guy straight off.

Orochimaru turned around now and smirked slightly as he saw Itachi standing there.

"Well hello Itachi. Oh and Kisame too. I was wondering when you would try to get Sasuke to come with you." He said.

"Where is he?" Itachi suddenly yelled, fire exploding around him, making Kisame dive away. He took a threatening step into the room, never breaking eye contact.

"He must be somewhere here, recovering." Orochimaru said, still smirking. "Maybe if you look a little better, you will find him."

"Do you have a death wish?" Itachi asked as he walked into the room fully now.

"Not at all, although from the looks of you, you want nothing more than to kill me." Orochimaru said.

"With pleasure." Itachi snapped. "That you even had the guts to lure him to you once, but now even did it twice. Give me one reason to not kill you right now."

"I don't have any. And for your information, Sasuke came to me both times out of his own free will." Orochimaru answered.

Itachi glared at Orochimaru and suddenly the whole room lit up because of the fire that appeared around him. He started walking towards Orochimaru in a fast pace, ready to kill him off immediately.

But he was stopped by a hand grabbing his own.

"Itachi... stop." The person having grabbed his hand, said.

Itachi turned around, glaring like mad, but all the anger and the fire disappeared when he suddenly saw Sasuke standing in front of him. He stared at him for a moment, noticing Sasuke didn't look too good, being bandaged and all, before hugging him close.

"God Sasuke... What did that bastard do?" He snapped. "I was worried sick. How could you have left?"

Sasuke couldn't help but hug Itachi back softly.

"I'm fine..." He said. "Orochimaru gave me my memory back."

"...What?" Itachi asked, highly surprised as he let go of Sasuke a little and stared at him.

"I have my memory back..." Sasuke said. "... I'm sorry for what I did to you Itachi."

"...Let's not start about that now Sasuke." Itachi said. "...Let's go back."

"I'm not going back." Sasuke said as he looked at Itachi.

"Why not?" Itachi asked, frowning deeply. "Sasuke I swear, if you're not coming back with me I'm going to drag you with me."

"You can't make me come back." Sasuke said. "Now that I have my memory back, I remember more than before. And I found out things that are... reason enough for me to break contact with all of you."

"Sasuke please don't..." Itachi said, frowning. "You can't do this. You can't do this to me, to not even start about Neji."

"You don't understand." Sasuke snapped now and then grabbed his head. Shit it still hurt. "I did things to Neji... I did things to you.. I can't live with the two of you, knowing what I've done."

"Time for me to leave." Orochimaru now said, and he was gone within a second.

"Sasuke, for the things you said to me you don't have to leave me." Itachi said. "I forgave you for it already. And whatever you did to Neji, I think it's nothing compared to what he would feel when you left him. "

"He will want me to leave." Sasuke said. "You don't know what I did.."

"Then at least tell him in person." Itachi said. "No, I don't know what you did, you're right about that."

"... I can't tell him." Sasuke said, shaking his head although it hurt. "I can't come back. Trust me, you don't want me to come back."

"If you realise the things you did were wrong I want you to come back." Itachi said. "At least let me take care of you now. Then you can decide to leave."

"I can't see Neji.." Sasuke said. Damn, he felt his emotions coming up and he wasn't feeling strong enough to push them away. He might just have to tell Itachi what he did, and hope it would scare him off.

"Then I will let Kisame go first and tell Neji to stay in his room or whatever." Itachi said, as he shook his head. "Unless you don't want to come at all."

".. I don't know." Sasuke said, shaking his head again as he felt tears prick in his eyes. Dammit. "I just can't see Neji. Neji has to leave because I..."

"I'll let Deidara and Neji hang out together, don't worry Sasuke." Itachi said. "If you need time, that's fine. I will tell Neji. He won't like it, but I'm sure he will respect it."

"No he won't Itachi, I freaking killed his family!" Sasuke now yelled and then grabbed to his head again, giving out a moan. He hated being this weak right now.

Itachi frowned slightly now.

"...Why?" He then asked.

"I allowed Orochimaru to implant monster DNA in my own... When I get angry I become a monster.." Sasuke softly said, looking away. "I was the monster that killed Neji's family... I even tried to kill him.. I can't face him, I can't face anyone anymore so just please, go back without me." He was almost begging now as he looked at Itachi. He felt like a small, stupid child, but he just felt too miserable to care.

"...Sasuke... the fact that you regret this makes you into a good person." Itachi said, frowning even more. "Neji will be angry, I know that. But give him some time. He will forgive you in the end. And you have to forgive yourself as well. You don't remember anything about you in your monster state, so probably the monster took over. You can't help it that it happened. And the fact that you allowed the DNA into your body is not your fault either. It's dad's fault. Please Sasuke, I will ask you one more time to come back home with me."

".. I can't come back with you.." Sasuke said as he let some tears fall. "I can't be judged anymore.. if one more person tells me that I'm not good enough I swear I will kill myself.. I can't deal with other people anymore.. I don't deserve it anyway."

"Sasuke..." Itachi said, as he brought Sasuke close to him again.

Sasuke really broke down at that point as he started crying.

".. I g-got all these other feelings when I lost my memory and now I have them back and they don't fit... All my life I've been trying to push those feelings out but now they're here and I ruined everything, I ruined myself... D-dammit I hate who I am.." He said, feeling his head throb.

"..Then it's time now to change yourself." Itachi said. "And letting go of your past doesn't mean letting go of the people who have anything to do with it. You will feel guilty for the rest of your life. The best advice I can give you is try to make up for your mistakes until it feels right for you, talk about your problems and try to not be too hard on yourself."

"How the fuck am I going to live with myself knowing I killed mom and dad, and Neji's family?" Sasuke asked now, still crying and resting his head against Itachi's shoulder. He was losing it.

"You didn't kill our parents Sasuke." Itachi said. "I know it's hard."

"I left and mom died because she missed me.. I'm s-sure she blamed herself." Sasuke said. ".. I ruined so much.."

"...They both never blamed you for it Sasuke..." Itachi said, as he stroke over Sasuke's back.

"Yes they did.. And so do you.. And so will Neji.." Sasuke said and then put a hand on his head again, this was just too much. "I need to lay down.."

"Shh..." Itachi said. "Tell me what you want me to do now Sasuke.. take you with me and let you heal, without telling Neji about it, or leave you here?"

"... If I come back... what do you think everyone will say when they find out?" Sasuke asked, feeling his knees getting weak.

"Most of them will be extremely happy to have you back." Itachi said. "They will forgive you for what you did. Neji will be more difficult, but he will forgive you in the end. He hasn't been doing well without you these past weeks."

"But I'm responsible for him feeling so miserable, not just because I left.. I don't think anyone will forgive me.." Sasuke said.

"I think 'you' will be the one who won't forgive yourself." Itachi said.

"... No I can't.." Sasuke said. He then quickly grabbed Itachi by the shoulders, trying to stand up straight. He shouldn't even be out of bed now.

Itachi quickly scooped Sasuke up in his arms now.

"Tell me now Sasuke..." He then said.

Sasuke leaned against Itachi now and sighed.

".. I wanna go home.." He then said. He felt too miserable to protest now.

"Good." Itachi said, nodding. "Then let's get out of here." He turned to Kisame now. "Let's go."

Kisame nodded and they started walking out of the hide out. It didn't take long before Sasuke fell asleep. Sadly enough, he didn't have any nice dreams. All he had was nightmares of what he had done.

* * *

><p>A week later, Sasuke was sitting on a chair, staring out the window. He had let himself be trapped inside Itachi's room ever since he came back, not wanting to see anyone. Not much had happened, except for the fact that he had been miserable. At that moment, Sasuke saw Neji walking out of the door, enjoying nature like he always did. Sasuke averted his eyes for a second, before looking back. Neji still had no clue he was there. He had no clue what he had done either. It was hard looking at him from the window. He then saw Deidara sneaking up on Neji, and grabbing the hair tie he had in his hair, before running away laughing, like a maniac. Sasuke had expected Neji to be mad, but instead Neji ran after Deidara, tackling him and then starting to romp around with Deidara. And he was laughing. Sasuke bit his lip against the tears, but he was too late. Seeing Neji like this made him feel even more miserable. Not being able to enjoy that laugh, not being the one to make him laugh. But he was too ashamed of himself to face Neji. Sasuke buried his face in his arms now, so that no one could see him crying.<p>

At that moment there was a knock on the door, and Itachi walked into the room. He immediately looked worried as he saw Sasuke crying, and he walked up to him. He frowned slightly when he heard laughter and when he looked out of the window he suddenly understood Sasuke's tears. He sighed and knelt down next to him, pulling Sasuke into his arms while shushing him.

Sasuke was a little startled to feel someone pull him in his arms, but when he felt it was Itachi, he just continued crying.

"... I wanna see him.. but I can't.." He whispered.

"...You should try it Sasuke.." Itachi softly said. "..If you want I can ask Deidara to tell him what happened, so he can get used to it before you see each other again."

".. I don't w-want him to hate me.." Sasuke said, still crying. He couldn't stop those stupid tears. "... I don't want him to know I'm a monster." He held onto Itachi's shirt now.

"You'll have to tell it to him one day Sasuke.. I'm sure he will forgive you in the end, just give him some time.." Itachi said, stroking over Sasuke's back.

"..I c-can't, but I miss him so much..." Sasuke said. "... I can't stand that he's laughing without me."

"Deidara is doing his best to make it more enjoyable for Neji.. but it's hard." Itachi said. "He's missing you a lot. As much as you miss him."

"He won't miss me anymore when he hears what I've done." Sasuke said, pulling away from Itachi a little and wiping some tears away.

"..Why won't you just try it?" Itachi asked.

".. Because what if he'll hate me.." Sasuke answered, staring at the floor.

"If you don't do something you'll never have him back." Itachi said. "If you try, you could have him back."

Sasuke was silent now, still staring at the floor. Itachi did have a point though. But he could never tell Neji himself. He wouldn't be able to stay strong, he was already breaking down.

".. If I tell him it will be a disaster." He softly said.

"Do you want me or Deidara to tell him?" Itachi asked. "Deidara has gotten very close with Neji."

Sasuke frowned a little now. He hated that someone had gotten close to Neji and he couldn't talk to him.

"... I guess Deidara can tell him." Sasuke said.

"Alright." Itachi said, nodding. "I think it will be alright Sasuke. I'll call Deidara and then I'll tell him and let him go to Neji. I'll let you know when Neji knows."

Sasuke nodded and then rubbed the front of his head a little. All this commotion made his headache he had been having the past week, even worse.

".. Can you ask Deidara to tell him I love him?" Sasuke asked.

Itachi smiled a little, and nodded.

"I will." He then said. He gave Sasuke a kiss on the head and then showed him the plate he had been carrying with him. "Here, I brought you something to eat and something against the pain. I hope it helps."

Sasuke smiled slightly at Itachi now.

"Thanks. I'm not very hungry though." He said. "How did you get that medicine? I don't remember you being very good at healing and such."

"Neji made it." Itachi said with another smile. "Deidara said to Neji he had a huge headache and Neji made him this medicine. But Deidara of course didn't have a headache, he meant to give it to you."

Sasuke smile faded now as he looked at the medicine. He was thankful Deidara had done it, and he was sure that this medicine would do him good, but Neji didn't make it for him. This just sucked. He then quickly swallowed the medicine.

"Itachi, are you still angry at Deidara for not telling you where I was?" He then asked. He had heard the story from Itachi.

"Slightly." Itachi answered. "I'm just glad you're back and safe now. And I'm happy for you that you got your memory back."

"If you're still angry at Deidara for that, then how long do you think it will take Neji to forgive me? If he even will." Sasuke asked.

"It's a different case Sasuke." Itachi said. "You could have died in there. You're more dear to me than anyone, that's why."

"It's not a different case at all, except that mine is worse." Sasuke said. "I could've died because Deidara didn't tell you, but I already killed what was most dear to Neji."

"But you didn't do it on purpose." Itachi said.

"I still did it." Sasuke said, shrugging a little.

"I know." Itachi said. He then sighed a little and stood. "I'll tell Deidara. Try to rest a little, ok?"

Sasuke nodded and started eating the food Itachi gave him anyway. He didn't want to disrespect anyone anymore.

"Tell me how it went ok?" He asked.

"I will." Itachi said. He gave Sasuke another kiss on the head, before standing up. "I'll come back later." With that, he left the room and closed the door behind him, to tell Deidara.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

* * *

><p>Later that day, Deidara was pacing back and forth in the hallway, before walking into the living room to get Neji. Itachi had asked him to tell Neji about who Sasuke was, and that Sasuke was here at this very moment. And Deidara was freaked out by it, not knowing how Neji would react. The only thing that made him do this, was because Itachi was still mad at him and he had to do everything he could to make up for not telling Itachi he knew where Sasuke was. Now he had to spill another secret and Neji would probably want to kill him for not telling him, but Itachi was more important now. And Neji needed to know as well. Deidara now walked to Neji and sighed.<p>

"Can I talk to you Neji? Alone un?" He asked.

Neji looked up from the couch where he was reading a book.

"...Sure." He said, seeing this was serious. He put his book away and stood. "Where? And about what?"

"Outside. I'll tell you what it's about when we get there un." Deidara said and started walking. He was really, really, really nervous about this.

Neji frowned slightly as he followed Deidara. He hadn't seen Deidara this nervous in a while. The last time was when Itachi had suddenly stormed out of the house together with Kisame, of which he still didn't know the story. Did this have anything to do with that?

When they were finally near the forest, Deidara stopped walking and turned around to Neji.

"You have to promise not to kill me un." He said.

"...Depends on what you're going to tell me." Neji said, giving Deidara a slightly worried look.

"No, promise me un." Deidara said stern. "I won't tell you about Sasuke otherwise." Deidara was silent then, comprehending what he had just said. Damn, he and his big mouth. Keeping it shut was obviously something he had to work on.

Neji's face fell right into a stone expression when Deidara mentioned Sasuke's name.

"What do you know about him?" He demanded.

"W-well... uhm... I.. I know that.. you know.. I err.. Well he has his memory back un." Deidara said. This was even harder then he thought. That look on Neji's face was scary.

"How do you know that?" Neji asked, frowning as he took a step closer to Deidara.

Deidara quickly took a step back now.

"... B-because Itachi went to get him a week ago un.." Deidara said.

"What?" Neji now snapped, a deep frown marring his face. "Where is he? Why didn't someone tell me about that?"

".. He asked us not to." Deidara said. "... He's been staying in Itachi's room recovering."

Neji fell silent for some time now, feeling a sting of pain going through him.

"Why did he ask for that?" He asked. To think that Sasuke had been in the house for a week already, and he hadn't had any idea.

"Because he found out something about himself." Deidara said. "And he's afraid to tell you, so he asked me to do it un. It will be very hard for you to take."

"...What is it?" Neji asked, reading himself for the worst.

"... Well... your city was attacked by a monster and it killed your family.. That was Sasuke un." Deidara carefully said.

Neji felt his breath get stuck in his throat as his eyes widened.

"...What?" He asked. No... it couldn't be... right?

".. I'm sorry. Back when he was with Orochimaru, he let him implant monster DNA in his body. To get stronger un... It turned out that when he was angry, he would turn into that monster and go berserk.." Deidara said, worried about Neji.

Neji frowned deeply as he looked away, staring at nothing while he was thinking.

"...So the time when I was almost killed..." He started. He then shook his head. How could he ever face Sasuke again? How could he let himself be touched by the hands that had killed his family...?

Deidara looked at Neji sympathetically now.

".. I know it's hard for you... I can only imagine un. But Sasuke asked me to tell you that he loves you very much. He didn't know what he was doing." He said.

Neji bit his lip as he closed his eyes.

"...I want to be alone for now." He then said.

"Are you sure, I wouldn't want you to do anything stupid un.." Deidara said.

"You can't ask me to not do something stupid after what you just told me." Neji muttered, as he shook his head. "...This is too much."

"... He's so sorry for it Neji... you should know that un." Deidara said. "Please think before you act. I know it's hard, but you're gonna regret it if you do something stupid un."

Neji clenched his jaw together as he kept on staring somewhere else, before he turned around and walked away from Deidara, towards the woods. He had to be alone now. He had to think of this, what he should do with the information Deidara had just given him. And.. he had to think of how to face Sasuke now.

* * *

><p>The next day, Sasuke was sitting in bed, just having woken up. It was pretty early in the morning, but he couldn't sleep after having heard about Neji's reaction. He had just become angry and confused and then marched off into the forest. Sasuke figured this was probably the end of them for real. Neji probably didn't wanna have anything to do with either him, or the people around him. It made him nervous and anxious and it even slightly panicked him. He wanted to step out of bed at that point, but then heard the door open and when he looked up, expecting it to be Itachi, Neji was standing in the doorway. Sasuke wanted to speak, but saw the look on Neji's face. It was like it was carved out of stone. It didn't move, it didn't show emotion, it didn't show anything. Sasuke felt his stomach turn as he looked at Neji, not knowing what to do.<p>

Neji looked at Sasuke for some time, before lowering his eyes and sighing.

"...So it's true hm." He then said, as he closed the door behind him.

Sasuke looked away now, not wanting to look at Neji for a second longer. That look of disappointment was way too much.

"... It is.." He said.

"..I don't really know what to say." Neji said. "I know you couldn't help it, but it makes me feel like I'm not safe around you."

Sasuke swallowed silently now, staring at the ground. That hurt. All he wanted was for Neji to feel safe and loved around him. Now he had ruined it.

"... I'm sorry... I guess you're not safe around me.." He said.

"I'm sorry for saying that to you Sasuke, but that's how I feel now." Neji said. "..You even tried to kill me when you got angry with me."

"I know that... you don't need to remind me." Sasuke said bitter. ".. I can't say anything to make this better. You'll just have to leave me."

Neji looked at Sasuke now, slightly frowning.

"How much control do you have over your own body when you change into a monster?" He asked.

"None." Sasuke answered, still looking away. He didn't understand why Neji was standing there so calmly. The only conclusion he could make was that Neji just didn't care about him anymore.

"...But you do remember what happens?" Neji then asked.

".. I do now that Orochimaru messed with my brains." Sasuke answered. "Look Neji... just go. I can't give you what you want anymore.. you'd be better off with someone else." He looked at Neji now, his eyes slightly wet, but hoping Neji wouldn't see the despair on his face.

"...If I wanted someone else I wouldn't be standing in this room right now." Neji said. "Of course I'm upset that you were the one who took away everything I had, but for now you're the main goal in my life, 'you' are the one who makes me happy. I want to search a way how to be able to stay together, but how I still will be safe."

Sasuke looked at Neji for a while and then put his head in one of his hands, starting to break down. He just couldn't understand Neji, he couldn't feel happy about this at all. As he felt tears rolling down his face once again he cursed slightly. He had wanted Neji back so badly, but now that Neji was trying to figure out a way for it, all he could do was feel even more worthless and less deserving of a happy life.

"...Sasuke please don't cry now.." Neji said with a slight frown. "...Do you even 'want' me back?"

".. I don't get how you would still want me.." Sasuke softly said, still with his head in his hand. He couldn't look at Neji. He had ruined Neji's life, he didn't deserve him at all.

Neji sighed a little as he sat down onto a chair next to Sasuke's bed, coming slightly closer.

"If you had killed them on purpose our relation would be over without any doubt." He then said. "The thing is that the only thing you can help is that you allowed the DNA into your blood."

".. I still did it..." Sasuke said. ".. You were devastated from it... I can't.. I can't be with you knowing I'm the one who caused you pain." He tried wiping away his tears, but there only came more.

Neji frowned now as he stood and sat down next to Sasuke. He then hugged him.

"...I can't help but love you Sasuke." He then said. "I'd be in even more pain if I also had to say goodbye to you."

Sasuke was silent for a while, before grabbing Neji tightly and burying his head in Neji's neck. He was still crying.

"I don't get how you don't wanna leave me.." He softly said.

"I explained it to you already Sasuke.." Neji said. "The monster in you isn't you, it's someone else, a piece of a different spirit, taking over your body. You had nothing to do with wiping out my village."

".. Then what do you wanna do now?" Sasuke asked. If Neji wanted this, but was scared of him now, how would they ever work out?

"Trying to not make you angry I guess..." Neji muttered. "And staying close to you. May it go wrong, I will face you and take over your body instead."

"... That won't be an easy task.." Sasuke said as he pulled away from Neji a little to look at him. "I'm stronger then you, you know."

"...When Orochimaru held me hostage, he has sent a lot of monsters into my cell, to test my eyes." Neji said. "I stopped most of them, just at the end it became more difficult. When I'm on normal energy I can stop any person."

".. Do you know how many of your family members tried to stop me?" Sasuke asked now. "..You can't stop me Neji. And I don't wanna put you in danger."

Neji immediately stiffened up when Sasuke said that.

"...Oh." Was the only thing he could say.

Sasuke now softly pushed Neji away and got up, walking to the window.

"... I'm sorry." He said.

"..I know you are." Neji said.

"I felt miserable the past few weeks, especially the last one... you were happy without me Neji. I know you think you could be happy with me, but I'm not that sure." Sasuke said. "I'm not the person you fell in love with anymore."

"..Deidara kept me happy." Neji said. "He did his best to make me happy all the time, but you have no idea how many times I cried when I was in my bed alone."

"... You missed the person I was when I didn't have my memory. I'm not that person Neji." Sasuke said, shaking his head.

"...The only difference I see now is someone who keeps on blaming himself." Neji said.

"I have reason for that." Sasuke said, staring out the window.

"I know." Neji said. He then sighed, and stood. "Well, I tried the best I could. Let me know when you can let me in again." He turned around and walked out of the room now. This was too hard.

Sasuke quickly turned around now, making his headache worse, but followed Neji nonetheless and grabbed his hand.

".. I wanna let you in.. But I don't think it's fair for you to be with someone who doesn't even know who he is himself." He said.

"I've been doing fine up till now with you, you know more of yourself now than before." Neji said, frowning at Sasuke.

"... I was someone completely different before I met you Neji." Sasuke said. "... I don't know which Sasuke is more me, the one who had his memory, or the one without.. I just don't know."

Neji looked at Sasuke for some time before he shrugged his arm loose and left the room. He did not want to deal with Sasuke for now.

Sasuke watched Neji go and then retreated to Itachi's room again, locking the door. All he was doing was ruining things. But Neji deserved someone who felt worthy. Neji deserved someone who knew who he was, someone who was strong. And right now, Sasuke couldn't offer him any of that.

* * *

><p>That same evening, Itachi walked into his own room to talk with Sasuke. He saw Sasuke sitting on his bed and he could immediately feel the tension in the air: his conversation with Neji probably hadn't been well.<p>

"Hey." He said. "How did it go?" He sat down next to Sasuke now.

"Like crap." Sasuke said bitterly. "I knew I shouldn't have told him. I should have pretended to have gone away for good."

"What did he say then?" Itachi asked, frowning. "Was he angry?"

".. No. He said he was scared of me, but wanted to try it anyway, because he loved me. And then I started thinking..." Sasuke said.

"...About?" Itachi asked.

".. About who I am and why I would even consider being with Neji. He deserves better than me. He deserves better then a good for nothing piece of shit, who doesn't even know who he is anymore." Sasuke answered bitter.

"Sasuke, you might think like that, but Neji doesn't." Itachi said. "He loves you and he only wants you. He has been so upset when you were gone, I think you may praise yourself the luckiest man on the planet that he still wants you."

"Well then he's stupid for not thinking the same way." Sasuke snapped. "He's not thinking at all, because if he was then he would be running away. He must know I can't give him what he wants. Hell, I don't even know if I'm going to be alive for a whole lot longer. I don't want to put him through any more misery."

"Then allow him to be with you again." Itachi said. "I don't get you."

"Well that's no surprise, I don't get myself either. All I know is that I'm messed up and I can't allow myself to mess Neji up as well. And don't tell me he'll be messed up if I break up with him, because that is bullshit." Sasuke snapped. "You wouldn't be with someone who was as insane as me either. Frankly, I don't understand why you're letting me stay here anyway." He felt anger boiling up inside, but ignored the danger it brought.

"Because you're my brother and I care about you." Itachi said. "Why can't you get it in your head that we still love you?"

"Because it's stupid, that's why." Sasuke hissed now and then grabbed to his head, before glaring at Itachi.

"It's not stupid Sasuke, you have to put this mentality aside." Itachi snapped now.

"If I think it's stupid, then it's stupid. It makes no sense at all! Why would you love a person who has done nothing but wrong! Why love someone who made everyone's life a living hell, either by being there or leaving!" Sasuke yelled now. "It's just insane to love me, so stop it!" He groaned as he felt his headache becoming more and more painful. He knew this was going wrong, yet he couldn't stop it anymore.

"Sasuke please stop thinking so low of yourself." Itachi said, frowning deeply now.

"No I won't, it's the truth and you know it!" Sasuke yelled. "And it is very, very frustrating when people keep on denying it! I don't want to ruin anything anymore, so just please fuck off! All of you!" He then crouched down on the floor, clenching his head tightly from the pain that became unbearable. It spread through his entire body now.

Itachi gave Sasuke a worried look as he quickly knelt down next to Sasuke.

"Calm down Sasuke." He said. He tried to help him up. "Let me lay you down on the bed."

But Sasuke pushed Itachi away with more force then he himself had even expected.

"STAY AWAY FROM ME!" He yelled and then grabbed to his head again as he could just feel his body changing. And there was nothing he could do to stop it. All he could do was scream from the pain it brought.

Itachi let out a gasp from shock as the force that he was being pushed away with lead him to fly through the room and crash against the wall. He immediately knew what was going on. Sasuke was turning into the monster.

"...Sasuke, try to fight it." He then said, wondering if this was hopeless or not.

Sasuke wasn't listening at all though. All he could do was wait for it to happen, wait for himself to turn into that monster and probably take out everyone who got in his way. It didn't take long before his limbs started growing and he changed colour as well. He grew claws and teeth and muscles that were insanely big. And then the transformation was complete. Sasuke was in his monster form once again. He stayed crouched down on the floor for a while though.

Itachi stared at his brother, inwardly cursing Orochimaru for doing this to him, as he slowly rose from the floor, trying to make no sound. He knew that he had to get out of here. He didn't want to fight Sasuke, he didn't want to hurt him. So it would be better to sneak out and warn the others. He carefully took a few steps towards the door, his eyes fixed on his brother.

At that exact moment, Sasuke looked up, a look of terror in his eyes. And then he let out the most deafening roar anyone could produce, before storming to Itachi and grabbing him, throwing him through the room. Sasuke was no longer himself anymore.

Itachi's eyes widened, and just when he realised what was going on he again hit a wall, this time having it knocking him unconscious. He fell down on the ground limply, not moving anymore.

Once Itachi wasn't moving anymore, Sasuke ran through the house, breaking walls and everything else he could reach. He then managed to get down the stairs and found almost everyone panicking when they saw Sasuke, who came running up to them. In no time, he had Kiba and Karin knocked out, soon after Suigetsu followed.

Deidara ran to Kisame now (who to him seemed like the only one who could take Sasuke on).

"Itachi was with him just now un!" He yelled, worried sick that maybe Itachi was... dead now.

"We have to get out of here." Kisame said. "Neji, run for your life, he might be going after you!" He barked at Neji, who immediately ran out of the door, while Kisame broke the window and jumped out, taking Deidara with him.

When Sasuke saw Kisame yelling at Neji, Sasuke's attention immediately focussed on him and ran after him, breaking the door in its process and knocking Juugo out as well. He gave out another roar as he saw Neji running towards the forest, and then followed him. He came closer and closer to Neji within seconds.

Neji cursed under his breath as he quickly ran towards a tree and climbed in, hoping that Sasuke wouldn't be able to follow him. He started sweating now. Shit. He actually had to flee for his life now.

Sasuke was with Neji in an instant, but instead of trying to climb the tree, he just started ruining it, taking pieces of it with his claws. It wouldn't take long before the tree would fall, with Neji in it.

Neji bit his lip as he held on as tight as possible, and looked around frantically if he could jump into another tree, but it was impossible. When the tree started croaking he quickly jumped out of it again and while Sasuke tossed the tree away, he started running again. He ran towards a huge tree and hid behind it, hoping Sasuke would just run by when he would focus again.

Sasuke didn't lose Neji out of his sight though and ran after Neji, then rammed his hand through the tree, just above Neji's head, before pulling it back and looking behind the tree, spotting Neji again.

Neji let out a shocked gasp as he quickly turned around to run away once more, but he knew that the end was getting near now. There obviously was no way out and Sasuke was far too close to him now. He just wished that Sasuke was planning something else with him then killing him.

Sasuke let out another roar now and then was able to grab Neji by the arm and slam him back into the tree. He then pulled Neji away from it and threw him at least ten metres away, storming after him.

Neji let out a yelp of pain as he hit the ground hard, and just when he pushed himself up a little Sasuke was right above him, his breath on his face. Neji swallowed deeply as he stared at Sasuke. He then stared at Sasuke intensely, and tried to get in, to take over Sasuke's body.

As soon as Sasuke felt someone trying to take over, he hit Neji across the face hard, making him fall to the ground again. He then grabbed Neji's by the hair, his claws slicing Neji's skin and pulled him up, growling. Neji winced in pain as he was being held up onto his hair like that, but kept looking into Sasuke's eyes, trying harder then he normally did. He tried to force Sasuke to let go of him, trying to not pay attention to the dizziness the hit had brought him, but Sasuke just grabbed Neji tighter. He then threw Neji away again, this time making him hit a tree. Growling and showing teeth, he came storming towards Neji again. His claw was already up in the air, ready to give Neji the final blow.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 17**

* * *

><p>"Sasuke stop it!" Neji then yelled, almost screamed, as he scrambled up from the ground and ran behind the tree.<p>

But Sasuke was already close enough again, to drag Neji from behind the tree and slam him back against it.

Neji frowned as he hit the tree and looked at Sasuke, seeing him coming closer. He knew for sure now that he was going to die. He felt panic rushing through him like mad, and when he saw the fist coming closer, he was simply scared to death. He could do nothing else then scream and pray for his life now.

"Sasuke please stop it!" He then screamed out of fear for his life. Sasuke had lost it badly.

Just when Neji thought he was going to get hit, the fist was pulled away and Sasuke kept still. He was frowning and growling, but his fist wasn't moving. His grip loosened. And he stared at Neji, as if hoping he would say more.

Neji frowned deeply as Sasuke stared at him. In his panic he tried to get loose, but the grip was still hard enough to bruise him in the process.

"Please let me go!" He then yelled, hoping it would make Sasuke go back even more.

Sasuke's grip on Neji loosened now as he kept looking at Neji. He growled, as if fighting against himself as his grip tightened, then loosened again.

"... Neji.." He then growled.

Neji stared at Sasuke, not being able to remove the scared look from his face.

"...Please tell me you won't kill me." He then said.

Sasuke suddenly quickly pushed Neji away and then turned around, then back to Neji again and then grabbed his head. He was fighting himself and the monster in him. Somehow, Sasuke had become conscious after hearing Neji so scared. He just couldn't stop it completely yet. The monster inside of him was so strong.

Neji quickly stood again, the push having been hard enough to toss him on the ground again as a weak doll, and he walked back carefully, hoping to get away. He was bleeding badly from when Sasuke had slashed across his chest, and he was still so dizzy.

Sasuke watched Neji from the corner of his eye and the monster in him made him follow Neji once again. He could not stop himself from grabbing Neji, but managed to take a turn and hit a tree instead of Neji. He kept pounding into the tree, telling himself to stop. To turn back. He had to stop this, because otherwise he would kill Neji.

"Sasuke please calm down!" Neji now yelled, trying to get loose, but Sasuke's hand could practically go around his waist.

Sasuke finally managed to let go of Neji again and then turned to him, looking as if he had lost his mind again. But then he talked again.

"Don't run..."

Neji looked at Sasuke and then understood that Sasuke was trying to take over his own body. So he complied and stood still, just looking at Sasuke while he bit his lip, trying to not panic. Of course, when he ran away Sasuke would follow him. How stupid of him. Sasuke was more of an animal right now then a human.

Sasuke looked back at Neji for a while, then managed to take some more distance and then let out a softer roar. His head was hurting and he felt like he could faint any time, which probably meant that if he did that, the monster would take over again. So he was trying his hardest not to lose consciousness. He felt his knees go weak and let himself drop to the floor. He had to do this to save Neji.

Neji automatically took a step back and swallowed right after, telling himself not to move. Coming closer might be threatening for Sasuke, running away would be a sign of weakness.

Sasuke started breathing in and out heavily and then grabbed to his head again. His head moved forward slowly until it hit the ground and he felt like he was shaking. It wasn't that he was shaking though, he was turning back to his normal self.

Neji let out a sigh of relief as he pressed himself against a tree when he saw Sasuke slowly becoming smaller and smaller. He was changing back into his human form.

Once Sasuke was back to his own self, he was shaking and not just a little. All he was wearing was his torn up pants, the rest had been torn to pieces, and his headache had never been worse. But he didn't care about that. All he cared about was the people he had hurt. Especially Neji and Itachi.

Neji looked at Sasuke and quickly went to his side, helping him up.

"God.. are you ok?" He then asked, searching for wounds. His eyes widened as he saw that Sasuke's head was bleeding. "Shit.. we have to get back to the house. You're bleeding."

Sasuke put his hand on his head, wincing a little from the contact and then looked at his fingers, that were now covered in blood. He then looked at Neji.

"It doesn't m-matter... Are you ok?" He asked, trying to stand on his own.

"Of course I'm ok, we need to get back to the house to stop the bleeding." Neji said, as he helped Sasuke up and made him lean on him.

"... No we need to get to Itachi first." Sasuke said, not wanting to lean on Neji, but needing to anyway.

"And he's in the house." Neji said, as he started to walk. "Come on." He ignored his own wounds because now, Sasuke was more important.

"You're hurt too.." Sasuke said as he and Neji walked back. ".. Someone needs to look at those wounds.."

"I'll look at it myself, don't worry." Neji said. When they arrived home they saw that the whole house was a mess, and a few people were unconscious. Karin was just waking up, Shikamaru, Itachi and Suigetsu were still out of it and Kiba was awake, trying to help the others to wake up together with Kisame and Deidara.

"Hey." Neji said, while he helped Sasuke into the house.

Sasuke quickly looked away as he saw everyone who was awake staring at him.

".. Are you ok Neji un?" Deidara asked worried, then turned to Itachi, who he was sitting next to. The elder had just let out a moan.

"Yeah.. I'm ok." Neji said, nodding to Deidara. "I need some bandages for Sasuke though, do you know where I can find them?"

"Wait a second." Kisame said as he walked towards the kitchen and started searching for bandages.

"Woah man, you look bad." Kiba said, frowning to Sasuke. "Are you ok?"

".. Don't ask me that." Sasuke said as he pulled away from Neji and stumbled to Itachi, sitting down next to him like Deidara had. Sasuke could care less about himself.

"Come on, it's not like you can help it." Kiba said, shrugging. "How is Itachi anyway, Deidara?" He was taking care of Shikamaru in the mean time. Karin now stood to wash her face.

"I'm not sure.. I'm sure he took quite the blow un. Itachi wake up." Deidara said, shaking Itachi softly. Sasuke kept silent now as he looked at Itachi and grabbed his hand softly. If anything serious had happened to Itachi, he would never forgive himself.

"Seeing his face I believe that yeah." Kiba said, frowning. Half of Itachi's face was all black and blue. He took a look at Neji, who wasn't looking all too good himself.

Deidara stroke through Itachi's hair now, still worried sick.

"Itachi please wake up un." He said, shaking his boyfriend again.

"Neji go take care of yourself." Sasuke said, his eyes not leaving Itachi for even a second.

Kisame came walking back with the bandages now and handed them to Neji, who gratefully took them.

"I'll take care of you first, your head is bleeding." Neji said, as he took some of it off and started to wrap it around Sasuke's head. Kisame sat down now and stared at Itachi as well, hoping for him to wake up.

"Damn.. he probably has a concussion." He said, as there was still not a reaction coming from Itachi.

"... I hope that's all he might have.." Deidara said, continuing to stroke through Itachi's hair and over the cheek that wasn't bruised. "Thanks for saving me Kisame un.."

Sasuke let Neji take care of him, as he felt his eyes getting heavy. He was tired, but he didn't want to give in. Not until he knew everyone was ok. He turned around slightly and saw Shikamaru waking up.

"Don't stress about it." Kisame said as he kept looking at Itachi.

"Shika!" Kiba meanwhile cheered, giving Shikamaru a big hug. "Damn sleepyhead, you'd better stay awake! And I know you weren't knocked out for real, you just acted like you were."

"Yeah well running away would have been a stupid thing to do. Might as well keep quiet." Shikamaru said, rubbing his head.

"... Can't we do anything to wake him up un?" Deidara asked.

Everyone looked at Itachi now, and Kiba let out a snort.

"Funny that no one is really concerned about Suigetsu." He said.

"I was concerned." Juugo bluntly said.

"..Suigetsu will be fine." Sasuke said and pushed Neji's hand away out of reflex when Neji made the bandages touch his wound too hard.

"Sasuke calm down." Neji immediately snapped. Right at that moment though, a groan came from Itachi.

Sasuke leaned forward immediately, ignoring Neji for a second. Deidara did the same thing, quickly grabbing Itachi's hand.

"Itachi? Can you hear me un?" He asked.

Itachi frowned slightly as his hand moved up to his head, and let out another groan in response.

"Itachi." Kisame now said, hoping to get more out of Itachi then just a groan.

Deidara stroke Itachi's hand now as everyone looked worried and waited patiently for Itachi to say something. Sasuke even stopped breathing for a second. What if Itachi was anything but ok?

Itachi slowly opened his eyes, letting out just another moan, as he rubbed over his head. He immediately closed his eyes against the light again.

"...My head hurts." He then groaned, his voice sounding hoarse.

"Oh thank God un." Deidara said, letting out a sigh as he heard Itachi's voice. ".. You'll be fine." Sasuke let out the breath he had been holding.

"Do you remember what happened?" He asked.

"...Not really." Itachi muttered. His mind was all clouded right now, he only felt immense pain.

"We need to get him in a bed and give him a painkiller un." Deidara said.

"He has a concussion doesn't he?" Sasuke asked.

"Probably, and not a small one either." Neji, who had been observing Itachi as well, said. He finished tying the bandages around Sasuke's head. He then walked towards the kitchen and started cleaning his own wounds.

"Can you carry him Kisame un?" Deidara asked, not letting go of Itachi's hand. Sasuke now got up and followed Neji into the kitchen. He knew Itachi would be ok, they had to talk later. Right now, he had to talk to Neji.

".. Neji.. I'm so sorry.." He said, once he was in the kitchen, next to Neji.

Neji looked at Sasuke while he was pulling off his shirt to clean the wound better, and he let out a slight sigh.

"It doesn't matter Sasuke." He then said.

"Look at me and say that again." Sasuke said, a look of guilt on his face when he saw all of Neji's wounds.

Neji bit his lip slightly.

"Look.. of course I didn't like what happened, but you can't change this." He then said. "The monster is inside of you, it's part of who you are. I love the rest about you, which is so much more than just the risk of you becoming a monster."

".. I said look at me." Sasuke said. "How can I believe you, if you can't even look at me?"

Neji looked at Sasuke now.

"You won't believe me anyway." He then said.

".. I was stupid for not believing you or Itachi." Sasuke said. ".. It's hard to understand why you would still love me.. but I believe you do now."

"You do?" Neji asked, pleasantly surprised by that.

"I do... and I love you too." Sasuke said. "I still don't think you should be with me, and I still have issues... but if you want me... I would be the biggest moron in the world not to accept it."

Neji slightly smiled now.

"Well.. I'm glad to hear that." He said. "Let me ask you one thing though. Why did you become a monster this time?"

".. I was mad at you and Itachi for loving me.. 'Cause I just don't think I deserve it. It got angry because of it.." Sasuke said.

"..Did you become angry of furious?"

"Furious." Sasuke answered. ".. I broke down.."

"Do you think that something like this might happen again?" Neji quietly asked. He didn't want to admit it, but he had been really scared.

"I don't know.. Not if I can get happy again." Sasuke softly said. "It only happens when I really break down... it seems to be anger that does the trick, but it's really despair. I just show it as anger.."

"So just now you were just desperate, right?" Neji asked, trying to not sound like he was saving his own butt.

"Why do you wanna know Neji?" Sasuke asked, knowing these questions weren't just out of curiosity.

"..Just to know for sure you won't change all of a sudden." Neji said, shrugging.

"... So you're scared of me." Sasuke said, looking at Neji with a look of guilt once again obvious on his face.

"Well.. not scared, but if I have to run for my life every month or so..." Neji said, shrugging.

"Then you don't wanna be with me." Sasuke said, finishing Neji's sentence.

"...I'm not sure." Neji said. "Like I said, I love you and don't want anything more than being with you, but having such a high risk to die... I couldn't get away Sasuke."

".. I get it.." Sasuke said and then looked at the ground. He then let out an awkward laugh. "..Guess I shouldn't have thought it could work out now."

"...Sasuke please... tell me that it's an emotion you barely ever feel..." Neji muttered. "You tore the whole house apart looking for me..."

".. If I had been a good person I wouldn't ever feel it.. right now I feel like giving up all the time.." Sasuke said. ".. I thought maybe you and Itachi could save me... but I understand now that I can't ask that of you."

"I want to make you happy so you won't have those feelings anymore Sasuke, but I need to know how intense this emotion is." Neji said. "Because if you turn into a monster every time you get angry, then it's an impossible case and I'll be dead within a month."

".. If you say things like that, you make it worse.." Sasuke said. "It's just so stupid that all the time I could have had with you I wasted on trying to find my memory. And now that I have it, I'm wasting my time trying to forget.. I'm just not meant to be happy I guess."

Neji just let out a sigh now.

"...You're only making things more difficult for yourself." He then said. "I'm just asking you a question Sasuke, and all I need is an answer."

"No you're asking me questions I don't have the answer to Neji." Sasuke said. "I don't know if this will happen every month, I don't know how I will feel tomorrow or in a week or in a month. I think I have it under control, but I just don't know."  
>"The only thing I want to know is what emotions you feel when you become a monster." Neji said, frowning deeply while getting frustrated.<p>

"I just told you didn't I?" Sasuke said annoyed. "Despair, devastated, like giving up, that's what I feel like when it happens."

"Well I obviously missed that part." Neji now snapped. "Considering your reaction just now, I guess I have to think about this some longer. You said you wanted me back, then why are you acting so difficult?"

"You're the one who isn't sure whether he wants to be with me or not you know. That's why I'm being 'difficult'." Sasuke snapped back. "You're still scared of me, you still hate a part of me, so why the hell should we even try? 'I' want you, but not if you're not sure whether or not you want me too."

"I can't believe you Sasuke, I just want to know how big the chance is that I'm going to die and if you don't want to give me a safe feeling by answering my questions I won't ever feel safe with you again." Neji snapped, giving Sasuke a glare.

"Yeah well I don't know how big that chance is." Sasuke snapped back. "That's what I'm trying to tell you."

"And 'I' am trying to find that out." Neji snapped with a slight growl. "You have your damn memory back, you know what happened when you became your monster state. I don't get it how you can't remember how often you feel the emotions you felt when you became a monster before 'this'. I know that me crying almost never happens, unless I have an emotional period. Then I cry once or twice in a week. Don't you have any knowledge about yourself?"

"Yeah well things have changed in my life you idiot." Sasuke snapped back. "I 'used' to turn into that monster every month or so, but I also 'used' to hate Itachi and I also 'used' to refuse to love someone. Things have changed, so I don't know how often anything will happen."

"That's not what I asked from you, is it?" Neji growled. "You know what, stay in this room, go cry in a corner, filled with self pity, and I'll let you hear if I will stay with you or not. 'Now' you gave me the information I needed, thanks 'a lot' for answering my questions this fast." He then turned around, walked out of the door and slammed it closed behind him.

"Whatever." Sasuke snapped after him and then went upstairs to check on Itachi. Neji would never understand it anyway and he would just be unhappy staying here. So if he wanted to go, then Sasuke was gonna let him.

* * *

><p>Itachi closed his eyes while Karin was busy with healing him. He still had a huge headache from the concussion, and Karin was healing his damaged head. He could feel the throbbing pain easing away. Like always, healers amazed him. They could take pain away as quickly as it came. As he felt Karin was nearly done, he opened his eyes.<p>

"Thank you Karin." He then said. "I feel the pain erasing already."

Karin nodded at him, smiling.

"You're welcome. You should be able to do the things you usually do now, with a slightly higher risk of getting a headache though. That headache should be gone in a few hours." She said, nodding once again and taking the stuff she had used to heal Itachi with, with her. As soon as Karin was out of the room, Kisame got up to close and lock the door, as Deidara sat down on the bed next to Itachi and grinned at him.

"You know we should celebrate you're ok un." He said.

Itachi slightly snorted at his blonde lover now.

"I'm still having a slight headache you know." He then said.

"Well they say sex works wonders with headaches un." Deidara said and wriggled his eyebrows as Kisame came walking back as well.

"Scoot over." He said as he sat down on the other side of Itachi, smirking broadly.

Itachi sat up a little and smirked at Deidara.

"You guys'd better make it true." He then said, as he pulled Deidara closer and kissed him full on the lips.

"Oh we will." Kisame said as he pushed the two smaller men to the middle of the bed and then sat down beside them, starting to kiss Itachi's neck. Deidara just pulled on Itachi's clothes as he kissed his lover back passionately.

Itachi let out a slight moan as he followed his uke's wishes and loosened his shirt and pants, letting Deidara undress him. He moved an arm backwards and used it to pull Kisame against him. He kept on kissing Deidara though, making the kiss slightly fuller.

Both Deidara as Kisame pulled off Itachi's shirt completely and Kisame made quick work of Itachi's pants. Deidara chuckled a little into the kiss now.

".. You've never undressed before me when it's just the two of us un.." He said, obviously enjoying that with Kisame next to him, he had a little more power over Itachi. Kisame laughed a little, before starting to kiss from Itachi's neck to his chest.

"Hmm.. let's hope you like the change." Itachi hummed as he moved his hands under Deidara's shirt now. He knew Deidara needed a little more attention than Kisame right now. And if Kisame didn't like it he knew he would show it immediately.

Deidara looked at Itachi and then let him pull off his shirt, before diving in for another kiss. Kisame now managed to get to one of Itachi's nipples and started sucking on it as his hand came closer and closer to Itachi's underpants, and especially what was in them.

Itachi moaned while he moved his hand into Deidara's pants and stroke over the hardening bulge in them, trying to get Deidara in the mood. He was obviously teasing Deidara right now.

As Deidara moaned as well and bucked his hips slightly, Kisame stopped kissing and sucking on Itachi's skin.

"Give me a little attention too will ya." He said, grinning, but obviously meaning it too.

Itachi gave Kisame a slight smirk now.

"I'm taking care of my uke here now." He then said. He did turn his head a little and kissed the huge man on the lips passionately, while he kept on stroking Deidara.

Kisame grabbed Itachi by the hair and kissed him back. This time, Deidara took his chance to touch, kiss and lick Itachi's body, while moaning from what said man was doing to him. Both Deidara's hand as Kisame's now moved down and they stroke over Itachi's cock at the exact same time, not caring that each other's hands were in the way.

Itachi let out a groan as the actions from both his lovers lead his underwear to slide down, making him fully naked. And excited. He started to harden, so he quickly pulled down Deidara's pants as well. He then reached backwards and started tugging on Kisame's pants.

Kisame pulled off his pants and shirt and once all three of them were completely naked, he kissed Itachi deeply again and started to stroke Itachi's length roughly. Deidara tried pleasing Itachi as well, but Kisame was in the way, so he scowled a little, trying to push Kisame away.

Itachi noticed while moaning, and he grabbed Kisame's hand and guided it towards his ass instead, allowing Deidara some space in front of him. To make it up to Kisame he moved his hand back and started stroking the blue haired man behind him.

Deidara immediately kissed Itachi now and started to rub his cock again, now that Kisame had something else to do. Said man groaned at Itachi's movements, but did as requested anyhow and started rubbing Itachi's entrance firmly. His other hand was wrapped around Itachi's body, toying with one of his nipples.

Itachi gasped slightly while he kissed Deidara, enjoying the touches of both boys immensely. He did know that now he had allowed Kisame at his entrance he wouldn't let go of it anymore, so he had to work on getting Deidara in the mood. So he broke the kiss and lowered himself down, letting go of Kisame, and started to lick over Deidara's organ, while moving one hand under Deidara and starting to stroke his entrance.

Deidara had to move back a little and grabbed Itachi by the hair as he started licking. He moaned loudly and swallowed a little at seeing Itachi so... not dominant. It was both weird, as strangely empowering. Kisame smirked now and started inserting his fingers into Itachi's body, rapidly thrusting them in and out. He knew Itachi barely needed any preparing.

Itachi groaned a little as he immediately started deepthroating Deidara, knowing he should hurry. He stopped for a moment to wet his fingers and then he continued again, moving his fingers over Deidara's entrance, teasingly pressing onto it.

Deidara started panting heavily now, closing his eyes as Itachi worked his body so well. So far for any power he had had over Itachi. Kisame now grabbed Itachi's cock again, giving it a firm squeeze.

"Hurry up with that uke of yours. I'm not gonna wait a whole lot longer." He said.

Itachi let out a groan, wanting to glare at Kisame, but of course he was too occupied at the moment. He did what Kisame asked him to do and pushed two fingers into Deidara, gently getting him prepared for the big deal.

Deidara let Itachi prepare him for some longer, before stopping Itachi's hand and head from moving. He then let himself fall on his back gently, moving his hips up a little and looked at Itachi.

".. I'm r-ready un.." He breathed out. He didn't want to make Itachi or Kisame wait any longer.

Itachi nodded as he looked at Deidara's body hungrily and immediately crawled on top of him, letting Kisame's fingers slide out of him. He kissed Deidara passionately and took a hold onto Deidara's legs. He slowly slid into his uke now, already feeling a presence behind him that could only be his huge seme.

Deidara moaned and threw his arms around Itachi's neck, closing his eyes again. Kisame then pushed Itachi over even more and grabbed his hips, before pushing into Itachi and then immediately setting a pace, making Deidara moan once again, since it made Itachi move as well.

Itachi moaned loudly as he barely had to move anymore, as Kisame moved both of them forwards and pulled them back.

Deidara grabbed Itachi's head now, moaning loudly. Kisame's pace was a lot faster and heavier then he was used to. If they kept this up, he would come very fast and Itachi would have to get him in the mood again. Kisame now even made his thrusts a little harder.

Itachi broke the kiss while panting.

"K-Kisame, easy.." He then gasped.

"I'm n-not going to slow down." Kisame groaned to Itachi. "Y-you're used to this, so let's get blondie used to it as well." As to prove his point, he gave a deep, heavy thrust, making Deidara whimper.

"It's f-fine.. ah.. Itachi un.." He moaned, spreading his legs a little more so the thrusts that he knew would come later, weren't going to hurt too much.

"Y-you sure?" Itachi asked Deidara, as he placed his hands on the bed, making sure that his thrusts into Deidara wouldn't be with the same strength as Kisame used on him.

"..Y-yes.. don't h-hold.. hn... back un.." Deidara moaned back as he felt that Itachi was doing just that. He wanted to please Itachi the exact same way Kisame did, only then as his uke. Kisame started to give slow and very deep thrusts now, ones that Itachi couldn't stop.

Itachi moaned loudly as he kissed Deidara's neck and kept on moving inside of Deidara. He frowned slightly as he felt Kisame's organ throbbing inside of him, noticing Kisame was close already. Sometimes it was like Kisame was a sex bomb, exploding within just a few minutes. They were just getting started.

Deidara's breath got stuck in his throat for a second as Kisame gave such a hard thrust, transferring that to Itachi, that he came instantly, spilling his seed over his own and Itachi's body. As Kisame, and thus Itachi, kept thrusting, he moaned. It made his orgasm really long and good, but a little painful as well.

Itachi did everything he could to make Deidara's orgasm as pleasurable as possible, trying to stop his body from moving forward and giving Deidara kisses everywhere and slightly stroking over Deidara's nipples. He himself was moaning and panting as Kisame kept on thrusting inside of him with his huge cock, making him shake in pleasure and sweet pain.

"D-don't hold back un..." Deidara whined, softly hitting Itachi's chest. Kisame smirked as he started licking and sucking on Itachi's neck while keeping his pace steady now. He knew Deidara needed to get back in the mood and he was just about nice enough to give him some time for that. Otherwise, the thrusting would really start to hurt.

"I don't want to h-hurt you Deidara." Itachi panted, as he started stroking Deidara again. He looked at his hot uke and licked his lips, trying to think clear while Kisame kept moving in and out of him.

Before Deidara could respond, Kisame pulled Itachi up on his knees, making Itachi's organ slip out of Deidara's body. He grabbed Itachi tightly and started thrusting into him like a mad man. You could hear from the sounds it created, that Itachi's ass had a lot to endure. As Deidara looked up at Itachi getting fucked like that Deidara started panting. For some reason, that was a very arousing sight. His hand moved to his own cock and he started stroking himself, staring at Itachi and Kisame.

Itachi gasped and groaned, and sometimes let out a soft scream as Kisame hit his point immensely hard. When he tried to move down to Deidara Kisame pulled him back, and when he tried to let Kisame ease down punishment soon came by an even harder thrust. So he just took it, tossing his head back into Kisame's neck, panting like mad.

As Deidara watched the scene a little longer and he had turned himself on as well, he moved up to grab Itachi's hand, wanting more than just his own hand on his cock. Kisame continued his thrusting though and he kept Itachi to himself, until he came inside of him, digging his teeth into Itachi's neck a little.

Itachi actually let out a whimper now as Kisame's sharp teeth came into contact with his currently sensitive skin. He shivered as he felt Kisame filling him up. He waited for Kisame to pull out, before he lowered himself towards Deidara and started stroking him as well, getting him onto the mood.

Deidara moaned as he felt Itachi back on top of himself and put his legs around his body.

"... I w-want more then s-stroking un.." He moaned and then kissed Itachi roughly. Kisame in the mean time was busy turning himself on again.

Itachi kissed Deidara back passionately as he once more pushed in, having the need of fucking Deidara again as well. He arched his back though, to both reach Deidara's point as to present his backside to Kisame, knowing it would excite the blue skinned man greatly.

"Y-you just can't get enough, can you." Kisame said smirking as he looked at Itachi and was quickly behind him again, kissing and rubbing Itachi's body. Deidara held onto Itachi's shoulders and looked at him with a look of lust on his face. His point was being hit so wonderfully now, he was begging Itachi with his eyes to keep it up a little longer.

Itachi read the language in Deidara's eyes and hit Deidara's point precisely and at a pace he knew Deidara liked it the most. Pleasure was racing through him like mad as he did this, but he also enjoyed Kisame's touches.

Deidara threw his head back now, enjoying Itachi inside of him, moving like that, the best he could. But then he felt the thrusts changing again and when he looked at Itachi again, he saw Kisame behind him, pounding heavily.

Itachi gritted his teeth together and kissed Deidara's neck, before arching his back even more, to keep on hitting Deidara's pleasure point. He himself was slowly coming closer as well.

Deidara pushed his head back again, as this time, Itachi managed to give him sweet pleasure, but Kisame made it deeper and faster and therefore even better this time. Apparently a change of angle was all Deidara needed to squirm and moan louder than he had ever did.

Itachi was pleasantly surprised to have Deidara writhing beneath him like this, enjoying the sight. It was simply beautiful to see, and it made Itachi come close to his orgasm right away.

Kisame felt Itachi coming close, since his ass was tightening around his cock. And it felt amazing. He looked at Itachi pounding into Deidara and knew neither of them were gonna last very long.

"...O-oh... G-god Itachi un!" Deidara moaned. He was gonna come any time now.

Itachi groaned in response and started thrusting faster and harder, wanting Deidara to come quickly as well. He quickly grabbed Deidara's organ and started stroking it, as he was already becoming dizzy from pleasure.

"..H-haah... hn.. a-almost.." He groaned, lowering his head while panting.

Kisame made his thrusts even heavier and with two of those, Deidara's hips rolled and he threw his head back, coming heavily and screaming Itachi's name. He came all over them, but he really could care less as he felt pleasure take over his body and his ass clenched around Itachi's still thrusting cock.

This led Itachi to let out a scream as well, hiding his head into Deidara's neck as he had his orgasm. The heat of Deidara clenching around him together with the view was too much. He kept on slightly thrusting into Deidara as he enjoyed his sweet release, panting into his neck heavily.

Like some kind of wave, Kisame groaned and bit Itachi's neck again as he came as well, thrusting into Itachi heavily while he released inside of him, enjoying Itachi tightening. Deidara just closed his eyes as he held Itachi weakly and panted like mad, barely having any breath left.

Itachi gasped as he let Kisame slip out of him, the last of the sperm splattering over his butt, while he got off of Deidara and crashed down next to him, panting loudly. He closed his eyes as well, spend after his amazing orgasm.

Kisame just sat down on the bed, smirking at both boys that were exhausted now.

"You're a bunch of pussy's, exhausted already." He said, panting just slightly. Deidara just let out a groan, that meant Kisame had to shut up. He kept laying on his back though, his hands beside his head and breathing in and out deeply.

"...You're just an a-animal." Itachi groaned while he was trying to get his breath back. "Don't you dare t-to take me again."

"Fine, fine. I'll take you another time." Kisame said and laughed a little. "And I'm half an animal remember?" After a while longer of panting, Deidara turned on his stomach, laying closer to Itachi, but still panting a little. He needed some sleep.

"Hmm, I know." Itachi hummed, as he pulled Deidara close to him.

Deidara just closed his eyes, holding onto Itachi and knowing he could fall asleep any second now. Kisame lay down next to Itachi, putting an arm around him and pulling Itachi up a little when he did.

"You're not gonna sleep now are you?" He asked.

"I actually was planning on taking a nap yes." Itachi said, as he opened his eyes and gave Kisame a kiss on the mouth.

Deidara had already passed out now, nuzzling closer into Itachi's neck.

"Hmm fine, I'll just have to take a nap as well then." He said, grinning at Itachi. "Sleep well."

"You too." Itachi said with a slight smile, before closing his eyes again and putting his head onto Kisame's shoulder. As Kisame shut his mouth Itachi sighed and slowly drifted off to sleep.

* * *

><p>Two days later, Neji was sitting outside against the edge of the forest, looking at the city they were all still living in. He was not thinking of anything else then the emotional raven who he happened to be in love with. He had been harsh to Sasuke, but Sasuke had been acting difficult. The choice between safety and happiness, it was a hard one to make. Every normal person would choose for safety first, so he was torn up in between what he should do. Sasuke was not clear in the expression of his emotions, and that way Neji was not able to guess what to do: it made the situation even harder than it already was. There was also a very strong urge to go back to Sasuke. He was torn up in between the two possibilities.<p>

As Neji was staring at the city, a little further away, Sasuke walked by, not particularly doing anything. He had gone out for a walk to calm down, and was now roaming the streets aimlessly. He spotted Neji though and stood still in his tracks, looking at the brunette. Two days. Neji had already taken two days to think whether he wanted to be with him or not. And it annoyed Sasuke to no end. He kept looking at Neji, hoping he would come to him or say something or anything.

Neji looked at Sasuke as well now. He was silent for some time before looking away with a sigh. Just a second later though, he urged Sasuke to come to him.

Sasuke kept standing there for a while, doubting if maybe he should just walk away, but he couldn't resist. He walked to Neji, but refused to meet his eyes or sit down next to him.

"I something the matter?" He asked, as stoic as he could be. Which was really stoic.

"...You won't like everything I'm going to say to you now Sasuke." Neji said. "...I can't let you go, I want to be with you, but I won't feel safe. You can't give me an indication of how big the danger is, which will force me to be on my guard all the time I'm around you."

"Well if you don't feel safe we shouldn't do this." Sasuke said, still keeping a straight face even though inside he wanted to scream at Neji to stop feeling that way. But Neji didn't like his emotions, so they had to go.

"I don't know what I'd rather want, not feeling safe or feeling miserable." Neji answered. "I think that the last thing is something I want to avoid."

"So what do you wanna do then?" Sasuke asked, crossing his arms and looking down on Neji.

"I'd rather be on my guard for the rest of my life I guess." Neji said. "I can't let you go Sasuke. I might not always say it, but I love you with my whole heart."

"I know you think that's true, but I think you're wrong." Sasuke said, still keeping up his emotionless facade.

"I know what it is to love." Neji shortly replied.

"There's also such a thing as hoping for me to be the man you want me to be. Which I'm not." Sasuke said, giving Neji a look.

"I know you think that's true, but I think you're wrong." Neji said, before giving Sasuke a look as well, gazing deeply into Sasuke's eyes.

"You want a strong, balanced person who you can feel safe with. I'm not even close to that." Sasuke said.

"...I learned to be the strong and balanced person myself right now." Neji said, sighing slightly. "You are strong as well, the balance is getting better. You are right, someone like that would be best for me, but now you happen to be the one who makes me feel happy."

Sasuke looked at Neji for a while and then sighed, sitting down next to Neji.

".. I don't think you're making a wise choice. I want you... but I want you to be happy too. And you won't be with me." He said.

"I'll be unhappier without you." Neji muttered. "You should believe me on that one."

Sasuke looked ahead of him now and stared into the distance.

"... Do you really think it's wise to stay with me?" He then asked.

"Not at all." Neji said. "I'm a fool for wanting that. But you know what they say, love makes you blind. And stupid. My brain tells me to leave, but my heart screams at me to stay. And I'd rather follow my heart in this case, because when I do so, it always brings me happiness."

"What about my happiness?" Sasuke suddenly asked, still not looking at Neji.

"I hope I can make you happy with staying with you." Neji said, sighing a little. "Both me as Itachi, and our friends of course, will do everything to make you happy again as well."

"You think staying with me in fear is going to make me happy? You think telling me you're stupid for staying, a fool even, is going to make me happy?" Sasuke asked. "Because if so, you got it all wrong. Of course I want you to stay. But not like this."

"I have to get used to the idea and you can't expect me to not fear you in the first week." Neji answered. "I won't be that happy in the first week or weeks, neither will you. But we have to get through that point."

Sasuke stared at the ground now.

"... Well I don't know if we can." He said, then looked away. Neji didn't want to see emotions in him, so he would just have to push them away.

Neji looked at Sasuke now, frowning slightly.

"Why don't you have hope for this?" He then asked.

"Because you don't want 'me'." Sasuke said. "I know you think you do, I know you think I am still that person from before, but I don't want to fall even more for you with the biggest chance of getting hurt in the end. Because I swear, if one more person I love is going to leave me in the end, I'll... I'll at least do something horrible."

Neji gave Sasuke a pained look, before turning his look away.

"I want to fight for this relationship but if you don't want that, I guess we need to end this." He then said.

"... I don't wanna drag you down with me.." Sasuke softly said, still turned away from Neji as he knew every emotion he could ever feel was right there on his face.

"..Don't you think it's the opposite now I'm clinging to you like crazy?" Neji muttered. For once, he was clueless what to do now. He was just so confused. What should he do?

"You're not dragging me down at all.." Sasuke said. "... All I want is for us to be happy again, but I don't know how to do it.. I wanna believe we're strong enough to take this, but how can we if I'm not even strong on my own? How could I ever be strong for both of us?"

"...You know I'm not defenceless Sasuke, there is no need for you to protect me now." Neji said.

"I know that... That doesn't mean I'm not supposed to be strong in mind for us to work out. And right now I'm not." Sasuke said.

"...So what do you want to do?" Neji asked.

Sasuke was silent for a very long time now, before sighing.

".. I want you to tell me what we should do." He said. He had no clue anymore. And no matter how much he hated it, right now he just had to rely on others to make the right choices for him.

"...I thought that was clear by now. I want us to fight for our relationship." Neji replied.

Sasuke was silent once again, this time even longer than before.

".. Then we should do that." He finally said.

"Are you truly willing to do so?" Neji asked, looking at Sasuke.

Sasuke finally turned to Neji again and looked him straight in the eyes.

"... If you truly think it is me you want and not the person I was before." He said.

"...You barely changed Sasuke." Neji replied, frowning slightly.

Sasuke smiled and let out a chuckle as he looked ahead of himself again.

"I'm 'just' messed up now." He said.

"..Before this you were only thinking of getting your memory back." Neji said. "..I actually like you better now."

"That's nice." Sasuke said, letting out another chuckle, making it obvious he was being sarcastic.

Neji looked away, once more.

"I would like you to not think of your problems now and think of our relationship." He then said. "I'm not talking about the fact that I'm afraid to lose the last person I love either. I want us to work out. Stop talking about how much of a dick you are or how useless you are. Do you want to be with me or not?"

"I do." Sasuke immediately said and as to prove his point, he put an arm around Neji's back, grabbing the fabric of Neji's shirt on the other side.

"Then please stop talking and let's just go for it." Neji said, as he put a hand on Sasuke's knee.

Sasuke looked at Neji and then sighed, but smiled as well. He pulled Neji closer to him.

"Ok." He said. "I'm ready to fight for it."

"Good." Neji said, giving Sasuke a nod and a slight smile. "Then so am I."

Sasuke grabbed Neji's hand and pulled him onto his lap. Resting his head against Neji's shoulder he sighed once more.

".. You know I love you right?" He asked.

"I do Sasuke, I do." Neji said, as he gave Sasuke a kiss onto his head. "I love you too. Just stop being so stubborn."

"I'll give it a try." Sasuke said and laughed slightly. He closed his eyes as he took in everything Neji was, pulling him in a tight embrace. Sasuke knew, that even if he was going to drag Neji down with him, Neji was going to pull him out of whatever misery anyway. For some reason, suddenly, he was sure Neji would save him.

Neji gave Sasuke another kiss onto his head as he closed his eyes as well, putting his arms around him. He knew they were going to have a tough time the coming weeks, but he was sure they would be fine in the end. Because both him as Sasuke would fight for their relationship, to keep what they had. And that was worth more than anything in this world.

* * *

><p><strong>The End<strong>


End file.
